Wall Street Vices

Gold Man Sack's picture
Rank: Baboon | banana points 160

Wall Streeters have a reputation for being a dysfunctional lot, but from my experience, either the stories about non-stop-ragers and drug-infused-excess are greatly exaggerated or the culture of the business is significantly tamer than it once was. It seems cocaine and hookers have been replaced by dating sites and yoga (bonus funny video about guys who do yoga), and I, for one, feel cheated. Was it all a lie or are we just late to the party?

One explanation is that post-meltdown Wall Street is under a microscope and everyone in the business knows they better act like model effing citizens at all times as part of some unspoken concerted PR campaign, but that explanation presumes willpower; a quality noticeably absent among the mythological Wall Streeters of old.

Another explanation is that the crazy party lie has been secretly perpetrated and circulated by The Man in order to lure unsuspecting college grads to a life of 80 hour work weeks on a never ending quest for unimaginable earthly pleasures.

Or maybe, just maybe, with some time and a bit more elbow grease you will be admitted into the inner circle. You will be summoned out of the blue to partake in an ungodly ritual where women of questionable morality will feed you grapes while you lay reclined, tempting fate and scoffing at the choking hazard presented by this luxurious scenario.
Eat it up buddy, that's just what they want you to think...

Comments (34)

Jul 22, 2010

Maybe it has something to do with most "Wall Streeters" being huge nerds...

Jul 22, 2010
Sojourner:

Maybe it has something to do with most "Wall Streeters" being huge nerds...

haha true, but thats what im saying! youd never know it from the way theyre portrayed in the media. where does that coked up sexual deviant image of wall street come from?

Jul 22, 2010

fundamental lifestyle and personality differences between bankers and traders

Jul 22, 2010

I think the new generation of Wall Streeters are definitely huge nerds, that's why the hookers and coke culture has faded. At least that's my guess.

Jul 23, 2010

SAC is absolutely correct. The wildest times were before the Internet. Once the Internet came on line, the quants took over and nerd culture permeated every aspect of the Street.

Ahh....the stories I could tell. But the whole culture has changed. Case in point: a buddy of mine was getting married and when I showed up for the bachelor party, there was an individual bindle of coke on the table for everyone in attendance. Shit quickly spiraled out of control (in Vegas), with everyone trying to one-up everyone else. I remember being at the craps table surrounded by mid-Westerners when another buddy stumbled up and shouted, "Dude, somebody's gotta pay for those whores upstairs!".

The bachelor is now a respected hedge fund manager that runs a stable of quants who wouldn't know cocaine from baby powder. That's not necessarily a bad thing, but the culture has definitely changed.

Jul 23, 2010
Edmundo Braverman:

...when another buddy stumbled up and shouted, "Dude, somebody's gotta pay for those whores upstairs!".

The bachelor is now a respected hedge fund manager that runs a stable of quants who wouldn't know cocaine from baby powder. That's not necessarily a bad thing, but the culture has definitely changed.

That's absolutely a GOOD thing. Patrons of prostitutes and cocaine are juvenile, deleterious and morally deficient.

It is resolutely GOOD that old Wall Street culture dies out.

"The American father is never seen in London. He passes his life entirely in Wall Street and communicates with his family once a month by means of a telegram in cipher." - Oscar Wilde

Jul 23, 2010
veritas14:

That's absolutely a GOOD thing. Patrons of prostitutes and cocaine are juvenile, deleterious and morally deficient.

It is resolutely GOOD that old Wall Street culture dies out.

Hours of LAN parties, comic conventions, and nerddom is deleterious towards an individual as well - you're slowly stripped of social ability and become more in tune with internet memes and WoW characters. I'd rather see Wall Street pursue hordes of hos than hordes of Chaos Knights.

Jul 25, 2010
KilgoreT:
veritas14:

That's absolutely a GOOD thing. Patrons of prostitutes and cocaine are juvenile, deleterious and morally deficient.

It is resolutely GOOD that old Wall Street culture dies out.

