Hi Guys,
I currently attend a small liberal arts college and want to be an investment banker. I have been trading stocks since I was 12 so I know that I will be a really good i-banker. Some years my return is even over 10 percent!
I was just wondering what the hours are? Will I need to work over time, consistentally...because I like to have fun LOL
I heard there will be hair tests for the drug tests this year, is it true??!?
What type of suit should I wear to interviews, I have set aside $4,000 - Is this enough?
How long was it before girls started to like you? I hope I can get a trophy wife soon! MODELS AND BOTTLES BABY, am I right or what?
My GPA is 2.99, is it ok to round up to 3.0? Should I keep it at 2.99 so I feel more "real"
Anyways im trying to get into Gold man Sacks (man sacks, haha are they gay!), any advice. If you are a recruiter I have my resume written out, I'll type it up for you!
Thanks guys! sorry I am such a newbie monkey lol
.
try again.
Haha that post actually made me smile.
Not funny.
This can't be for real!
Very very classy, to answer the questions:
1. Its a strictly 9-5 job, you'll have a wonderful life
2. They do a hair test that can see into the future, so if you even think about using drugs they'll know
3. $4,000 is only enough if its a bespoke suit and some serious loafers. Don't forget you'll need another $5,000 for a decent watch though
4. Models and Bottles all the way, once you get that offer the girls get wet just hearing the words "Investment Banker"
5. Round that GPA down 2.9, makes your other stats look more impressive
6. Hand written is best, I like a lipstick resume on a bar napkin it shows true class
Bring you BSD pants
wow, a sternie WOULD consider that humor.
Sternmonkey just got owned.
what's funny about this post is that 90% of the messages on this forum contain one or more of those questions
I'm pretty sure that was the point of the original post. It was a joke.
i thought the kid was serious up til the first sentence. you find folks here all the time thinking they can dominate IB bc they trade on investopedia.
why would you waste your time even writing that?? nothing better to do?
What school do you go to?
I would suggest transferring. Contrary to common belief, most of the top firms like Gold man don’t even recruit at schools like Columbia, NYU, Harvard, Brown, MIT, etc. Investment banks look for undiscovered talent in the same way a portfolio manager looks for an under-covered stock. Transfer to a school in a state like Idaho or North Dakota or Nebraska. I’ve heard North Dakota State University has a great program.
Also, avoid networking. Most undergrads fail miserably when they try to network (they come across as socialites). Keep to yourself. Most bankers are very hardened, cold individuals. Don’t talk to anyone important, and you should be moving in the right direction.
Use the search feature for previous topics on clothing (I just posted a really good one the other day!).
Don’t do drugs and don’t drink. Bankers usually don’t do these things.
Just keep trying hard! There are plenty of jobs out there! The economy is great and we aren’t headed toward a recession at all!
Don't drop the r word f9. you'll scare the children.
Classic.....
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