12/21/11

WSO,

So I recently put in my resignation letter and giving my 2 weeks notice. The boss, at the time, seemed upset but not overly dramatic about it. Then, yesterday I exchanged emails giving my official date and for whatever reason, he was not pleased. Thereafter, he started attacking me personally, telling me I was a wasted investment by the company along with other rants.

My question is, How should I go about this? Should I even give a rat's a$$? All suggestions welcome.

Comments (71)

Best Response
12/21/11

Do your best to leave on good terms, but if that can't be done, I seem to remember an old saying that is going to work wonders at driving people who hate you crazy:

If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat;
if he is thirsty, give him water to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head...

Be nice and carry yourself with a genuinely friendly, carefree attitude. You're happy for the firm, you're happy for yourself, and you'll be gone soon, so what's wrong with being nice to folks?

The contrast between you and your boss will be striking and folks will remember you a whole lot better.

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12/21/11

Guy sounds like a d-bag. Forward the email to legal claiming harassment

12/21/11

Probably better to not further burn bridges by stooping to his level. Of course, it depends on what was said. Can you post the body of the email?

12/21/11

As annoying as this is, you should try to play it above the board. Don't go to his level. Instead, express your regret that it didn't work out, say you understand his concern, and that you would like to do whatever you can to leave the firm on good terms (extra work in the next couple of weeks to leave the department in good shape, etc. -- whatever he thinks would be helpful). You don't want to burn bridges in this business, it can come back to bite you in the ass.

12/21/11

Thanks guys for the response. In a nutshell, he said the following:

-Wasted investment by company
-Misjudged my "character"
-Would kick my ass if I was his mentor
-That I must really hate the company

12/21/11

Save every email, print them out or forward them to your personal account.

Make sure the new gig is going to work out well

Forward all emails to Bess Levin

Sit back and laugh

Inform us

:)

Get busy living

12/21/11

definitely take a dump on his keyboard

I eat success for breakfast...with skim milk

12/21/11

next time, try meeting up with you boss and asking him if his firm can match you new job offer's salary. if they can't (which is very likely) you won't come off as a "wasted investment" (which i doubt you are). its very understandable to leave because your getting a higher salary.

12/21/11
12/21/11

lol the dump idea got me. yeah the new job is paying significantly more with a higher title, so i doubt my company will match. these managers get so butthurt

12/21/11

Slap him in the dick.

Under my tutelage, you will grow from boys to men. From men into gladiators. And from gladiators into SWANSONS.

12/21/11

save the emails for future backstabbing opportunities

12/21/11

Fuck him up in a street fight and then fuck his wife.

12/21/11

1) Where do you work in general terms (F500, small firm, etc)

2) He actually said he would 'kick your ass'?

I only ask because if you're at a F500 and he did, HR probably already knows.

If I had asked people what they wanted, they would have said faster horses - Henry Ford

In reply to TheKing
12/21/11
TheKing:

Fuck him up in a street fight and then fuck his wife.

Whoa. Respect.

12/21/11

You shouldn't do anything.

12/21/11

Yup best is to ignore completely or do what Ravenous said..

12/21/11

I second the wife idea.

12/21/11

This happens all the time. Save the emails, but other than that do nothing...unless he has hot daughters.

12/21/11

I told off my ex boss after he gave me a similar rant. It was a bad move, as he forwarded it to the group (it was small) and it made me look like shit. Do not do it. If you do want to say something be as professional as possible. Thank him for the opportunity and apologize for any inconvenience. That has the potential to go MUCH further and may benefit you. That is what I wish I did.

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12/21/11

Don't do anything rash. People get overly emotional to what they see as a personal rejection. Egos are very delicate in the higher levels of management.

My advice to you is not to turn it into a battle of egos. You need for your boss to find a way to save face without compromising your move or future references. Take him out to lunch and have a proper break up talk.

Something similar happened to me when I decided to lateral to another firm shortly after being promoted. Our CEO and one of our Directors took it very personally and became emotional.

The CEO gave me a long lecture about integrity and how the industry is very small, everyone knows everyone and that people have long memories (all true, but irrelevant to my move). He then tried to block my move by calling my new boss and saying that he was offended that he hadn't asked his permission to poach me and threatened to go to the CEO/Chairman of their firm. I actually hadn't signed yet and this frightened my new boss enough to hold off for a month leaving me in limbo.

I really had to scramble, I interviewed with an investment bank while I tried to resolve the mess. In the end my old CEO agreed not to try to block my move after I got my new boss to call him. The old CEO saw it as an "apology" and my new boss saw it as clarifying that he hadn't done anything wrong. It was very tough trying to frame the issue for them in this way.

