Advice for Living in New York

NYCbandar's picture
Rank: Senior Gorilla | 817

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I F***ING HATE NEW YORK and contained great info for any incoming SAs living in NY soon. Feel free to share your own advice. Click here to see more top rated comments.

Yeah, New York is a different animal. It is pretty fucking gross. Like, really gross.

I was a little turned off when I moved here, but every day I spend in New York I like it more. I know it's cliche but New York is just full of vibrant, interesting people, and I think that a lot of bankers don't get exposed to that because they spend all their free time in Wall Street bars drinking w/ other bankers.

Here's my advice if you're in New York:

1. Don't worry about living close to work. You're going to take black cars home every night, and even if you live pretty far away, it's still not going to take long to get to/from work on the subway. Believe me. Chose a nice, quiet neighborhood w/ good bars. Make sure you have a good neighborhood bar. This is key.

2. Get roommates. Believe me, you will get a lot more bang for your buck. Even just 1 roommate if you want. 2 bedrooms are way nicer than 1 bedrooms and studios.

3. MAKE FRIENDS WITH NON BANKERS. Be sure to stay in touch with friends from school and your hometown that are not in finance. Believe me, this is very important because they have a lot more time off than you do, and they will know all the cool hole in the wall spots that you don't have the time to find. It's a life hack. It keeps you sane, and honestly, you will spend plenty of time drinking with bankers don't worry. They're pretty much all alcoholics, even the little Asian girls from Harvard. It's really easy to turn in to sort of the "prototypical broey banker," and putting off that vibe is going to turn a lot of people off to you. Also IT IS EXTREMELY DIFFICULT TO GET YOUR PENIS TOUCHED IF YOU GO OUT WITH A BIG GROUP OF MALE BANKERS. It's super easy to get laid in NYC if you go out with non bankers. Post financial crisis, a group of 3 or more bankers are going to have trouble closing. Period.

4. Meet people in the entertainment/restaurant industry. New York is all about creating a little village for yourself in the city. You want to have bars that know your drink and restaurants that know your name. It just makes everything a hell of a lot more fun. Nothing drops panties faster than being the guy in the back room blowing lines w/ a classy bar's owner. You accomplish this by going out, tipping well, and making conversation. Also I suggest going out alone from time to time, especially in your neighborhood. I know it's a bit intimidating at first, but shit, if you get off work before midnight, stop by your neighborhood bar, grab a beer, and talk to the bartender. I did this just b/c I'm an alcoholic, but I've made a lot of valuable friends as a result.

5. Don't be judgemental. Bankers can be very judgemental, and a lot of them are sort of goody-goody nerdy types. This doesn't work very well in NYC. Do drugs. Especially cocaine. Believe me. You know how America runs on Dunkin? NYC runs on blow.

6. Obviously make sure you do good work. Don't have too much fun.

Comments (69)

Apr 3, 2013

Could anyone post their thoughts on dorm v. sublet housing for SA's coming to New York for the summer?

I'm curious to hear the WSO community's thoughts.

Apr 3, 2013

It sounds really cool. Any more advice on finding apartments?

Apr 3, 2013

It sounds really cool. Any more advice on finding apartments?

Offer your firstborn to satan.

Apr 3, 2013

REAL ADVICE: you should hate cokeheads, they're the most unreliable group of people you'll ever run with. Period.

ALSO: wanna fuck random girls you meet in bars? be ready to get an STD, I don't have any close friends who haven't got one from doing this, myself included. It sucks, it's embarrassing. At least know someone sober before putting it in them.

My drinkin' problem left today, she packed up all her bags and walked away.

Apr 3, 2013
Kenny Powers:

REAL ADVICE: you should hate cokeheads, they're the most unreliable group of people you'll ever run with. Period.

ALSO: wanna fuck random girls you meet in bars? be ready to get an STD, I don't have any close friends who haven't got one from doing this, myself included. It sucks, it's embarrassing. At least know someone sober before putting it in them.

Hmmmmm doesn't sound like the real Kenny Powers.

He speaks the truth.

