How do I get over social anxiety/self-esteem issues for Investment Banking?

I want to have a career in IB, then MAYBE PE/HF, bit right now, im looking at a career in IB. However, I have two major caveats: I have a mild amount of social anxiety and self-esteem issues. Here's what I mean (and this is probably an incredibly toxic way of thinking, but its just how my mind operates and views "threats"): if I feel that someone is not as important, I won't feel a threat, so I wont get as scared. However, whenever I talk to an important person, say a family member who is a finance executive, I'll nearly shit my pants and have a very shaky voice. What can I do to fix this? Im in my senior year of high school, so I have four years to work on it. I am mainly scared for networking. My game plan is to talk/network with people at no-name boutiques in the middle of nowhere first to build some confidence, and then move on to the firms higher up on my list as I get more comfortable. However, there is one way I lose all of the anxiety. If I go into a call as if I don't fucking care at all and try to act ballsy, I stop over-thinking and getting nervous. However, I am scared that I would come off as someone who doesn't care, which is the last thing I would want while taking the time to talk to someone while networking/talking to a client in IB.

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This advice probably isn’t what you want to hear, but you’ve got to just keep talking to people and get more experience with it.

I went through the halfway point of college not being able to give a presentation without being short of breath and having a shaky voice, but once I had to give presentations fairly often, I gradually got better at it.

I think another experience that helped was doing my first internship. I did fairly well in the role, and I think that helped build my confidence a ton and remove some of my self doubt.

I think the idea of talking to places you aren’t really interested in is a good idea. It helps you get reps and understand the flow of these conversations.

As far as acting ballsy, I wouldn’t recommend it. Can only speak from the seeking an internship side of things, but I’d imagine the bankers want to talk to someone who’s genuinely interested and willing to learn. They probably don’t want to talk to some ignorant kid.

 

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