When you ask a question get a "that's a good question" response...

does it change your view of that person? Personally, I get the impression that person is rather insecure, since "that's a good question" is a filler phrase to stall for time while they think of the real answer. A truly secure person would simply allow for a moment of silence, as he/she is not afraid of appearing incompetent.

You see the phrase being used endlessly these days, and it's getting cringe-worthy.

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Best Response

I disagree with both that opinion and with what they taught you in middle school: That there are no bad questions. In my opinion, there are bad questions and good questions. A good question shows that the person understands at least something about the topic at hand, is curious to learn more, and is following the correct mental pathways to do so. tl;dr: A good question shows solid reasoning.

Brevity isn't always the goal in conversation. A conversation can be a dance. And while you can say "That's a good question" to buy time, I suspect that it usually just means that the person likes where your head is at. How much time does saying that buy you? Three seconds? They'll probably pause and think about your question before answering it if they need the time anyway. And someone is a lot more likely to just go "Ummm" or "Hmmm" to buy themselves time as that's a reflexive thing to do. Saying "That's a good question" is a conscious act that takes up brain power they supposedly need to come up with an answer to your question!

Lastly, in my limited experience, the person saying that is the person in the power position in the conversation (person conducting the job interview, people answering a question in a media interview, etc.). So they are less likely to feel the compulsion to fill any silent gaps with speech. People in power have confidence and confident people are comfortable with silence and with uncomfortable situations,

There is stuff people can say it for sure makes sense to think less of them for. This is not on that list in my opinion.

heister: Look at all these wannabe richies hating on an expensive salad. https://arthuxtable.com/
 

100% agree with golden. Unless OP is referring to a situation whereby he is in the position of power, maybe in that case he is correct. I have only received "that is a good question" during informational interviews when I ask a technical question related to someone's specific product/coverage group that clearly shows prior research.

 

It really depends on context.

I'm going to agree with Golden and Deal. Usually it's a compliment in that the other person appreciates your thinking deeply about things and your being inquisitive.

On the other hand, if you're the superior asking your subordinate why these numbers don't tie and they say "that's a good question" while not making eye-contact, showing an awkward smile, and then stumbling through the answer, then yes I'm going to think the person is stalling and doesn't have a good response.

 

Had the chance to ask my friend who has a PhD in Linguistics.

The way she described it, it's not so much a way to stall for time, but a topic diversion technique. It allows the person who responds with "that's good question" to provide a response that doesn't exactly align with your question without appearing overtly dodgy. Presumably, they don't really know the real answer.

If they jumped straight into their response, you (the person who asked the question) would think "but wait, that's not what I asked!" Saying that's a good question creates a lapse in the asker's mind. Clever.

 

Always be skeptical of the girl who showers you with "I love you"s. Every girl who has truly loved me has verbally claimed to hate my guts. As I like to say, hate it just love set ablaze.

 
"MonacoMonkey" does it change your view of that person? Personally, I get the impression that person is rather insecure, since "that's a good question" is a filler phrase to stall for time while they think of the real answer. A truly secure person would simply allow for a moment of silence, as he/she is not afraid of appearing incompetent.

You see the phrase being used endlessly these days, and it's getting cringe-worthy.

What>?

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 

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