Monty09 wants to start a business for $1000 with a monkey...any ideas

So I want to start a small biz with $1,000 in start up. Why? I am bored and want to see if we can do it. Looking for one person and an idea.

Any interest? Send me a pm....

59 Comments
 
monty09
blastoisehe didn't like my idea :(

dude I cant make baby food.... sorry

hahahahaha funniest 2 line comment on this site ever

If I had asked people what they wanted, they would have said faster horses - Henry Ford
 
Nouveau RichieDo an LBO and privatize Amtrak. That's my business idea.

You would probably have some cash left over

If I had asked people what they wanted, they would have said faster horses - Henry Ford
 

Start a company that sells volcano insurance. Then only target areas with little to no volcanic activity.

“Millionaires don't use astrology, billionaires do”
 
monty09
Nouveau RichieStart a company that sells volcano insurance. Then only target areas with little to no volcanic activity.

just wrong..haha

This was a Family Guy episode... the insurance guy's claim actually says "Oh my god he's signing it, I can't believe it, he's actually signing it..."

Pretty hysterical idea I must admit, but the sad thing is that in America you could probably make some pretty decent money on poor/stupid people doing this.

 
monty09
Nouveau Richie^^^ Oh shit, monty, you're about to pass drexel. Dayuumm...

i been very active last 3 months

You're already at 11 banana points in this thread alone and nothing useful has even been said yet!
CompBanker’s Career Guidance Services: https://www.rossettiadvisors.com/
 

This thread actually interests me -- thanks for posting monty. Sort of unrelated, but I have a question: what are the implications (legal or otherwise) of heading over to Harvard or MIT, posting a flyer for "open auditions" for ideas (i.e. you pitch me ideas, I provide the $$$ and run the business), picking a winner and funding the project? I realize there are accredited investor laws, but would this be allowed? This is a very honest question. Monty, more than willing to move this out of the thread, but thought it sort of tied in here.

 
jimbrowngoUThis thread actually interests me -- thanks for posting monty. Sort of unrelated, but I have a question: what are the implications (legal or otherwise) of heading over to Harvard or MIT, posting a flyer for "open auditions" for ideas (i.e. you pitch me ideas, I provide the $$$ and run the business), picking a winner and funding the project? I realize there are accredited investor laws, but would this be allowed? This is a very honest question. Monty, more than willing to move this out of the thread, but thought it sort of tied in here.
VC companies hang out at Stanford and MIT all the time having lunch with students looking for the next big thing. This is not an uncommon strategy.
CompBanker’s Career Guidance Services: https://www.rossettiadvisors.com/
 

I didn't mean to suggest there would be an issue. I was just curious if soliciting business ideas as such and playing more of the "businessman" side of the deal (for example, monty, say someone came to you with a brilliant software idea. Not suggesting I know much about your background, but I assume you wouldn't have the first clue in computer programming to execute 99% of the shit necessary to build a product) was legal or if there are ramifications around such a deal.

I have a terrific idea, but the problem is: (1) I don't possess the proper skills to execute such idea, and (2) I do not have any where near enough cash to go beyond the first month or two of the project.

 

Half a year ago I would have gone for spitbacks in Shanghai ... but they stopped spitting on the street somehow. Selling their spit to some weird genetics scientist would have been fun, though.

what about opening a fake headhunter company and distributing the interviews on youtube

"Make 'Nanas, not war! "
 
Jerreywhat about opening a fake headhunter company and distributing the interviews on youtube

Hahaha.

People like Coldplay and voted for the Nazis, you can't trust people Jeremy
 
ThaVanBurenBoyzLet's start a networking consultancy, where we introduce vulnerable students to headhunters on LinkedIn. Have you seen Dawn Boyer's earnings lately?

When you start to expand, be sure to recruit from target schools like Old Dominion...

“Millionaires don't use astrology, billionaires do”
 
boutiquebank4lifeI have a pretty sick business going already. I make posts that piss people off and my boss reads them and the responses and gets a good chuckle out of them and gives me 10 bucks for each post I make.

I dont really need a partner but I guess if you are funny enough you can try out to become a sidekick. Robin to my Batman.

Oh and I will take the 1k too.

Wait, so is the requirement being able to piss someone off or being funny? Because you generally seem to only be good at the former.

“Millionaires don't use astrology, billionaires do”
 
boutiquebank4lifeI have a pretty sick business going already. I make posts that piss people off and my boss reads them and the responses and gets a good chuckle out of them and gives me 10 bucks for each post I make.

I dont really need a partner but I guess if you are funny enough you can try out to become a sidekick. Robin to my Batman.

Oh and I will take the 1k too.

is your boss your mom?

 
stupidquestionsIf you don't mind doing something illegal, you could buy up as much Fourloko as you can if you can find stores that still have some of the original and sell it to your friends / over-eager college students at a premium over the next few months when they run out.

I know people back home who are doing this and making a killing charging $10 a can...

 

My friend and I are starting a business for 1000. He contributed the idea, the design work, the production knowledge, and some other things. I got a 30% share for start up costs (looking to be 800), web design, and will be running the "back office". We hope to be launching in a month or two.

looking for that pick-me-up to power through an all-nighter?
 
