Investment Banker perception to non-finance people
Do you ever get the vibe that the average person thinks we are just bankers sitting in retail branches selling mutual funds?
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if only it were that good, people think I am a literal banker, i.e. I'm a banker teller handing people $20 bills in exchange for $100 dollar bills
Literally nobody outside of finance has any idea what investment banking is
Honestly most people just think I’m the guy that caused the GFC lol. Most people won’t know the difference between S&T, DCM, and M&A
I don't think anyone gives a shit about what we do.
["Average Person" to Bankers]
Why do you care?
Nobody really knows what bankers do and it’s generally viewed as less impressive than being a doctor or lawyer.
Well, it's less impressive than a doctor that's for sure, unless our classification of doctor is chiropractic ;)
Chiropractors aren’t doctors
One guy asked me to give him a competitive mortgage rate.
Why am I not remotely surprised by that
No, I think most people's perceptions are a dude sitting in an office 10 hours per week, making millions and spending it on drugs and booze.......oh yeah and we're also stealing money from the middle class somehow.
Well very indirectly, where do you think those M&A synergies come from? Certainly not out of the CEOs pocket
From my experience most people think it has something to do with stocks and investments.
I still don’t know what we do.
Retail banker or S&T would be to most common perceptions.
If you want prestige and to get laid, getting a BO role will do the job. Tell them the brand name of the bank and they will think that you go with a suit from conference room to conference room signing documents without even reading them - when in reality you are arranging pens by length and scanning.
When I was networking back in undergrad there were several profiles I came across that said "Analyst at BB" but then when you clicked it and read further they worked in like ops lol.
Most girls I dated are more impressed that I'm a politician (albeit not a high flying one). When I mentioned my IB/PE background, they either think I do something like CRE (because I mention "deals") or a literal teller. They're far more impressed that I'm a Rhodes Scholar and went to big name schools that has layman's prestige like Oxford and Wharton.
Did you jerk off while writing this comment?
I wouldve thought a Rhodes Scholar would be able to figure that out
Why are you morons telling people what you do for a living???
I'm going to present you with a whole other view on this and would encourage all of you to be significantly more discrete in talking about your work. Make no mistake about it, there is definitely a significant part of the population that takes a negative view of anyone working in banking & finance. The housing crisis of 2008 is a real thing, wage garnishments are a real thing. Occupy Wall Street was a real thing. You simply never know when someone out there harbors ill will towards banks, your bank and then, by extension, you. For example, if your bank does mortgages, do you really want someone thinking, "this little fawker works for the thieves that took my house from me 12 years ago!!!" or "this is the same fawker that's garnishing my wages right now!!!". That is not a position you want to be in, I assure you of that.
Do what I do. From now on, when someone asks what you do, just tell them you work with computers, "fixing people's antivirus and stuff . . .". That still explains why you have a decent income and no one usually cares to ask more questions beyond that. Please, for the love of all that is holy, exercise significantly more discretion than telling people what you actually do for a living.
No, that would be lying. I will not compromise my identity to cater to the delusions of other people. I am an investment banker and if someone wants to come at me for that, let them come at me. Banking is perfectly morally defensible, in fact we are playing our part in keeping the biggest economy in the world running and efficiently providing capital to deserving companies. If you’re talking to a bartender or something, what moral good does their job really do beyond getting people drunk? Stand by your integrity everyone and don’t contribute to the problem of misinformed people.
Or just say you're a plumber and if they ask why you decided to be one it's because you like laying pipe. Filters out the chicks who have no sense of humor
A few weeks back a friend of my older brother told me: „In a few years when you're ft in your Job you have to give me advice how I should invest my retirement money ;)" …
This was completely incoherent and I don't believe you've broken into IB with this English
The other day I told someone I was in banking and I was really surprised when they lit up and got excited........ turns out they thought I said I was in baking
Random people off the street - Bank Teller
Non-finance College Peers - Somewhere between Patrick Bateman and Charles Koch
Hardo Undergrad Prospects - Ultra busy, modestly wealthy, deal maker
VP - Overpaid indentured servant
MD - The other brown-haired Caucasian analyst who lateraled six months ago
GF - A fattening, overworked, stressed out home-office drone, or a solid movie date