There've been a couple of posts on this board about good alternatives to banking. Some of you think consulting is better, or law school, or the Special Forces, or what have you.
Well, I want to put my two cents in. If I could go back in time and make all my choices again, I wouldn't be an analyst. I'd be a career criminal. Just think about it.
The benefits of doing time in jail instead of an analyst's cube:
In jail, you get to sleep. A lot. Probably at least double the hours that I get.
You get to read all the books you want. I haven't read a book since I started.
You get to make occasional private phone calls to your family. As for me, I can't remember the last time I talked to my mother without the whole floor being able to hear me.
You get to exercise on a daily basis. Analysts don't. I sure as hell don't.
Your cell is bigger than a cubicle, AND it contains a toilet -- no walking across the whole damn floor every time you need to pee.
You have the right to get laid. They even give you some time and privacy for your conjugal visit. In contrast, it's been forever since I had time to get laid.
You get haircuts in jail. I've been trying to find time to get one since December. My split ends have split ends.
If you're sick in jail, you get healthcare. As an analyst, good luck finding time.
If you get REALLY sick in jail, you get a doctor. As an analyst, you just keep putting it off until you get better on your own or end up in the hospital.
In jail you have the right to bathe and groom yourself every day. As an analyst, those things sometimes have to take a back seat.
Sure, in jail you may not have the freedom to go anywhere. Your social life is over. You may even only see sunlight once or twice a week. Your family and friends may give up on you. You become a social pariah, of course. People look down on you for screwing up your life so badly. And if you ever manage to get a parole, it can be very hard to make the transition back to life on the outside.
Seriously, though, how different is that from banking?
Not to mention you compare
Not to mention you compare it to banking only AFTER you get caught. If you dont get caught, then you are really livin the life.
Perfect example why women
Perfect example why women aren't making any strides in the world than men. Ya ya, don't give me all the bs about women in executive positions.
Re: Perfect example why women
Perfect example why women aren't making any strides in the world than men. Ya ya, don't give me all the bs about women in executive positions.
...
What are you talking about? Did you accidentally post in the wrong thread?
Great post! Dunno about the
Great post! Dunno about the benefit of having to carry a shank over having to have a lawyer for personal protection, but this venture guy from Boston has a similar "grass is always greener" post about startups, VC, PE and Hedgies. There's a running comp for guessing which one's better (well...not really...I made that up but check out the post anyway).
http://bostonvcblog.typepad.com/vc/2006/01/the_grass_is_al.html
Re: Alternative careers
btw: for those interested, the hot opportunities are in white collar crime...particularly in the Romanian mob...they're hiring for all sorts of online identity fraud scams
the benefits? travel (of course!), plus seriously impossible evidentiary burden of proof and jurisdictional issues - so in case you do get pinched, the prosecutors probably won't make it stick..and if they do, forget super max - you'll be doing minimum time in a nicely air conditioned, federal country club where the only things softer than the pillows are the guards
There've been a couple of posts on this board about good alternatives to banking. Some of you think consulting is better, or law school, or the Special Forces, or what have you.
Well, I want to put my two cents in. If I could go back in time and make all my choices again, I wouldn't be an analyst. I'd be a career criminal. Just think about it.
The benefits of doing time in jail instead of an analyst's cube:
In jail, you get to sleep. A lot. Probably at least double the hours that I get.
You get to read all the books you want. I haven't read a book since I started.
You get to make occasional private phone calls to your family. As for me, I can't remember the last time I talked to my mother without the whole floor being able to hear me.
You get to exercise on a daily basis. Analysts don't. I sure as hell don't.
Your cell is bigger than a cubicle, AND it contains a toilet -- no walking across the whole damn floor every time you need to pee.
You have the right to get laid. They even give you some time and privacy for your conjugal visit. In contrast, it's been forever since I had time to get laid.
You get haircuts in jail. I've been trying to find time to get one since December. My split ends have split ends.
If you're sick in jail, you get healthcare. As an analyst, good luck finding time.
If you get REALLY sick in jail, you get a doctor. As an analyst, you just keep putting it off until you get better on your own or end up in the hospital.
In jail you have the right to bathe and groom yourself every day. As an analyst, those things sometimes have to take a back seat.
Sure, in jail you may not have the freedom to go anywhere. Your social life is over. You may even only see sunlight once or twice a week. Your family and friends may give up on you. You become a social pariah, of course. People look down on you for screwing up your life so badly. And if you ever manage to get a parole, it can be very hard to make the transition back to life on the outside.
Seriously, though, how different is that from banking?
when do we get a new one?
when do we get a new one?
she cant type from her jail
she cant type from her jail cell
hahahaha nice.
hahahaha
nice.
I've been traveling and
I've been traveling and working a little too much. But don't worry... new stuff is coming!
Err...They money is a BIG
Err...They money is a BIG factor. I prison your trading soap for a pack of ciggs or a POT NOODLE for a porno.
In Ibanker world your thinking about your Porsche Turbo parked up gathering dust and wife cheating on you because your never there. The money is what makes you happy.
Money - The root to all happiness.
Its a better life when you hit partner. If your still around.
And Im sure you guys in the States work your proverbial asses off for the same salary we Brits get her in London, and the Ibankers here get time to see their wives/gf and drive their SUV trucks over the weekend simply because after 9pm we all switch off (mentally).
Haha you Ibankers whine way
Haha you Ibankers whine way too much...
I mean good God, you ACTUALLY have to walk to the bathroom?!? You poooor thing.
Hopefully that juicy bonus will make you feel better about your split ends...
:P