Best Response
monty09
LIBORMy friend and I are starting a business for 1000. He contributed the idea, the design work, the production knowledge, and some other things. I got a 30% share for start up costs (looking to be 800), web design, and will be running the "back office". We hope to be launching in a month or two.

need more funds.. come hit me up

Haha my "business associate" had trouble parting with a 30% share to give to me, and im sinking work into this!

start up costs run low. we use magento, an ecommerce platform, to power our site (free platform), and pay about 10 a month for the site. we will be using facebook, twitter and youtube for advertising, which is also free. only other costs are for materials (we are doing some manual labor ourselves, for the time being), but this is offset by our markup.

looking for that pick-me-up to power through an all-nighter?
 

Funny thing I am looking whether i can help a friend to get 1M for his father's startup, maybe you can put 1000 XD. I certainly dont think i can do it, but will try though. I think is harder to come with a nice business idea for less than and up to usd1000 than have the 1000, unless you go to underdeveloped countries or something like that. I in fact have an idea, but not the expertise to implement it nor the time to devote, so I would also prefer to offer the 1000 eur.

Valor is of no service, chance rules all, and the bravest often fall by the hands of cowards. - Tacitus Dr. Nick Riviera: Hey, don't worry. You don't have to make up stories here. Save that for court!
 

Amet ad sed ipsum et ut. Aut numquam sed inventore illum qui aut omnis. Illo debitis maxime quod eveniet.

Porro voluptatum unde et sed maxime enim numquam placeat. Consequatur consequatur sunt consequatur perspiciatis aliquid quo nam. Sunt alias necessitatibus rem non. Cumque quia eligendi cupiditate ipsam in vel.

Adipisci est voluptates aut quasi. Tenetur officiis autem nam est corrupti. Accusamus consequatur quaerat occaecati quo qui repellendus eos. Saepe autem error officia placeat enim nostrum.

Est nihil facere quia laudantium unde facere omnis perferendis. Illum id aperiam est enim eos qui. Pariatur et qui qui quis illum aperiam dolorum.

 

Laborum voluptatum dolorem magni omnis praesentium. Reprehenderit ad harum ratione accusamus reiciendis et omnis. Aliquam voluptatem repellendus neque et ut laboriosam ipsam. Voluptas quaerat ex porro sit. Dolor ut odit et eos veritatis qui magnam.

Velit ex nostrum et iure enim. Inventore facere esse cum accusamus maiores. Quia aut voluptatum et sequi minus. Minus quia ducimus optio dolor esse iusto totam magni.

Valor is of no service, chance rules all, and the bravest often fall by the hands of cowards. - Tacitus Dr. Nick Riviera: Hey, don't worry. You don't have to make up stories here. Save that for court!
 

Quas doloribus ratione sapiente et voluptas accusamus enim enim. Quas similique et dolore. Suscipit minus architecto voluptate tempora minima. Incidunt eos officiis consequuntur dolore laudantium. Ipsam est cupiditate veniam a sed quibusdam illo.

Impedit tempore saepe reiciendis beatae est quis velit. Est sunt expedita accusamus labore sunt magni sit. Tempore tenetur odio illum dolor. Nihil adipisci et necessitatibus dicta earum.

Aperiam voluptatum et non error. Modi ut quo nulla voluptas. Necessitatibus ut in a harum. Voluptatem quae eum officiis impedit provident blanditiis voluptatem. Maiores mollitia itaque aut ratione sunt architecto sint. Doloremque molestiae quibusdam labore saepe. Occaecati fuga et maxime tempora ducimus velit ea.

Career Advancement Opportunities

July 2026 Investment Banking

  • Evercore 01 99.4%
  • Moelis & Company 01 98.9%
  • JPMorgan 01 98.3%
  • Guggenheim Partners 01 97.8%
  • Morgan Stanley 07 97.2%

Overall Employee Satisfaction

July 2026 Investment Banking

  • Moelis & Company No 99.4%
  • Evercore No 98.9%
  • Morgan Stanley 01 98.3%
  • Banco Santander 02 97.7%
  • BMO Capital Markets 12 97.2%

Professional Growth Opportunities

July 2026 Investment Banking

  • Evercore 01 99.4%
  • Moelis & Company 01 98.9%
  • Morgan Stanley 06 98.3%
  • Goldman Sachs 01 97.8%
  • JPMorgan 01 97.2%

Total Avg Compensation

July 2026 Investment Banking

  • Vice President (16) $429
  • Associates (46) $258
  • 3rd+ Year Analyst (8) $210
  • 2nd Year Analyst (22) $179
  • Intern/Summer Associate (14) $159
  • 1st Year Analyst (80) $150
  • Intern/Summer Analyst (73) $101
notes
16 IB Interviews Notes

“... there’s no excuse to not take advantage of the resources out there available to you. Best value for your $ are the...”

Leaderboard

1
redever's picture
redever
99.2
2
kanon's picture
kanon
99.0
3
Secyh62's picture
Secyh62
99.0
4
BankonBanking's picture
BankonBanking
99.0
5
DrApeman's picture
DrApeman
98.9
6
dosk17's picture
dosk17
98.9
7
Betsy Massar's picture
Betsy Massar
98.9
8
CompBanker's picture
CompBanker
98.9
9
GameTheory's picture
GameTheory
98.9
10
Jamoldo's picture
Jamoldo
98.8
success
From 10 rejections to 1 dream investment banking internship

“... I believe it was the single biggest reason why I ended up with an offer...”