How many of the senior bankers on your team do you reckon will die alone
I never really thought of my superiors as being human and just wrote them off as being married, divorced, terribly inconvenienced by the fact that they are indeed married, really good at getting divorced, asexual, or hopeless. That last category includes some of the serial direct promotes at the higher levels (in their 30's) who have crossed paths with a few friends of mine on dating apps and, since every girl thinks that since you work at X bank, you must surely know every one of your thousands of 'coworkers' so please tell her immediately of his personality (is he just tryna fuk) and how he is at work (base salary and bonus, NOW), I've been unfortunate enough to glance at a few of their profiles.
Shit is sad.
- One of the dorkier guys has a profile that reads like a shitty PowerPoint trying to convince girls of his worth (think background, situation, value add, conclusion - good flow tho)
- Another pasted a laundry list of what he wants in a partner and it was so out of touch with the real world (and kind of offensive) that I winced
- Another's had pictures that either featured entire clouds of photoshopped hair or were dug up from a time capsule, and some of the photos were straight ODD as fuck
Nary a chill has been present in any of the profiles I've encountered and all of them seem to feature some variation of the last ditch "I work in investment banking but have other passions and interests and time please believe me / I AM VERY SUCCESSFUL / $$$ in my pockets, please just graze my hand if only for 10 seconds" spiel. I get that these dudes have known nothing other than fluorescent lighting and seamless dinners and disturbing levels of intimacy with the Microsoft office suite for the past decade, but it was troubling to witness that level of desperation and social unawareness emanating from people I can usually bring myself to respect about 25% of the time.
I know that we always make fun of the working environment and how banking ruins our lives and denies us our freedom, but does it stop being such a joke after some point? After reading the somewhat depressing inner thoughts of the people who throw shit my way on a daily basis, I can't help but think that they really might die alone. I can just do their bidding, wipe the shit off, and nope the fuck out of the office once I'm done, but what about them? Will I become them? Are they the future me?
Is this nonsensical post a result of my accidentally having taken a second dose of Adderall because of transient fatigue-induced memory loss? Damn straight
There are losers in in all careers and socioeconomic brackets. In fact, for the most part, sexual experience and prestige careers are definitely strongly negatively correlated. I don't think it's a banking thing, it's more of a "I went to a top school and got top grades" instead of having casual sex and doing drugs in high school and college like normal people. That said, most hyper successful guys will find a girl by their mid to late 30's.
I wouldn't go so far as to say negatively correlated.
Celebrities and Athletes aside(who most definitely DO get laid because of what they do), your profession is of absolutely no interest to most women. A certain subset will care if you're rich.....but if I may be so crude (it's the best way to communicate this), for most women it is dependent on whether you can get their panties wet first. Some women will also care about whether you'd be a good head of the household in the long term, but they won't even get to asking that about you unless they find you sexually attractive.
For me though I will fully admit to being boring professionally. A lot of things have changed since undergrad so I'm not really interested in partying. At this point all I really care about is having a job where I get to learn top-notch deal skills, have enough pressure that I don't feel bored, and have enough cash squirreled away that I can afford to take some awesome vacations once I have kids old enough to appreciate it.
True and false. From my experience, bishes don't necessarily care about which profession you're in per se but they do care about your profession in a different sense...almost all of them look for ambition in whatever you're doing...female biology is hardwired to associate any kind of professional ambition with the protector/provider traits
Then again this applies more to dating. If you're looking for a quick one-night romp sesh, just be tall, fit, and not too too creepy
So I take it that you're not in NY
Clearly you've never done bottles & models, bro. Is this the next Brady incarnation?
I've been in a long-term relationship and I'm now engaged, but yes I've been to clubs and have had bottle service plenty of times with people in finance and other careers- for the most part they have no game. Lots of bottles, very few models. Well girls do come by, to get free drinks, but they never seem to go home with the guy. Of course, this is a generalization, some IB people do get girls, but it's a much lower percentage than college students on this site believe. I don't think it's my social circle either - my friends with more modest jobs and accomplishments (e.g. people who spent college partying instead of getting top grades), are getting laid frequently and/or are married to attractive girls by their late 20's/early 30's. (By modest I still mean upper middle class and successful....just not 4.0 at Harvard successful).