Hours of LAN parties, comic conventions, and nerddom is deleterious towards an individual as well - you're slowly stripped of social ability and become more in tune with internet memes and WoW characters. I'd rather see Wall Street pursue hordes of hos than hordes of Chaos Knights.

I've never been on a LAN party, to a comiccon or been considered a nerd. I would not consider that subculture to be an appropriate alternative to the halcyon coke-days on the street.

Intelligence, ethical decisions and professionalism. Simple principles.

"The American father is never seen in London. He passes his life entirely in Wall Street and communicates with his family once a month by means of a telegram in cipher." - Oscar Wilde

Jul 25, 2010
veritas14:
KilgoreT:
veritas14:

That's absolutely a GOOD thing. Patrons of prostitutes and cocaine are juvenile, deleterious and morally deficient.

It is resolutely GOOD that old Wall Street culture dies out.

Hours of LAN parties, comic conventions, and nerddom is deleterious towards an individual as well - you're slowly stripped of social ability and become more in tune with internet memes and WoW characters. I'd rather see Wall Street pursue hordes of hos than hordes of Chaos Knights.

I've never been on a LAN party, to a comiccon or been considered a nerd. I would not consider that subculture to be an appropriate alternative to the halcyon coke-days on the street.

Intelligence, ethical decisions and professionalism. Simple principles.

you're such a pussy lol.

Jul 26, 2010
veritas14:
KilgoreT:
veritas14:

That's absolutely a GOOD thing. Patrons of prostitutes and cocaine are juvenile, deleterious and morally deficient.

It is resolutely GOOD that old Wall Street culture dies out.

Hours of LAN parties, comic conventions, and nerddom is deleterious towards an individual as well - you're slowly stripped of social ability and become more in tune with internet memes and WoW characters. I'd rather see Wall Street pursue hordes of hos than hordes of Chaos Knights.

I've never been on a LAN party, to a comiccon or been considered a nerd. I would not consider that subculture to be an appropriate alternative to the halcyon coke-days on the street.

Intelligence, ethical decisions and professionalism. Simple principles.

Do you work in HR?

Jul 27, 2010
proforma:
veritas14:
KilgoreT:
veritas14:

That's absolutely a GOOD thing. Patrons of prostitutes and cocaine are juvenile, deleterious and morally deficient.

It is resolutely GOOD that old Wall Street culture dies out.

Hours of LAN parties, comic conventions, and nerddom is deleterious towards an individual as well - you're slowly stripped of social ability and become more in tune with internet memes and WoW characters. I'd rather see Wall Street pursue hordes of hos than hordes of Chaos Knights.

I've never been on a LAN party, to a comiccon or been considered a nerd. I would not consider that subculture to be an appropriate alternative to the halcyon coke-days on the street.

Intelligence, ethical decisions and professionalism. Simple principles.

Do you work in HR?

Are you an eternal frat boy?

"The American father is never seen in London. He passes his life entirely in Wall Street and communicates with his family once a month by means of a telegram in cipher." - Oscar Wilde

Jul 27, 2010

Are you homosex?

Jul 27, 2010
veritas14:
proforma:
veritas14:
KilgoreT:
veritas14:

That's absolutely a GOOD thing. Patrons of prostitutes and cocaine are juvenile, deleterious and morally deficient.

It is resolutely GOOD that old Wall Street culture dies out.

Hours of LAN parties, comic conventions, and nerddom is deleterious towards an individual as well - you're slowly stripped of social ability and become more in tune with internet memes and WoW characters. I'd rather see Wall Street pursue hordes of hos than hordes of Chaos Knights.

I've never been on a LAN party, to a comiccon or been considered a nerd. I would not consider that subculture to be an appropriate alternative to the halcyon coke-days on the street.

Intelligence, ethical decisions and professionalism. Simple principles.

Do you work in HR?

Are you an eternal frat boy?

Haha I was asking a serious question. I'm not going to get in an argument on the Internet but I'll let you know that I despise frat boys.