Apr 3, 2013
Cookies With Milken:
Kenny Powers:

REAL ADVICE: you should hate cokeheads, they're the most unreliable group of people you'll ever run with. Period.

ALSO: wanna fuck random girls you meet in bars? be ready to get an STD, I don't have any close friends who haven't got one from doing this, myself included. It sucks, it's embarrassing. At least know someone sober before putting it in them.

Hmmmmm doesn't sound like the real Kenny Powers.

He speaks the truth.

Oh yea...I mean, STEVIE! get the pussy mobile fired up we're gonna look for some big titty Puerto Ricans in Jew York.

But in all seriousness...that's real advice

My drinkin' problem left today, she packed up all her bags and walked away.

Apr 4, 2013
Cookies With Milken:
Kenny Powers:

REAL ADVICE: you should hate cokeheads, they're the most unreliable group of people you'll ever run with. Period.

ALSO: wanna fuck random girls you meet in bars? be ready to get an STD, I don't have any close friends who haven't got one from doing this, myself included. It sucks, it's embarrassing. At least know someone sober before putting it in them.

Hmmmmm doesn't sound like the real Kenny Powers.

He speaks the truth.

I couldn't stop laughing at this post (not the std part) and the reply.... thanks guys

Apr 4, 2013
Kenny Powers:

ALSO: wanna fuck random girls you meet in bars? be ready to get an STD, I don't have any close friends who haven't got one from doing this, myself included. It sucks, it's embarrassing. At least know someone sober before putting it in them.

Although to be fair this is going to happen in any city if you are poking randoms.

Apr 4, 2013
greengohome:
Kenny Powers:

ALSO: wanna fuck random girls you meet in bars? be ready to get an STD, I don't have any close friends who haven't got one from doing this, myself included. It sucks, it's embarrassing. At least know someone sober before putting it in them.

Although to be fair this is going to happen in any city if you are poking randoms.

True, but it's going to happen a lot if you're fucking girls in NYC who are 'impressed by the fact that you're doing coke with the owner of the bar you're at'

My drinkin' problem left today, she packed up all her bags and walked away.

Apr 4, 2013
Kenny Powers:

REAL ADVICE: you should hate cokeheads, they're the most unreliable group of people you'll ever run with. Period.

ALSO: wanna fuck random girls you meet in bars? be ready to get an STD, I don't have any close friends who haven't got one from doing this, myself included. It sucks, it's embarrassing. At least know someone sober before putting it in them.

I, as hypocritical as it may seem, think Kenny Powers is correct in many ways and don't think you guys should throw away his advice. Being a drug user will, in a very real way, make you a shittier emloyee. And yes, if you spend your weekends high as a kite, you're going to be unreliable. That's the nature of the beast.

It's kind of a personal choice I guess. If you try to party like a rock star and do the banking thing at the same time, you're walking a very very fine line and it's easy to slip over the edge. The way I see it, I deliver what's needed from me to get my check and cover my ass, but if I go above and beyond and start to sacrifice my personal life so I'm closer to the ideal of what the bank expects of me, then what's the point of the whole endeaver? I'm here to do my job, get paid, and use that check to do what I do. But that's sort of an opinion that inherently embraces mediocrity. If you want to grow up to be Jamie Dimon or something, then yeah, you can't really party.

I mean - this is your life, do what works. I agree with Kenny that cokeheads don't end up running banks. There's a whole mess of other ways to get paid in this world though, and ultimately, a lot more people leave the industry because it's fucking up their personal life than get pushed out because of drugs. If you can keep a rewarding personal life while delivering at work... that's half the battle.

And it doesn't have to be drugs or sex or whatever - just don't lose yourself in the grind. That's how you burn out, and it doesn't help anyone. If you're a good analyst, you'd be shocked how hard it is to replace you. We want you to stay, I just can't as your boss keep your personal life in order. A kid that knows the business and keeps himself sane though - that's a fast track to MD.

    • 1
Apr 3, 2013

Can we just drink pepsi instead? Most places don't even have coke.