Fast forward 3 years, they are both at other roles and I still look at the occasional deal with each of them.

It's not your fault your boss is a child, but it is up to you to protect yourself and manage/diffuse the situation.

In reply to TheKing
12/21/11
TheKing:

Fuck him in the street.

In reply to TechBanking
12/21/11
TechBanking:

This happens all the time. Save the emails, but other than that do nothing...unless he has hot daughters.

I'd like to revise my original statement. If he has hot daughters, that's a completely different scenario.

In reply to TheKing
12/21/11
TheKing:

Fuck him up in a street fight and then fuck his wife.

word. i like this suggestion a lot.

And for the other questions above, this is fortune 100 company.

In reply to IlliniProgrammer
12/21/11
IlliniProgrammer:

Do your best to leave on good terms, but if that can't be done, I seem to remember an old saying that is going to work wonders at driving people who hate you crazy:

If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat;
if he is thirsty, give him water to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head...

Be nice and carry yourself with a genuinely friendly, carefree attitude. You're happy for the firm, you're happy for yourself, and you'll be gone soon, so what's wrong with being nice to folks?

The contrast between you and your boss will be striking and folks will remember you a whole lot better.

thanks Illini, this is what I will most likely do. i've put in a ton of hours, transformed all the processes that were broken at the place, and was awarded by the CFO. just caught me by surprise when he issued that email to me.

In reply to IlliniProgrammer
12/21/11
IlliniProgrammer:

Do your best to leave on good terms, but if that can't be done, I seem to remember an old saying that is going to work wonders at driving people who hate you crazy:

If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat;
if he is thirsty, give him water to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head...

Be nice and carry yourself with a genuinely friendly, carefree attitude. You're happy for the firm, you're happy for yourself, and you'll be gone soon, so what's wrong with being nice to folks?

The contrast between you and your boss will be striking and folks will remember you a whole lot better.

+1 IP.

12/21/11

this guy will be "the guy i used to work for" in 2 weeks. chill out and enjoy showing up to work at 10am til new year's.

12/21/11

Get your ducks in a line, and keep a general smile on your face, like IP said. Be the better man. If he tries to fuck you over during your transition - that's when you begin to go on the offensive.

12/21/11

set up a meeting before your last day with him and HR or your direct supervisor and just be classy about. say you wanted to debrief before you left, mention that its too bad he feels that way (not mentioning any if the exact details) etc. Be classy, calm and collected...its one of the few moments in your life where you can practice/learn heading into a hostile environment and holding your own. These are good lessons and situations to learn from.

good luck at the next job!

In reply to RagnarDanneskjold
12/21/11
RagnarDanneskjold:

If he tries to fuck you over during your transition - that's when you begin to go on the offensive.

What are the parameters / guidelines for this? Insane / criminal reactions aside, how far does this go?

Get busy living

12/21/11

This is a quality thread. Good job WSO

In reply to UFOinsider
12/21/11
UFOinsider:
RagnarDanneskjold:

If he tries to fuck you over during your transition - that's when you begin to go on the offensive.

What are the parameters / guidelines for this? Insane / criminal reactions aside, how far does this go?

By offensive, I mean start with HR...lol some of you crazy fucks need to turn it down a bit.

12/21/11

hey everyone, really appreciating all the responses. made my day lol.

12/21/11

Or as Ace Hood said, "Fcuk this Industry, B!tch I'm in these streets."

12/21/11

Remember, if you just ooze charm and remain in front of your colleagues for the rest of your time there, there's not a whole lot the guy can do to you in terms of your standing at the firm.

I don't think there's a need to go on the "offensive" regardless of what OP's manager does. You want to be seen/remembered as wanting him to look good. And if he wants to look like a jerk, that's fine. If you're a political mastermind, you might be able to help him a bit with that, but the conservative strategy is to be happy for him, be happy for the firm, and enjoy your last two weeks without any major blow-ups.

Your boss may be pissed, but he really can't do anything to you. That's probably *why* he's so pissed. Your being happy, content, relaxed, and carefree while he goes into a rage is simply your way of getting back at him for making a big to-do of this- and letting him know that he can't really hurt you at this point and needs to focus his efforts elsewhere.

In reply to Ches
12/21/11
Ches:

Or as Ace Hood said, "Fcuk this Industry, B!tch I'm in these streets."

waka flocka

Just reply with "oh word" or something like that.

