Sophomore Non-Target Resume Review IBD/PE

Hello guys,

Just wondering what your opinions are. Sophomore transfer non-target looking for a boutique IB or PE summer internship.

http://www.razume.com/doc/3/a685192a-5a1f-4722-93f4-1da6c6674704-1

Thank you

EDIT - Updated
http://www.razume.com/doc/3/88cedaff-3705-4512-8ef3-300070b69fc1-1

15 Comments
 

In my opinion there is just way too much going on in the work and leadership section. You should probably split up work and leadership, and then expand on at most two experiences each. Good luck!

 
Best Response
1: break up the Work and Leadership into two sections. Work as one section. Leadership as the other. Put the Bentley Investment Group, Personal Investment Portfolio, and Wall Street Training Course, and Bryant Suite Founders under "Leadership."

This makes it much easier to read rather than sifting through all of that to see what was your work experience with other companies compared with endowments and personal work.

2: Under Technical Skills, change the Wall Street Training thing to say either Basic or Intermediate "Financial Modeling and Corporate Valuation knowledge"

No need to repeat what you've already said.

3: Take out the "Readings" section at the bottom. I'd suggest scratching out that whole thing and putting under the "Interests" section above it both WSJ and "Reading Financial Newspapers/Magazines"

These changes will make your resume look much cleaner and more organized. Overall, a solid resume for a non-target.

 

I agree that you should also split up work & leadership into 2 sections since that one section is pretty overwhelming. Also couldn't help but notice, you don't have a time frame for your role in personal investment portfolio? I think you just blocked out the place..I guess just to be consistent

 
wallstreet11I agree that you should also split up work & leadership into 2 sections since that one section is pretty overwhelming. Also couldn't help but notice, you don't have a time frame for your role in personal investment portfolio? I think you just blocked out the place..I guess just to be consistent

Wow, I did not catch that. Thanks.

Here is an updated version. What do you guys think? Thanks

http://www.razume.com/doc/3/88cedaff-3705-4512-8ef3-300070b69fc1-1

 
Waymon3x6][quote=wallstreet11I agree that you should also split up work & leadership into 2 sections since that one section is pretty overwhelming. Also couldn't help but notice, you don't have a time frame for your role in personal investment portfolio? I think you just blocked out the place..I guess just to be consistent

Wow, I did not catch that. Thanks.

Here is an updated version. What do you guys think? Thanks

http://www.razume.com/doc/3/88cedaff-3705-4512-8ef3-300070b69fc1-1[/quo…]

WSO Resume Review Score*: 8.5 (out of 15 possible)

  1. Wording/Bullets: 3.5 (don't bold words or #s in your bullets - otherwise would be a 5)
  2. Layout/Format: 2.5
  3. Overall: 2.5
  • Note: This score is based on a subjective assessment of three different criteria all on a 1 to 5 scale (1 = poor, 2 = below avg, 3 = average, 4 = very good, 5 = excellent) based on my own experience reviewing thousands of resumes in the past and based on the current state of the posted resume.

Some explanation of the grading:

1, Wording/Bullets: This score represents the overall wording of the bullets and content throughout the resume. Are there action words? are the experiences explained clearly? Does the candidate quantify their impact where possible?

  1. Layout/Format: This score represents to overall layout and format. Finance professionals are notorious for being anal. Although this score is somewhat subjective, there are certain things we look for including consistency, spacing, clean look, clear sections, proper order, etc.

  2. Overall: This score represents the experiences and school of the candidate and is the hardest to change in the short term. Improving the Wording/Bullets and Layout/Format scores can bump this grade up (usually by 1 grade at most), however, this grade depends largely on the School, GPA, Internships, Leadership, Extracurriculars of the applicant, etc.

We are going to try to provide a candid / direct grading system for as many resumes as we can in this Public Resume Review forum, with the hopes that it will lead candidates that need help on #1. and #2 criteria to consider the WSO Resume Review service that has experienced professionals ready to help bring the #1 and #2 score as close to a 4 or 5 as possible. Due to time contraints, I can't provide more detail and I can only provide this grade to each candidate once (if you try to repost and updated version under a different username, i will recognize it and ignore). What I will say is that if you aren't at a 4 or 5 in Wording and Layout, we can probably help you make significant improvments.

Some more guidelines for total overall score:

3 - 6: Needs MAJOR help / improvements in several areas 7 - 8: Has some major flaws but also has some good areas 9 - 11: An average to slightly above average resume that could still use some help but it is on "ok" shape 12 - 13: A competitive resume that should be able to land some competitive interviews 14 - 15: An impressive resume on all or almost all levels. Wording/Bullets/Layout/format and overall experience, grades, school, etc are all excellent or very good.

We suggest if you score in the bottom 3 categories listed above that you strongly consider the WSO Resume Review service. Whatever you decide, best of luck!

Thanks, Patrick

 
wallstreet11Haha no problem. Is the personal investment portfolio a club? I can't really tell since usually you have a description of it under the title. You can indicate your leadership role below it, on the same line as the date

Its not a club, its a pool of family money, mainly retirement funds. Anything I can do to make the distinction between it being a club and a personal investment account? What could I add as a "position" title to make that apparent?

FalconI'm not sure if the wall street training and your university's investment group are leadership experience.

This is what I was thinking too. Is there something I can change "Leadership Experience" to in order to include all the rest of that stuff. Maybe "Additional Relevant Experience"?

Thanks Guys

 

Additional Relevant Experience sounds a bit weird. How about "Leadership & Activities" You can also change your bottom section to "Additional Information" if you think you're repeating the activities part your bentley investment group sounds more like work experience though, how come it is under leadership experience?

 

Nothing really just fit based. It was more of practice for me going into IBD recruiting next month. Ill be realistic with you though, look for a F500 company to work at this summer, and network as hard as possible to land a IBD or P/E internship for your junior year. Seeing your GPA at Bryant and relevant work experience I think that landing a P/E or Boutique IBD internship will be very very difficult unless you have major connections. Also you absolutely need your GPA at Bentley to be 3.5+.

 
ct bankerNothing really just fit based. It was more of practice for me going into IBD recruiting next month. Ill be realistic with you though, look for a F500 company to work at this summer, and network as hard as possible to land a IBD or P/E internship for your junior year. Seeing your GPA at Bryant and relevant work experience I think that landing a P/E or Boutique IBD internship will be very very difficult unless you have major connections. Also you absolutely need your GPA at Bentley to be 3.5+.

Yeah I asked her how the interviews went. She said a lot of the people didn't even know what fixed income was haha. She also mentioned someone who talked a lot about their personal investment portfolio and in going through your posts real quick, it might have been you. Not too sure who she hired or if they even gave out an offer this time around though.

But regarding the internships, I landed one at a PE/Mezz fund near my home for the winter through one of the kids here at Bentley. I am working really hard to get my GPA up to par too, but spending an equal amount on networking as that makes a huge difference between you and the 9000 other applicants who have 3.5's as I'm sure you know. Best of luck in your job search.

 

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