Apr 4, 2013

IMO, no city compares with NYC. period. you don't live there because of how clean the streets are, rather because of the aura of living in The Big Apple. only downside to me is living expense which can add up fast. just my $.02...

Apr 4, 2013
azwethinkweiz:

IMO, no city compares with NYC. period. you don't live there because of how clean the streets are, rather because of the aura of living in The Big Apple. only downside to me is living expense which can add up fast. just my $.02...

Spoken like a true American hero. You've never left the United States, have you?

Apr 4, 2013

been all around europe

Apr 4, 2013
azwethinkweiz:

been all around europe

...yet still you believe in "the aura" of New York City? Good on you, my friend.

Apr 4, 2013

I want to move to NYC, just a shame it wld be a backwards step in my career at the moment

Apr 4, 2013

What's the difference? If you're a banking analyst, your shiny Ferragamos will barely touch the concrete on the way back and forth between your cube and your bed. And the financial district is cleaner than many cities. If you go off the beaten path, you'll get some grime, but such is life. You'll figure out which districts you like and which you don't.

As for the Puff Daddy wannabes, you deal with them in the same way they deal with you: don't start anything. It's not as if they're going to grab you and rub their ghetto cooties off on you or anything.

Also, I've seen plenty of analysts in Timberlands and black North Face parkas. I didn't know Puff Daddy had come to stand for mainstream suburban pseudo-fashion? What are you trying to say?

Apr 4, 2013

this fucker is so lame, stay in kansas bitch

Apr 4, 2013

"this fucker is so lame, stay in kansas bitch"

you're hilarious.... short man syndrome.

Apr 4, 2013
ssd82:

as well as how do you deal with the seemingly homeless puff daddy wannabe's in Timberlands and North Face Parka's (usually in black) trolling your city?

Thoughts appreciated?

ignorance is truly incurable

Apr 4, 2013

NYC is a great city, but sometimes the random smells are unbearable.

Apr 4, 2013

i'm from sydney not kansas so relax. i wasn't disrespecting your city, no shit it's a great place... but i was wondering about what you guys think of its dirtiness.

Apr 4, 2013

but I can think of a ton of places I would rather live.

And yes, it is dirty, but then so are most American cities.

Apr 4, 2013

I'm from Canada and I had the same feelings when I interned in nyc for the first time. I found it pretty dirty and smelly (coming from Canada, that is). But it has its own benefits as well.

All in all nyc is pretty nice - big apple has a charm of its own, no wonder I took the full-time offer.

Apr 4, 2013

as someone who grew up in new york, and has lived in no less than 6 other american states, i can say that it is by bar none the greatest city in the US...dirtiness or no dirtiness.

Apr 4, 2013

Lived here for a long time and NY is a good city. Compared to other international centers, though, NY is much dirtier and decrepit. The upper east side, parts of the upper west side, parts of mid-town (eg, Time Warner center), and the complexes downtown are up to par, but on average, the city leaves much to be desired for residential quality. Unfortunately, these areas are pretty pricy for younger people. It's not uncommon to see people with roommates. Many also commute from Jersey or the other Boroughs.

NY has great facilities of culture, but I'm not sure how they compare to other cities. Pretty irrelevant for me. I'm happy with a good (clean/new) movie theater with IMAX. Sitting next to the above mentioned denizens is sometimes a different issue, though.

The restaurants here are very good. Lots of 3 star Michelin picks (more than all of Italy, I've been told). Prices aren't bad either (except Masa and Per Se). Night life is also OK, but personal safety is apparently a somewhat bigger issue here than in Europe or Asia.

Like anywhere else (maybe except Singapore), there are good parts and bad parts of town. NY just leans more towards the latter. For some, though, dirty and decrepit has a charm all its own. East Village is a good example.

Apr 4, 2013

NYC is great place (to visit and party for a few days) IMO, but living in San Francisco has much higher quality of life, more things to do, and most importantly, people who are much easier to deal with.

Also, the weather is horrible in NYC and you are essentially trapped on that island. I-bankers do not work nearly as many hours on the west coast. The bonuses are not as large (still get paid well), but the piece of mind is worth it.