Jul 27, 2010
proforma:
veritas14:
proforma:
veritas14:
KilgoreT:
veritas14:

That's absolutely a GOOD thing. Patrons of prostitutes and cocaine are juvenile, deleterious and morally deficient.

It is resolutely GOOD that old Wall Street culture dies out.

Hours of LAN parties, comic conventions, and nerddom is deleterious towards an individual as well - you're slowly stripped of social ability and become more in tune with internet memes and WoW characters. I'd rather see Wall Street pursue hordes of hos than hordes of Chaos Knights.

I've never been on a LAN party, to a comiccon or been considered a nerd. I would not consider that subculture to be an appropriate alternative to the halcyon coke-days on the street.

Intelligence, ethical decisions and professionalism. Simple principles.

Do you work in HR?

Are you an eternal frat boy?

Haha I was asking a serious question. I'm not going to get in an argument on the Internet but I'll let you know that I despise frat boys.

No, I'm not in HR. Structured products sales.

"The American father is never seen in London. He passes his life entirely in Wall Street and communicates with his family once a month by means of a telegram in cipher." - Oscar Wilde

Jul 23, 2010
veritas14:
Edmundo Braverman:

...when another buddy stumbled up and shouted, "Dude, somebody's gotta pay for those whores upstairs!".

The bachelor is now a respected hedge fund manager that runs a stable of quants who wouldn't know cocaine from baby powder. That's not necessarily a bad thing, but the culture has definitely changed.

That's absolutely a GOOD thing. Patrons of prostitutes and cocaine are juvenile, deleterious and morally deficient.

It is resolutely GOOD that old Wall Street culture dies out.

Veritas if I had monkey shit to throw at you I would

Aug 5, 2010

Does this guy remind anyone else of the South Park San Francisco characters?

Veritas, do you drive a hybrid?

Jul 23, 2010
Edmundo Braverman:

SAC is absolutely correct. The wildest times were before the Internet. Once the Internet came on line, the quants took over and nerd culture permeated every aspect of the Street.

Ahh....the stories I could tell. But the whole culture has changed. Case in point: a buddy of mine was getting married and when I showed up for the bachelor party, there was an individual bindle of coke on the table for everyone in attendance. Shit quickly spiraled out of control (in Vegas), with everyone trying to one-up everyone else. I remember being at the craps table surrounded by mid-Westerners when another buddy stumbled up and shouted, "Dude, somebody's gotta pay for those whores upstairs!".

The bachelor is now a respected hedge fund manager that runs a stable of quants who wouldn't know cocaine from baby powder. That's not necessarily a bad thing, but the culture has definitely changed.

That's amazing lol

Jul 23, 2010

But if analysts aren't snorting blow, and shelling out hundreds of dollars a night on hookers, then where are they getting their fix?....Comic conventions? LAN parties?

You know you've been working too hard when you stop dreaming about bottles of champagne and hordes of naked women, and start dreaming about conditional formatting and circular references.

Jul 23, 2010
Zweihander:

But if analysts aren't snorting blow, and shelling out hundreds of dollars a night on hookers, then where are they getting their fix?....Comic conventions? LAN parties?

LAN parties are great. But actually you can mix that with more traditionnal "fixes". LAN parties when you're drunk and/or high are great. Oh, but you meant analysts, which I suppose refers more to bankers than traders. Bankers are more knowledgeable about Ferragamo ties but know nothing of the LAN pleasures.

Jul 24, 2010
Zweihander:

But if analysts aren't snorting blow, and shelling out hundreds of dollars a night on hookers, then where are they getting their fix?....Comic conventions? LAN parties?

In the shower?

Aug 6, 2010
Zweihander:

But if analysts aren't snorting blow, and shelling out hundreds of dollars a night on hookers, then where are they getting their fix?....Comic conventions? LAN parties?

World of Warcraft. Nuff said.

The best man always wins.

