Cute girl on campus - need advice

Okay, so there's this super cute girl on campus. I have no idea who she is, have no classes with her, and only see her once or twice a week. I only see her in my school common area, I get cold feet because if I go up to her and get rejected people will definitely notice, I don't mind the rejection but it's the setting that makes me nervous. Also, don't want to come across as creepy. I kind of just want to go up to her and another part of me feels like I should start a convo with her another way. Maybe have a friend introduce me idk. Im probably overthinking this but give me validation anyway.

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Comments (64)

Oct 12, 2021 - 5:04pm

Reeses

Pizz Help me out here bro.

Oh no, ur gonna get this topic flagged

  • 3
Oct 12, 2021 - 4:20pm

In college I would always try to meet people in more social settings since it's much easier than trying to approach them on campus out of nowhere. There's nothing wrong with that if you have the balls to do it but if you're lucky maybe you'll see her at a bar/party and you can make your move. If you can find out her name try to see if you have mutual friends

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Oct 12, 2021 - 4:29pm

True, but I don't if she'll be there, literally only see her for like an hour on Mondays, and the reason I saw her was that I was cutting class. I had some girl just randomly ask for my number in the library once, didn't even know she was sitting close to me. Too bad this girl won't do that. I think it will be best to create a scenario where I can talk to her. Maybe I spill a hot cup of coffee on her/her laptop and as she reacts that'll be my in.

  • Analyst 1 in CorpFin
Oct 12, 2021 - 4:51pm

Seems pretty binary to me - either you talk to her, she's cold and you basically get rejected or you talk to her and you're further along than you were as a stranger and secret admirer. Yes the setting isn't necessarily the best but it's not necessarily something that you can control or change so why let that be your deterrent? Chances are that most people in the common area are talking among themselves and/or preoccupied with what's on their phones/laptops so not much to worry about in terms of people seeing whether you get rejected or not unless you're an obnoxiously loud speaker or going to make your advances with a megaphone. + If you get red-faced and self-conscious about the rejection, just leave the common area immediately lmao

If/when you approach, just project confidence & sociability and strive to have a fairly quick conversation (for the sake of both parties) - introduce yourself, maybe say that you've seen her around a couple of times, ask her name, what she's studying, how's she's enjoying school/the semester so far and see how the conversation unfolds. If the convo is fairly positive, just end on a good note and say something like "I have to go, but nice meeting you xxx. I guess I'll see you around." You don't have to be a closer on the first conversation - just do enough so that you can have repeated interactions when you see her again so that you can eventually hang out.

  • Prospect in IB - Gen
Oct 12, 2021 - 4:53pm

You're overthinking this...

Just walk up to her and say, "Hey I always see you on campus, just wanted to stop by on my way to class and say hi"

If you're a decent looking dude who provides value, why the fuck would she not want to talk to you? The people watching will just assume your friends. As long as you're not asking her out right away how is she going to reject you? Just talk to her for 2-3 min, excuse yourself and grab her #.  

Oct 12, 2021 - 9:33pm

If you're going to get anywhere on Wall Street, you need to start thinking at least two steps ahead.

Don't approach her as soon as you muster the courage - do the same thing to other somewhat comparable girls until you are confident that you can execute against the primary target.

Oct 12, 2021 - 5:05pm

have you ever smiled at her and gotten a smile back? that's your first step. if you make eye contact with her, smile, and then keep doing what you're doing, be it reading something, chatting with friends, whatever. do this for a couple of weeks, and then take one of two tracks: direct or roundabout

direct: have an excuse to invite her to something. "hey, I've seen you around, I'm Reeses, nice to meet you. (this next part depends on her reception of your introducing yourself) my friends and I do a pretty good tailgate on saturday, do you and your friends have any plans for this weekends game? oh you're not going because you've got young whig party scuba diver club on saturdays? that's cool, if you don't have plans after, can I call you for the after party?" if she resists those, no worries, plenty of fish in the sea, and if it's a bad rejection, ask out the hottest girl within immediate earshot of this chick

roundabout: you keep noticing each other on campus, making eye contact, smiling, and so on, and eventually you will run into her and you'll have to say something like "nice seeing you somewhere other than the quad" and then try and strike up a conversation. this one is hit or miss, and lacks intentionality, so I don't approve

I had a situation like this in college and I've found the direct approach is always best. we locked eyes numerous times during the semester and she randomly came up to my work shopping with her friends, and after finally breaking the ice with her, I could tell she'd wanted me to approach her early on. so shoot your shot. if you're polite, offer something easy (day drinking instead of a dinner date, group instead of 1:1), and don't get angry at rejection, you'll be fine.