In reply to IlliniProgrammer
12/21/11
IlliniProgrammer:

Do your best to leave on good terms, but if that can't be done, I seem to remember an old saying that is going to work wonders at driving people who hate you crazy:

If your enemy is hungry, give him food to eat;
if he is thirsty, give him water to drink.
In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head...

Be nice and carry yourself with a genuinely friendly, carefree attitude. You're happy for the firm, you're happy for yourself, and you'll be gone soon, so what's wrong with being nice to folks?

The contrast between you and your boss will be striking and folks will remember you a whole lot better.

This try hard to preserve your character and not stoop to the level of that obviously insecure superior of yours, but at the same time don't flaunt it in his or other peoples faces. Move quiet and humble.

'We're bigger than U.S. Steel"

In reply to TheKing
12/21/11
TheKing:

Fuck him up in a street fight and then fuck his wife.

That's the way John Wayne woulda done it.

12/21/11

Forward the e-mails to HR / Legal with nothing in the body except "FYI"

12/21/11

Any firm over a few hundred people is likely to have an HR department that cares about this sort of thing. You could forward it on to them with a note saying you found it unprofessional and not up to the firm's standards or something like that. I wouldn't expect any drastic action to result, but it will be put on file and if his assholish behavior has been a problem in the past, or continues in the future, he is likely to get a smack.

In reply to someotherguy
12/21/11
someotherguy:

Any firm over a few hundred people is likely to have an HR department that cares about this sort of thing. You could forward it on to them with a note saying you found it unprofessional and not up to the firm's standards or something like that. I wouldn't expect any drastic action to result, but it will be put on file and if his assholish behavior has been a problem in the past, or continues in the future, he is likely to get a smack.

I generally agree with this unless the guy is very senior. Then it won't really matter what HR think.

12/21/11

Seriously? Is that the main-page-quality material??

Stick out the two week notice, keep calm, ignore the guy. Then leave and forget.

12/21/11

Send him a picture of your dick. Find a random pic of a tiny dick on the internet and label yours as yours and his at the tiny one.

Follow the shit your fellow monkeys say @shitWSOsays

Life is hard, it's even harder when you're stupid - John Wayne

12/21/11

Seriously, when he gets pissed off, just practice smiling and laughing kindly. "I knew you were pissed I was leaving but I didn't know I meant that much to you Frank!" This will either disarm the situation and/or make him even more angry. Either way, it will be fun.

In reply to Relinquis
12/21/11

You can always consider the option of doing your last day in khakis and a hawaiian shirt while chomping a stogie. Not good for ever going back there, just throwing the idea into the mix...

Get busy living

12/21/11

Keep it diplomatic and civilized at all time.

In reply to TheKing
12/21/11
TheKing:

Fuck him up in a street fight and then *rape* his wife.

Fixed it for ya^^

12/21/11
In reply to trade4trade
12/22/11
trade4trade:

just reply "u jelly bro?"

its either this or "come at me, bro"

In reply to heister
12/22/11
heister:

Send him a picture of your dick. Find a random pic of a tiny dick on the internet and label yours as yours and his at the tiny one.

This

In reply to alphaSledge
12/22/11
alphaSledge:
trade4trade:

just reply "u jelly bro?"

its either this or "come at me, bro"

Love this!

Illi, good advice as always.

I had this happen a few months ago when I left my former job. My boss who was in a diff state called me screaming at me asking me why I thought I had the right to move, and how he was disappointed and that I was unable to make these kind of decisions. What was I thinking. And then what made it even worse was I refused to tell anyone where I was going or what I was doing and he started screaming at me about that, and how could I leave the group, yada yada yada. I did pretty much what Illi recommended, apologized for the inconvience so to speak, offered to stay longer to help train a new hire that had started a few weeks prior, etc. I made sure not to burn a bridge, and everyone who I directly worked w/ I still talk to / have a good relationship w/, no bridges burned.

In reply to xc48cross
12/22/11
xc48cross:
alphaSledge:
trade4trade:

just reply "u jelly bro?"

its either this or "come at me, bro"

Love this!

Illi, good advice as always.

I had this happen a few months ago when I left my former job. My boss who was in a diff state called me screaming at me asking me why I thought I had the right to move, and how he was disappointed and that I was unable to make these kind of decisions. What was I thinking. And then what made it even worse was I refused to tell anyone where I was going or what I was doing and he started screaming at me about that, and how could I leave the group, yada yada yada. I did pretty much what Illi recommended, apologized for the inconvience so to speak, offered to stay longer to help train a new hire that had started a few weeks prior, etc. I made sure not to burn a bridge, and everyone who I directly worked w/ I still talk to / have a good relationship w/, no bridges burned.

