Long-time lurker since back in the Analyst days (Analyst > Asso > Sr Asso > VP); I'm going to keep this as anonymous as possible but still hoping to get some opinions from the fine folks of WSO as I've seen a handful of these types of posts that had some absolutely phenomenal feedback.
Fairly typical background: Great undergrad, good IB program, a couple well-known MM PE platforms. I made a massive jump to a growing small PE firm in the hopes of a lifestyle change / path to never having to find another job again. Day 1, I knew I made a mistake.
Every aspect of the culture was a complete nightmare - I was always under the impression that money / prestige meant more than culture...but boy was I 100% wrong. The people, the attitude, the in-office culture, the deathly quiet workdays, no interactions amongst groups, clicky individual co-workers, stingy practices, hostile environments, clock-in / clock-out mentality paired with folks who would tell their supervisor even if a senior member of the team ducked out, "tattle-tales" for political points, and no managerial efforts to be seen for miles... made this the worst firm I've ever been a part of. Truly, truly terrible.
However, through it all, I figured I'd try and tough it out a few years and figure it out later. Well...turns out I wasn't the only one who noticed the non-cultural fit. I was just blindsided that the role wasn't working out, there were too many gaps in expectations, and that the easiest avenue was to call a mulligan and part ways. Cut losses early and move on.
I quit a great job previously, uprooted my life & family, expected the promised-land, and now in and under a year, have been let go for seemingly "cultural fit" issues that were just too apparent. I've been in this field for going on 9 years, and this has never happened....and I'm at a loss for words. Deeply diving into a pit of despair that I don't know how to curb. Girlfriend hasn't been able to get me off the couch in 48 hours and was the one who suggested I reach out to someone for advice. Y'all are hopefully that someone.
This feels like the end to everything I worked so hard for. I see no logical way to spin this story and not be red flagged. Is this it for me? Any suggestions on what to do? Firms don't hire in the holiday months - it's too hard to schedule interviews, and the most happens in the new year. I don't have that luxury.
Were there things I should have done differently? Absolutely. But end of the day, my mentors told me this - I knew it - in the long run this spot was not going to work out no matter how badly I wanted it to. The cultural gaps were just too large.
I feel sick to my stomach. Barely getting by the past week or so. Feels like a GD dreamlike state. How do I recover from this? Can I?
Any help is good help here.
While this feels like the end of the world, it’s not. 6-12 months being on the bench is a rounding error in the span of a career. I was let go from a great firm earlier in my career and spent 9 months looking for work and now I’m at a megafund. Assuming you can float yourself, take time for yourself then pick yourself up, dust off the resume, and put yourself out there. As far as narrative goes, just be your front about what happened. Some groups will view this as a non starter while others won’t care. If you can get recommendation letters from earlier colleagues I would have those handy to demonstrate this was a one-off occurrence but other than that there isn’t anything special for you to do.
It sucks. But it’s only temporary (“this too shall pass”).
Why would it feel horrific because of the culture? imo that would be the best reason to exit a firm. Why stick around a place where the people and vibe sucks?
What if you found out you were a shitty VP and had to be let go because of shitty investment acumen? I bet you’d really be in the dumps and maybe even reconsider your place in the industry.
You just joined the wrong firm dude. It happens. You sound emotional right now but over time you should find the strength to pick yourself up and be thankful for leaving a place that was not a good fit for you. I’m sure you’ll look back one day and be happy with where you are at.
It's honestly not that big of a deal, to be honest, it sounds like you've never faced that many set backs given your path. You took a small calculated risk, learned from it, and now you can move on. It doesn't sound like this set back puts your or your family into danger or financial distress, which is oftentimes the case for folks that take job/entrepreneurial risks, so you're already much better off than most. Whenever you're ready, get back on the horse, reach out the recruiters, trust me, they see stuff like this all the time, reach out to your network, tell them you're looking and that the move didn't work out, and start hunting for the next role.
One big thing I'd takeaway is, at some point, do a retrospective and try to figure out where you went wrong in your evaluation. At the end of the day, it's not terribly dissimilar from you making a bad investment as a PE partner. If you misjudge a CEO hire at a key portco and you're a partner, that reflects on you. In this case, you judged this firm wrong, made a bad investment of your time and effort, and are suffering because of it. Although you don't necessarily have the ability to diligence this opportunity the way you do an investment, there are still things you can do. Did you do reference checks on the partners? What about talk to their LPs? Did you talk to juniors, how about in a more casual setting? There's a fair amount you can do to assess the culture of the place. It's also an exercise in vetting people, did you ask the right questions?
Again, not trying to beat on you, perhaps you did all of this and there were some things you 100% could not have known going in, it happens, same with PE investments, as long as you're learning from them is what really matters.
You're getting good advice on here, but I'd also add that you should consider taking a week or two and just going somewhere else... parents' house, weekend trip somewhere, just get out of where you are now and stay busy for a bit. Don't even think about your next step until you've have a bit of time to mourn (even if it wasn't where you wanted to be, you still can be upset and grieve). This is a blip and you will absolutely land somewhere else, but it's hard to see that 30,000 foot perspective right now.
Hey dude, I know this feels like the end of the world right now to you, but I assure you it isn’t.
I went from IB to MF PE to HF. If this had happened to me after my coddled years in IB/PE, I would absolutely be in the same place you are. But being in the HF industry for a while now has helped me toughen up to reality. People get let go all the time, for reasons personal to you or not. While you do need some sense of passion to go the distance in this industry, it is a job at the end of the day. It sounds like you had way too much invested in your job and “career path” as substitute for true self-worth. Good opportunity to take a reset and turn the negative into positive. Fill up the free time by doing things you love (could be as simple as spending more time with friends/partner). Your career will be fine.
I made a similar jump when I moved to a small, up-and-coming HF in the hopes of getting on the ground floor and getting rich. It didn’t work. But you know what? The whole exercise allowed me to do a clinical, dispassionate assessment of what real risk looks like in my life. I concluded that there is actually no risk, for the floor I have set for myself by being successful in early career is that I will at least make low 6 figures no matter what I do (worst case: corporate finance or startup finance job). This is I am sure true for you as well. You actually don’t wear any real risk in the sense that you will go hungry or shelterless for the rest of your life, for the benefit of having done some IB and PE early in your career. How capricious, right? Millions who are hungrier and smarter than us don’t enjoy this luxury. So loosen up a little, enjoy your free time, and go get after it when you’re ready.