Lack of talent in IB!

So for some perspective, I’m a senior and recently did a summer internship at Goldman after which I received a FT return offer. To my disappointment though, my intake and all the male analysts i came across were virtually all secret gooner/python pussy/matlab monkey types and there was a serious lack of hotties to gawk at. I think I went through the entire 3 months without wanting to touch any of the pootinanny. Or even having a loose night out with any of my male colleagues in the intake. They are allergic to having fun. I thought IB interviews were so supposed to screen out dorky dweebs who wouldn’t get on easily with clients. Seems like that’s all bullshit along with the perceived notion of requiring strong interpersonal skills and affability to pass the behaviourals. 

In terms of the girls, I barely spotted one girl under 30 that was a 7 or above. All of the hotter ones seemed to be above 30 and married. I also got a strong impression that the girls between the ages of 21-25 were just a bunch of raging feminist, Lyndsay Clancy sympathiser types, particularly the girls of colour who were absolutely no fun at all. And the white girls were all irritating, lgbt zombie, try hards who laughed way too hard at jokes that weren’t funny. 

So - my question is where do all the non-politicised hotties and normal dudes work at? Not a chance in hell I’m going back enduring 2 more years of that nonsense. Id rather recruit off cycle and hang with normal people who I can suck on a mug of beer with, than 2 more years with those neeks. Any suggestions? I’m assuming one of the MM IB’s is a better bet? Don’t care about any perceived drop in prestige at this point…

Thanks in advance gents.