You do know you can have casual sex, party, and still get top grades right?
You clearly missed sarcasm in my last post. Also, most Harvard (4.0?) grads end up being upper middle class.
This reads just like Monkey Business... If it was true back then, it's definitely true today, the only things that's changed is that it's more in the spotlight today then it was back then.
I feel like most of the senior bankers in my group will stay married. I hope one of them dies alone though.
There's only one way to make sure that happens, school shooter
Everyone dies alone bro, haven't you seen Donnie Darko? In my time of dying, I plan to crawl into the woods and expire like a fucking squirrel. Dust to dust.
Why does everyone on this forum think senior bankers can't be happy? My group is consistently top 3 in the league tables for our sector and everyone is happily married with kids...sheesh. The people who aren't married aren't married because they're douche bags or losers, not because they're in banking.
I think it all depends on where you work and the attitude of your group. At my regional boutique, all of the MDs are married (cannot guarantee all of them are happy), but I have friends at BBs and MMs that tell me that their superiors seem to hate their lives, are single, and are on the verge of suicide. I have friends that work in BBs that tell me the opposite as well.
If you work in a super intense group, this is bound to be more prevalent. If your group is lax, then you'll see senior and junior guys having more time to meet people and eventually get married (marriage is not correlated with happiness however; statistically, it is a coin flip).
At one of the places I worked (a BB), a SA was talking to me and telling me how he couldn't believe how successful all these guys were and how he couldn't wait to be one of those guys and have the house and the car, etc. I said to him, without thinking, "Yeah, just for all those guys to throw that all at an attractive girls feet the second they meet them.". He seemed taken aback by this so I laughed it off....but it was true.
Here are things that men in finance have mentioned to me within the first three dates:
Their apartment on park avenue. Their $2M apartment in Tribeca Their private roofdeck (which in this case, I learned months later that it indeed wasn't private and open to all tenants in his building!!!) Travel across the world Never having to work again in my life if I didn't want to (this comes up very often) Lots of oral (lies!)
Personally, I don't care what a guy does, as long as he makes me laugh, can maintain a job other than bartender and treats others well.
Anyway, the main post made me laugh because YES there are some total squares in finance and sometimes I am amazed that they even got married.....
This is such a lie. Girls care very much about how much money their partner makes, especially for marriage.
first marriage is for love, second one is for net worth
I agree. Girls care.
Isn't that the most ridiculous thing to lie about? It still cracks me up.
I lol'd.
About as many as any executives at any company.
Veniam vel vitae facilis et in rem doloremque consectetur. Pariatur ut quod enim voluptate quo. Eius est cum sunt officia dolore. Voluptates magnam aperiam deserunt corrupti. Dignissimos deleniti error omnis est.
Sit inventore voluptas nemo fugiat cumque quos. Dolorem perferendis eius sit nobis qui dolores eos voluptatem. Dolorem cupiditate quae explicabo odio. Esse molestiae magnam ullam minima explicabo animi.
Eum tenetur quia dolor voluptate soluta possimus et. Esse facilis qui vel doloremque nulla. Ut dolor sit ad ea qui rerum. Consequuntur voluptate nemo sed sit quia aut odio. Adipisci voluptates error aut id voluptate et.
See All Comments - 100% Free
WSO depends on everyone being able to pitch in when they know something. Unlock with your email and get bonus: 6 financial modeling lessons free ($199 value)
or Unlock with your social account...
Dicta at neque minima quia consequatur sint consequatur. Cumque unde quia quas. Tenetur fugiat dignissimos ut. Libero veritatis natus aliquam non autem dolorem quo. Alias enim libero et. Est quia ut at maiores ex aspernatur deleniti autem.