Interviewers Asking About Family

Recently I've had a couple interviewers ask about my family, maybe about home life, what my parents do, if I have siblings, if I have pets etc. Are they just trying to get a better sense of who I am, or is their some underlying messages/redflags they are testing for. I'm always a little weirded out by these questions as while I have no problem sharing info on my personal life, especially if it helps the interviewer get to know me better, receiving these questions in like a first or second round seem a bit out of place. Are they looking to see if I had an intellectually stimulating home life, or if my family would be some kind of distraction for me in the future?

Maybe I am just overthinking but would love to hear what others think.

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Lol They're being courteous and asking in light of the recent coronavirus pandemic..

You're overthinking this way too much and/or need to learn some social skills.

 

I second this. You need social skills, I don't know why you're all defensive.

 

I've also had a few pretty weird experiences with this during superdays (never in a 1st or 2nd round). Always an MD too. Once had an MD ask what my parents do, where my siblings went to college, etc. I assume it's just them trying to get a more full picture of who you are (do you have rich parents and siblings went to target schools or are you someone who overcame a lot to get this interview) but that's just a guess.

 

I recently got unique questions asked that wasn't family. They asked how I was involved in hs and what music I listen to. Asked by MD at BB

 

Why are people saying low EQ? If OP is diversity, first generation, or underqualified-but-rich-family-connected I could totally see how these questions could make you think a little bit. Definitely not out of bounds to ask and many who do are just generally curious, but there definitely are some people who will stigmatize a candidate based on these things.

 

This is certainly a situation where the interviewer is just trying to get to know you better, though I will note it is illegal for an employer to make a hiring decision based on marital status, kids, family, etc.

So if the questions are particularly probing, it may be a bit of a red flag, but more likely than not just them trying to get a more full picture of who you are.

 

I had a recruiter ask me once about a challenge I went through. I mentioned working on-campus to support my self financially while managing grades and extracurriculars. I wasn't going to make up some bs and my experience actually did teach me a lot about the value of hard work. He then said that if I am concerned about my financials to apply to a bigger company because the pay is better lol he then questioned why I even chose the school I go to because the tuition is high. Turns out when I looked at his linkedin he went to my unis competitor. I agree sometimes personal conversations can go wrong.

 

Sometimes an interviewer will ask about your family to put you at ease. More often, he or she is trying to probe what social class you are. Often an interviewer is biased, usually unconsciously, toward candidates with backgrounds similar to their own. It's the reason why, in the "good old days," few blacks, Jews or women got jobs in finance and many other professional fields.

In the U.S. asking a candidate if they're married or plan to start a family is illegal. So is asking about race, color or national origin; religion; sex, gender identity or sexual orientation; pregnancy status or number of children; disability; age or genetic information; or citizenship. In some places, asking whether an applicant has been convicted of a crime is also illegal.

 

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