Individualism is such a lie
Title. Is it just me who feels like society just completely lies to you on this? All the time when I was in college I pretended like money would solve all my problems. It would fix my garbage social skills, lack of friends and trouble getting girls.
In reality, we're extremely social animals. Spending your life by yourself, or with one other person, is so unnatural for us as species it's insane, and yet it's the norm? People are more depressed and anxious than ever because they don't have a tribe or friendship group in their lives that we had for thousands of years before screens and the internet.
Finance is the epitome of this. People are deluded into thinking that grinding your life away to fund personal consumption will be make them happy when it doesn't. It leaves you even more disconnected from your peers.
Once you get to a certain age, you come to realization that money has significant diminishing marginal utility. It is really nice to live at least an upper middle-class lifestyle. Past that you have to decide what really matters. This varies from person to person. Be thankful you are realizing this at such a young age.
Better to realize this early on. The wealthiest guys in the world have big families who love them. The closest thing to living forever is having healthy and successful grandchildren and great grandchildren.
You would find Bowling Alone by Putnam an interesting read.
Individualism =/= being socially isolated
not sure what rabbit holes you’re in but it is widely accepted that socializing and being outgoing is essential for mental health
Right, there’s a difference between solitude and loneliness.
To me, I realized it's not enough to just do one thing well. Some people excel at their career and let their body and relationship slip. You might need to prioritize your career for 5 years out of college, but ideally that sets you up such that from that point on you can develop in other areas - friendships, family relations, fitness, general knowledge, life experience, travel, skills, hobbies. People do tend to fixate on things and make it seem as if fitness, money, being good with ladies alone are enough but I feel like you really need to strive to do it all.
Not sure who "lied to you", as I was under the impression that social connections were probably the single most important factor in maintaining physical, mental, and spiritual health and happiness.
You're not discovering anything new, you're just no longer a child. At 15 we talk about what we want to be. At 22 we (hopefully) start working towards what we want to be. At 35 the question becomes "are we working on what we want to be" and at 50 it's "Did we become what we wanted to be all those years ago". Regardless of what it is you want, the only constant is that it won't fall out of the sky.
You start loosing your friends past a certain age, unless they're you're true friends. A concept that exists all over the world, but seems to be weaker in North America. Without a community, you're dead long term too. Gotta prioritize these things.
Hope it works out.
I mean... yeah. This hyper-narrow concept of individualism has never been how the world works. Competence at virtually everything requires more than this hyper-narrow concept of individualism that you are referring to.
Also, does society really push this type of hyper-individualism?
Numquam ab tenetur similique ut minus excepturi. Qui ipsa neque est.
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