SOFR Transition - Your Experience?

Basically what the title says. I am currently working with a handful of bank lenders to convert existing loans with 1-mo LIBOR benchmark to 1-mo SOFR. Apparently 1-mo SOFR can mean many different things. Regardless, all of these loans are swapped and I'm trying to make sense of the different fallbacks for the loan and the swap and understand where lenders may be taking advantage of inexperienced borrowers.

The ISDA fallback is all standard language, the floating leg receives the sum of average SOFR compounded in arrears + 11.448bps spread adjustment (added to approximate LIBOR since SOFR is secured and LIBOR is not). Easy enough. The loans, however, use 1-MO Term SOFR as a benchmark. So the swap pays out based on backward looking rates plus some spread, and the loan is paid on forward looking rates (plus a, sometimes, different spread). In the current environment, for example, Term SOFR includes market expectations of upcoming rate increases, while ISDA SOFR does not account for a rate increase until it has already occurred. I understand that the hedge inefficiency can work to Borrower benefit, as well, but good luck to my accounting team trying to keep track of all of this.

Even besides the inefficiency of the hedge, different balance sheet lenders have quoted different "benchmark replacement adjustments" (credit spread adjustments) to approximate LIBOR. I've seen some lenders lock in 6-8bps, while others have called for the ISDA spread, and even others asking for 15bps. Is this just about who pays (ultimately) for hedge inefficiency? What is your experience negotiating these fallbacks? How is your firm handling the transition?

Appreciate any experience or thoughts you monkeys are willing to share.