Investment Banks Ranked By Your Divorced Blue Collared Uncle

S+: 0 Clue you work in finance:
M Klein (Underwear Model), Blackstone (Grill Salesman), Lincoln (Car Dealership Manager), Campbell Luytens (Soup Maker)

S: REAL American Bank Branch Manager:
BofA, Citi, PNC, Citizens, KeyBank, Truist, 

A+: Evil American Bank Teller:
JPM, WF, JMP (confuses it with JPM)

A: Teller at less prestigious firm:
BMO, TD, Santander, RBC 

B+: 1% chance he heard of but has no fkn clue what u do:
Raymond James, DC Advisory (thinks Washington DC), SVB

B: No clue what u do, thinks you're talking about your friends:
William Blair, Harris Williams, Piper Sandler, Jefferies, Macquarie, Stephens, Zeiglers, Baird, Stifel, Solomon Partners, Tobin, Houlihan Lokey, PWP,  BGL, Ducera, Moelis, PJT, Allen, Gordan Dyal, Leerink, Janney, H.C Wrainwright, Lazard, Canaccord, Societe Generale, Duff & Phelps, Stout, B.Riley, Rabobank, Union Square, ING, Intrepid, Shea & Co, 

C+: Still doesn't know, wrote it off as overseas powertool knockoffs when you tried saying the full name:
MUFG, SMBC, Mizuho, HSBC, Nomura, 

C: Thinks your boss is an evil European Oligarch:
Barclays, Deutsche Bank (pronounces it 'Douche'), UBS 

D: Thinks this is your fortnite clan name (Thinks you're unemployed):
Evercore, Qatalyst, LionTree, Greenhill, Raine, Ardea, Axom, Centerview, Broadhaven, Howden Tiger, GP Bullhound, Eastdil Secured, Big 4, BlackArch

F+: Convinced you visited the island:
GS, MS, Rothschild, Rockefeller Capital, Cantor Fitzgerald, Oppenheimer, Guggenheim, (Obligatory Soros/BlackRock/Vanguard/StateStreet plug)