Getting Punched is Paradise

It's 10 am, you wake up in your Brooklyn apartment with four of your friends from UVM's communist club. You arrive 2 hours late to your job at Starbucks. Your boss yells at you for being late again but you remind him he can't get mad at you because of your non-diagnosed anxiety. "He's perpetuating a culture of toxic masculinity and colonialism" you think to yourself. You leave your shift at Starbucks to join your friends for a Palestine march around Brooklyn. After 2 hours of chanting "from the river to the see" a very wealthy man shouts and you and says you're on the wrong side of history. Thinking on your feet, you decide to throw your drink on him. He punches you and your best friend while the other two record. Even though you started it, the internet and everyone else sides with you becauese #EatTheRich. A few months later you recieve a $25,000 settlement. You celebrate by quitting your job at Starbucks, this is more than you've ever made in a single year. Getting punched is paradise 

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