If your boss is that much of a pussy, tell him to go fuck himself.

Follow the shit your fellow monkeys say @shitWSOsays

Life is hard, it's even harder when you're stupid - John Wayne

In reply to heister
12/22/11
heister:
xc48cross:
alphaSledge:
trade4trade:

just reply "u jelly bro?"

its either this or "come at me, bro"

Love this!

Illi, good advice as always.

I had this happen a few months ago when I left my former job. My boss who was in a diff state called me screaming at me asking me why I thought I had the right to move, and how he was disappointed and that I was unable to make these kind of decisions. What was I thinking. And then what made it even worse was I refused to tell anyone where I was going or what I was doing and he started screaming at me about that, and how could I leave the group, yada yada yada. I did pretty much what Illi recommended, apologized for the inconvience so to speak, offered to stay longer to help train a new hire that had started a few weeks prior, etc. I made sure not to burn a bridge, and everyone who I directly worked w/ I still talk to / have a good relationship w/, no bridges burned.

If your boss is that much of a pussy, tell him to go fuck himself.

^^ this was plan B

12/22/11

Also this whole, don't burn bridges dribble is stupid. Unless the industry is so intertwined like IB is who gives a shit if you burn bridges at your old job. You are leaving for a reason.

Follow the shit your fellow monkeys say @shitWSOsays

Life is hard, it's even harder when you're stupid - John Wayne

12/23/11

Stay classy, not for the sake of anyone, but yourself. Save the emails on your USB and send them to yourself. Give yourself a week to think, the most tempting answer is to key his car, shit on his desk and fuck his wife on camera. I'm not going to lie it would probably feel incredible to do, however the high is short lived and the consequences serious. So apply some tincture of time, it's probably best not to respond.

12/23/11
In reply to guyfromct
12/23/11
futurectdoc:

apply some tincture of time

nicely stated...

Get busy living

12/23/11

Eddie if I made you laugh I deserve an SB

12/23/11
12/24/11

Start drinking scotch and splenda at work (tastes like splenda, gets drunk like scotch)

12/24/11

Not all bosses are good. Always take the high road, and when you get into a managerial role later on remember to act in a classier manner than he did.

Metal. Music. Life. www.headofmetal.com

In reply to In The Flesh
12/24/11
In The Flesh:

Not all bosses are good. Always take the high road, and when you get into a managerial role later on remember to act in a classier manner than he did.

thanks everyone for the comments/suggestions. i've had my share of sh*tty managers while being here, and was caught by surprised with this one since he came off really chill...

In reply to alphaSledge
12/27/11
alphaSledge:
In The Flesh:

Not all bosses are good. Always take the high road, and when you get into a managerial role later on remember to act in a classier manner than he did.

thanks everyone for the comments/suggestions. i've had my share of sh*tty managers while being here, and was caught by surprised with this one since he came off really chill...

^^^^^^^^ YEAH, it's strange how people can just turn all Jekyll and Hyde. When I put in my two weeks at my last job, the boss stuck me in a spare cubicle at the end of the hall and the whole group gave me the cold shoulder. Then they started asking where I was going and joking that they were going to call my new boss and tell him to can me. I'm not so sure they were "just kidding". Really crazy part is that the company was going to sell itself off a few months down the line and they had already started laying people off...people who had helped start the firm...so I don't really understand why they think anyone would be loyal after that.

Get busy living

12/30/11

I would act professional until the end of your employment with the firm. In reality, your boss is upset most likely because you did good work and your departure now forces him to find a replacement (not impossible, but always challenging and requires a lot of effort). Always keep in mind that it's a small world, and at the end of the day, your paths may cross, and you may need him (for school/job reference, etc.) Also, I wouldn't slack off - just don't give your boss any reason to justify his current behavior.

In reply to bhartman98
12/30/11
bhartman98:

don't give your boss any reason to justify his current behavior.

This is extremely well stated

Get busy living

12/30/11

this is true of life in general.

8/5/12

Work really hard for your soon-to-be-ex-boss if you still have the opportunity. Stay late and delegate your duties carefully. Otherwise, the crazy boss can easily send emails to your new boss about integrity, work ethics and whatever issues he thinks you might have.

The Auto Show

In reply to huanleshalemei
8/8/12

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In reply to Edmundo Braverman
8/9/12
8/9/12
In reply to fez
10/19/12

This could be it, sweetheart.

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