Oct 31, 2011

edit

Jul 23, 2010

Wall St. went public is what happened. Degrading women, smoking cigars at your desk, dropping F bombs like there is no tomorrow, that sh*t went out the window once the partnerships went public and there were shareholders to answer to. Aside from the shareholders, when you are trying to build a global business, it is a bit uncomfortable to explain why there are 3 suits pending over managers grabbing secretaries asses.

I also think a lot of this stuff has gone underground- as in the next morning there is just a silent nod as you pass each other in the hall rather than a 20 minute out loud retelling of the night to the whole desk. There are two guys that are well known for their love of strippers and prosties on my desk, and they went to AC last weekend, and they wouldn't tell me a thing that happened the whole weekend- even after a friend showed an incriminating photo of one of these guys walking into a whorehouse. I am relatively new so I may not be in the "circle of trust," but even so, there was no word at all from these guys. I am near certain our head of product development is a cokehead. I found out he was 29 last week and that fat faced bloated f***er looks like he is going on 40. I personally believe that you can only become so big of an asshole without the use of drugs, and this guy goes way beyond that threshold.

The rise of the quant types on the street has probably calmed things down too. In the 80's Wall st was a bunch of beer slugging suburban white guys who didn't really expect much out of life and were born in the NY metro area. Looking around, myself and three others grew up around NYC. The other 20 or so in my area up all around the country, and many weren't born in the US. Nearly all have come for the money and with dreams of wearing suits that were more expensive than their first car. I am highly unusual in that I went to a state school, looking down the row, there is a Wharton, MIT, Columbia, SUNY(me), Yale, and another wharton, and a third of them have technical degrees, not business degrees.

Things are just different now. I personally wish I got to experience the pre-IPO version of wall street, though that had its own problems- favoritism and racism being among them.

Jul 23, 2010

@veritas14 Say what you will about us beer-swilling, whoremongering cokeheads, but we never blew the fucking world economy up. It took moralizing nerds to pull that one off.

Jul 23, 2010
Edmundo Braverman:

@veritas14 Say what you will about us beer-swilling, whoremongering cokeheads, but we never blew the fucking world economy up. It took moralizing nerds to pull that one off.

Actually, it was people exactly like your formerly coke swilling hedge fund manager that were responsible for this mess The quants are just cogs.

It's not just Wallstreet though, most fields are only becomign more competitive, achievement driven, and serious. This is in contrast to general culture, which becomes more skanky all the time.

Its really just sad to me how hard traders nowadays try to act cool - a trick they can only pull off b/c everyone around them is ultra nerdy. The average person would never for a second mistake any of these people for anything but calculator programming math competing ivy league nerds.

That being said, the average person is an idiot and I wouldn't want to work with them. If only we could be nerds at work and animals outside it. Reminds me of song line:

"I want a lady in the street but a freak in the bed. YEAH!"

Jul 25, 2010
Edmundo Braverman:

@veritas14 Say what you will about us beer-swilling, whoremongering cokeheads, but we never blew the fucking world economy up. It took moralizing nerds to pull that one off.

Personally, I blame the whoremongering cokehead politicians.

"The American father is never seen in London. He passes his life entirely in Wall Street and communicates with his family once a month by means of a telegram in cipher." - Oscar Wilde

Jul 23, 2010

It is interesting to see the differing opinions of replies to this thread

Jul 23, 2010

Wish I could have been on the street when all of this was allowed - it must have truly been living the life of kings!

Jul 23, 2010

this is a great discussion. Very insightful!

Jul 23, 2010

All of that great stuff still goes down, I have no clue where you clowns work.

Jul 24, 2010

It's self-feeding - the more PC and "HR-ized" things get, the more PC newer entrants like myself feel the need to act re: deviant behavior - regardless of what we might have been/done had we been in the eighties.

Jul 26, 2010

most people, especially 20-somethings, can't adopt "intelligence, ethical decisions and professionalism " as a mantra in their lives. they have to pick up one unhealthy habit or another, and since your career is a huge part of your life as a banker, that spills over into your professional life.

Jul 26, 2010
Jul 28, 2010