I can get to the marin headlands in 10 minutes, the ocean in 20 minutes, and skiing in tahoe in 3 hours.

BTW I grew up in NYC area and am happy that my family lives elsewhere now (Colorado).

Apr 4, 2013

a good place to visit and party, but that's it. I'd much rather live in SF. Some people in NYC are very snobby and pretentious as well. Lot of girls think very highly of themselves when in reality they're the white trash that's found in most parts of the country. However, just cause they live in the city, they think that makes them better.

I think quality of life is better in other large cities in America such as Chicago and SF Bay Area.

Apr 4, 2013

seriously, I can't remember the last time I went out of Manhattan island (other than going to JFK or LGA)

Apr 4, 2013

You're right, the city can get a bit dirty, that's because it's gotten too crowded and there are too many poor people.....there needs to be another plague...It is still better than most cities though, by far the best in the States.

SF is for old people, it's too low energy, plus the bars/clubs close at 2 AM

LA is just wierd, it's too disconnected and there way too many Mexicans, plus the same early closing time problem

Chicago is probably the best alternative, the weather is even more extreme though, plus it's really small and you're in the fuckin' midwest for Chrissakes

Some of the complaints are legit though, not too much to do outside the island, the broads are way too uppity in NYC, it's dirty etc

Only viable alternative is the West Coast and the only advantage there is that Vegas is a short drive from most places.

Apr 4, 2013
Seanc:

LA is just wierd, it's too disconnected and there way too many Mexicans

That's funny :-)

I agree LA is a little weird, too many "industry" wannabes, boring. I think the opposite though... there's way too many Asians. Asians here, there, everywhere! (Nothing against asians though, peace).

The appeal of the west coast, at least to me, is you're a car drive away from San Diego, San Francisco, Coronado, Carmel, Big Bear, Lake Tahoe, Las Vegas, Santa Barbara, Napa, Sonoma, beaches etc. Each weekend could be a "mini" vacation.

Remember, I'm originaly from Chicago, so this is a nice alternative. No more f'n below zero windchill.

New York? 'eh don't want it, don't need it, 3 days max and I'm outta there.

Apr 4, 2013

have you ever been to NYC before you call it dirty. I mean bro its a fucking city, its going to be dirty. Its a real, raw, big city,an perhaps the most famous in the world. So dont you think that all the good things abot the city might cancel out the fact that it has dirt and (oh my God) black people ahhhh! your a pretty ignorant fuck, because that is one dumb fucking question. DO you think anybody is going to say oh yes I love dirt, it doesn't bother me! NO bitch! people hate the dirt, but there are clean parts of the city, full of nice restaurants, parks, clubs, gyms, sports, shows, all the best in the world. But if dirt and black people bother you, maybe you should work 1950's, or perhaps just NOT IN NYC!!! their is plenty of waspy hedge funds in nice clean suburbs. there is also citys all over the world with banks. Europe is good if you are looking ot avoid black people, but your going to be stuck with Jews wherever you go ( I know I know ).

perhaps if one hates water they shouldn't take up swimming.

P.S. Dont send me anymore lame PMs about how your will destroy me. It does not get much more lame that internet threats.so stop being such a bitch. And if you dont want people to be mena, than dont ask such dumb ignorant questions.

Give your mom my love

Apr 4, 2013
BEAR_eats_BULL:

have you ever been to NYC before you call it dirty. I mean bro its a fucking city, its going to be dirty. Its a real, raw, big city,an perhaps the most famous in the world. So dont you think that all the good things abot the city might cancel out the fact that it has dirt and (oh my God) black people ahhhh! your a pretty ignorant fuck, because that is one dumb fucking question. DO you think anybody is going to say oh yes I love dirt, it doesn't bother me! NO bitch! people hate the dirt, but there are clean parts of the city, full of nice restaurants, parks, clubs, gyms, sports, shows, all the best in the world. But if dirt and black people bother you, maybe you should work 1950's, or perhaps just NOT IN NYC!!! their is plenty of waspy hedge funds in nice clean suburbs. there is also citys all over the world with banks. Europe is good if you are looking ot avoid black people, but your going to be stuck with Jews wherever you go ( I know I know ).

perhaps if one hates water they shouldn't take up swimming.