TLDR: shoot your shot

Oct 12, 2021 - 5:11pm

Next time I see her, I'm going to talk to her. I can't keep cutting my Monday class for this girl. It's been about two weeks and I only see her once a week so and we are already halfway through the semester so running out of time. She really got me feeling some sort of way, I feel like I'm HS again haha.

Oct 12, 2021 - 9:37pm

Look man, the key is to not give too much of a shit about her. You have to be really nonchalant about it. Talk to her like you would talk to any other person, or like you would talk to an ugly girl. You must be confident so she sees you as "above" her. Train yourself to think that if it doesn't work out, there are a million of these broads out there. Be cool about it.

Oct 12, 2021 - 5:12pm

Rejection is a key to success.   You need to find out an interest of hers and then approach her but try not to sound like a hitter.  If she does not walk away immediately, you have a shot.  If she says, I gotta go, you have been rejected.  You have nothing to lose here.  If she rejects you, it will make you more comfortable when you want to go up to the next female.  

  • 2
Oct 12, 2021 - 5:15pm

Life is about managing failure, I know that. I think the only way for me to have a shot is to just talk to her. As I said, I don't know her at all and none of my friends do either, I have seen her two or three times in two weeks and can't stop thinking about her.

Oct 12, 2021 - 5:15pm

Hey man I'll give you some tips.

First of all, if you're likely to pass someone again, you should optimally take a 2 step approach.

You don't have to get her number the first day. Just walk up to her and say "hey - I don't think we've met." And then introduce each other and then say "nice to meet you" as you end it and walk away. While you're walking away say - "hey nice shirt or earrings or necklace" or something real smooth as you walk away.

You want to plant a seed and seem mysterious and refined and confident. Let her convince herself that you're the new exciting thing. Then next time you meet her, call her out by name and she will practically beg for your details and to go out if you've done it right. 

The important part is to plant a good seed first impression and never forget confidence and humor reap dividends.

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

  • 7
Oct 12, 2021 - 8:09pm

Ok plenty of good advice on here. I would say go up to her, why are you so scared??? Go up to her and say hey I've seen you around and thought you're cute, do you wanna go out? She's in college, she wants dick as much as the girl sitting next to you in class. Don't be scared bud, she'll respect you for telling her the truth 

IF she says no (I have a bf,etc) say do you wanna be friends? Girls wants friends too. Then hang out with her, and eventually get in her pants/heart through this way eventually 

Oct 14, 2021 - 11:18pm

Why the monkey shit guys? There's nothing wrong with going up to a girl and asking her out.

Go, Go, Excel

Oct 15, 2021 - 2:47am

Fuck it. Pizz is right. You missed 100% of the shoots you don't take. And you make losses and the shots you fuck up. Go up to her, be confident and before that observe your surroundings. Hell I can pull a girl even if I walked in the wrong side of the washroom if I want to.

  • Analyst 2 in IB - Gen
Oct 12, 2021 - 10:02pm

tell her you work at an EB. or even better: you are an incoming summer analyst at Houlihan RX & that is much more prestigious than GS.

Oct 13, 2021 - 7:42am

I'm honestly really hoping this works out for you. I stayed in a shitty ass relationship throughout all 4 years of college but always had those "cute girl over there" thoughts and wanted to do something about it. Keep us updated brotha

Oct 13, 2021 - 9:36am

I'm going to just make it real easy, put your Apple Watch in your pocket before you get to that area of campus, then when you see her "how do you like your Apple Watch I've been thinking about getting one?" 
 

With a bit of eq you'll be breaking the slats under her mattress in no time.

  • 1
Oct 13, 2021 - 7:27pm

Just go up to her and start a convo. I think of approaching girls as a win-win situation. If she likes you and gives you her number, that's great. If she doesn't like you, that's rejection therapy. You wanna become super comfortable with rejection 

  • Intern in Consulting
Oct 13, 2021 - 8:55pm

Do you ever catch her staring at you? If so it'll make the interaction much easier. I agree with the two step approach that other people have said. College girls don't really like randos just straight up asking for their number in non party settings so building some rapport the first time simplifies when you ask her later on. 

Oct 18, 2021 - 8:39pm

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  • Prospect in IB - Gen
Oct 19, 2021 - 12:07am

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