Existential dread in physical commodities S&T
I work at what I would call a small merchant shop in physicals S&T. I don't want to make it sound glamorous, because it really isn't. But since the company really doesn't have that many physical assets, the PnL largely goes to the staff. So it can be an amazing set up in that regard.
I've been here 3 or 4 years now. I started as a new grad in logistics/scheduling, and have recently gotten a promotion to an entry level commercial role.
My pay is fantastic (120K USD Base, + a bonus of likely 30 % of that). My office hours are pretty standard 730 - 430, but it is truly a 24/7 on call job. I have basically gotten extremely positive feedback throughout all my career, and have been told I have a bright future here.
In spite of these positive aspects, I regularly consider jumping ship for something way different. My job makes me seriously stressed out at times, and it's impacting my personal relationships and mental health.
Basically, here's what makes me unhappy at the job
- Being a small 'trade shop', a lot of what we chase is inherently hairy. Fighting logistics problems gets really old after a while.
- It feels like our particular product/market is facing a lot of headwinds. There are way more end users leaving the market than entering.
- In general, my shop isn't really the place to learn. I'll always be second fiddle to the experienced traders who came over from super majors.
- Much of what I have to do is going out of my comfort zone. Being a small company, it's stuff like fighting over demurrage bills, begging for favors, etc.
I bounce between thinking I am amazing at my job, and thinking I need to go do something else.
If I were to leave, it would likely be for a scheduling job at a more integrated company, or more of an analytical type role. Both of which would likely be a bit of a step down in terms of pay.
I guess what I'm asking is - is it normal to feel this way in commodities? Or is the feeling of doom something I should listen to?
I hated my time in Ops. I learned a lot from it and there is no other way to learn the value chain other than scheduling I feel. But man was it stressful. the constant need to move product. To ensure you are not responsible for a unit shut down. Needing to plan in advance only for some shit to pop up and having to re-plan every thing. Never left early on a Friday since a lot of deals flowed in on Friday evenings to try and get product out on weekends.
And i dont think it will ever get better. As you go higher you'll not do the basic operations but the stress will increase. I see my physical traders work on weekends. they are always avail by call to sort shit out.
I think it’s pretty normal to not like the constant grind of being on call for ops. Quite a common complaint from people who do ops rotations to become traders.
I also think you are underestimating compensation for schedulers and analysts, at least good ones of both categories at other firms. Schedulers can top out at 200-250k that I’ve seen and (useful) analysts can make millions (though the median is probably also closer to 200k).
Speaking as a guy with less experience so take it with a grain of salt. Listen to that feeling but you don’t need to act on it. I think everyone feels that sickness at the pit of your stomach trying to piece together a deal and logistics late on a friday afternoon because you HAVE to find a home for product or cover short but it does get easier over time as you understand your network so you know the order to tap your rolodex and how to ask the favor. The deal always seems to get done but it’s a PITA no matter what. I personally really love the work but I’m with ya, definitely a grind being on call. My own personal rule is if I think this type of work in any way starts to interfere with my long term goal to start a family ie if it starts tanking relationships then I leave or once I have a kid I leave trading. It appears to be reasonably feasible to move to non-stress jobs like commodity or transportation analytics/pricing at pretty much any stage in your career from trading that I’ve seen. Don’t mess around with your mental health and overall happiness, you only get one shot with this thing called life.
I'm not in energy but in metals but I will say the stress of trading is much, much higher than in ops. In ops I got inurred to asking for favors, for stuff falling apart and needing to find fixes, ultimately I could only do so much as was physically possible and that was that. When you're trading and you can't cover your shorts and your counterparties want your head... whole different ballgame.
That said the highs are much, much higher than they could ever be in ops. Booking bangers, finally finding a clever way to cover that previously mentioned short... I don't think there are many other jobs that offer that.
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