P.S. Dont send me anymore lame PMs about how your will destroy me. It does not get much more lame that internet threats.so stop being such a bitch. And if you dont want people to be mena, than dont ask such dumb ignorant questions.

Give your mom my love

I was in nyc this past weekend you idiot. My thoughts were not racist, rather observational, nor were they disrespectful of your city. You can't offer any insight but defensive and arrogant rebutals as to the 'greatness' of your city. My PM comment was based on the fact you're a dumbass who needs to be told in private to cool it down. So relax you lowlife.

Apr 4, 2013
BEAR_eats_BULL:

have you ever been to NYC before you call it dirty. I mean bro its a fucking city, its going to be dirty. Its a real, raw, big city,an perhaps the most famous in the world. So dont you think that all the good things abot the city might cancel out the fact that it has dirt and (oh my God) black people ahhhh! your a pretty ignorant fuck, because that is one dumb fucking question. DO you think anybody is going to say oh yes I love dirt, it doesn't bother me! NO bitch! people hate the dirt, but there are clean parts of the city, full of nice restaurants, parks, clubs, gyms, sports, shows, all the best in the world. But if dirt and black people bother you, maybe you should work 1950's, or perhaps just NOT IN NYC!!! their is plenty of waspy hedge funds in nice clean suburbs. there is also citys all over the world with banks. Europe is good if you are looking ot avoid black people, but your going to be stuck with Jews wherever you go ( I know I know ).

perhaps if one hates water they shouldn't take up swimming.

P.S. Dont send me anymore lame PMs about how your will destroy me. It does not get much more lame that internet threats.so stop being such a bitch. And if you dont want people to be mena, than dont ask such dumb ignorant questions.

Give your mom my love

hahahaha fucking hilarious

Apr 4, 2013

It is definitely a city you fall in love with. It is like an overpowering, overwhelming, and incredibly addicting drug...and once you taste it, you feel there is NOWHERE else that can give you the same beautiful thing: anything you want, anytime you want it, anywhere you are.

Apr 4, 2013

And like some drugs, certain people (like myself) will loathe it powerfully from first dose.

I do wish I could experience it like that, Mika. If I had a little more money and a little more time, perhaps I could. For now, though, it's nothing more than an overseer that holds a really big whip.

Apr 4, 2013

and new york is the rome of our time.

The future is elsewhere. Let Nero play his fiddle.

Apr 5, 2013
Alexey Kirilov:

and new york is the rome of our time.

The future is elsewhere. Let Nero play his fiddle.

You must be an English major, because that shit was poetic.

Totally unfounded and incorrect, but the imagery, oh man
EDIT: Wtf, when I responded to BABanker it says I'm quoting some random russian username

Apr 4, 2013

People have been saying the same stuff for decades, London sucks and will never replace New York, the rest of the competing cities are too poor, crowded or don't speak English.

Apr 5, 2013

NYC is probably one of the cleanest big cities out there. You avoid the puff daddy wannabe's by doing just that - avoiding them. Original poster is a dumbass.

Apr 5, 2013

I second NoTears with the addendum that New York is not "my city" or "his city" or really anyone's city, so parka-wearing Puff Daddies can troll it at will.

If you don't like people wearing North Face parkas and Timberlands, I suggest you run screaming in the other direction every time you see one. That should be highly amusing.

Apr 5, 2013

NYC smells like garbage....

I think they wait too long between pickups, or something.

My wife is from Great Neck and even she likes it better down here in DC.

We might move up there after my MBA for work reasons, although I'd just as soon snag something relatively comparable here.

I like NYC, but I'm not sure I'd want to live in the area. I would never entertain living in Manhattan because I like to have property, and the only other places I'd want to live (Westchester, Westport, Greenwich) are quite a commute, IMO (by wussy DC commute standards, wherein half an hour is unacceptably long).

I like visiting though.

Apr 5, 2013

I was just curious, what is the average cost of living in NYC.

Apr 5, 2013

Who cares. Survival of the fittest. The dirt/germs/chlamydia will just strengthen your immune system.

Apr 5, 2013
Patrick Bateman:

NYC is a great city, but sometimes the random smells are unbearable.

Now I'm aroused at the thought of random smells.

"Mr. Perkins poses an extreme risk to the market when drunk."

Apr 5, 2013
aadpepsi:
Seanc:

LA is just wierd, it's too disconnected and there way too many Mexicans

That's funny :-)

I agree LA is a little weird, too many "industry" wannabes, boring. I think the opposite though... there's way too many Asians. Asians here, there, everywhere! (Nothing against asians though, peace).

The appeal of the west coast, at least to me, is you're a car drive away from San Diego, San Francisco, Coronado, Carmel, Big Bear, Lake Tahoe, Las Vegas, Santa Barbara, Napa, Sonoma, beaches etc. Each weekend could be a "mini" vacation.

Remember, I'm originaly from Chicago, so this is a nice alternative. No more f'n below zero windchill.

New York? 'eh don't want it, don't need it, 3 days max and I'm outta there.

What did you do with your pea coats bruh?

"Mr. Perkins poses an extreme risk to the market when drunk."

Apr 3, 2013

I won't diss coke too much, because it's fun to do sometimes. But if you ever hang out with friends doing coke and don't partake, you will see them saying more words about meaningless bullshit than anyone you have ever seen.

Keep this in mind if you ever want to pick up a girl who's semi-sober and not on coke.

Apr 5, 2013

5, 6, 9, 15, 23 are spot on.

Apr 5, 2013

This list makes no sense to native New Yorkers. Isn't this how everyone lives? #17 especially bothers me. I can't fall asleep in the suburbs or places outside of the city. The silence is deafening, creepy, and keeps me awake all night.

Apr 5, 2013
MRCR:

This list makes no sense to native New Yorkers. Isn't this how everyone lives? #17 especially bothers me. I can't fall asleep in the suburbs or places outside of the city. The silence is deafening, creepy, and keeps me awake all night.

Lol, that's what a white noise machine is for:

www.amazon.com/Marpac-Dohm-DS-Speed-Sound-Conditio...

Apr 5, 2013

#17 x1000

My first year out of school I didn't go back to visit my family in the burbs much (they came into the city most of the time). I took a long weekend in the late summer and this was the first thing I noticed. Couldn't imagine how that would have felt if I did that during the dead silence of a suburban winter night. creeeeepy

Apr 5, 2013

#24 : When you go on vacation, you spend more time talking shit about how the place you're visiting isn't like New York than on actually enjoying your vacation.

#25 : You still think New York is the greatest place on earth, even if you've never lived anywhere else.

Metal. Music. Life. www.headofmetal.com

Apr 5, 2013

Crazy how accustomed to the city we've become. While living in Shanghai I had a roommate going crazy about how he couldn't sleep due to all the noise. To me it was peaceful lol.

Apr 3, 2013

How did this become a thread about the merits of cocaine usage..?

Apr 3, 2013

Celebrate to elevate. The city don't sleep and neither can you. Keep up bro, don't slow. Coke is a fact of life. Remember that sleepover in 7th grade when you told your friend you weren't going to get drunk in high school? Boom chicka boom. It happened, and soon you were having unprotected sex on your parents pool table. Remember? Relax, NYC's gonna be great. Get out and meet the peeps. EV and Lower and you're slaying like Shinobi.

Apr 3, 2013

"Do Drugs. Especially Cocaine." LOL

Float like a butterfly, sting like the bee.

Apr 3, 2013

I fucking love this guy. Easily one of the best posters on WSO right now.

Apr 3, 2013

the best part was #5 lol

Apr 3, 2013

+1 on getting a roommate. I'm getting raped for a 1br. You can get in some quality buildings by going the 2br route.

Apr 4, 2013

+SB, keep writing!

Please don't quote Patrick Bateman.

Apr 4, 2013

Awesome reading this getting ready to come in as a SA

Apr 4, 2013
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JJ

Apr 4, 2013

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