for you youngins (under 40, ideally under 30), what do you want out of life?

bump

Been thinking about this a lot recently. 31 years old, married with a 9-month old. Acquired a business two years ago that I ended up having to shut down late last year, which put a dent in our finances. Back to working in commercial RE debt, which is a good role, but not something I particularly enjoy or find intellectually stimulating. I often think about going off on my own again and the next venture in general, but healthcare costs alone put a stop to that almost immediately. Mid-term (next 5 years) would like to explore living abroad with my family (thinking Argentina or somewhere in Asia). My wife is on board with the plan, but is terrified of moving so far from her parents, especially with her dad's health getting worse. We'll see. I'm too young to stop the grind and I enjoy working, but I hope to find something stimulating that I can enjoy working on every day. Financially, don't think I need too much, and that number is far less than it was 3-4 years ago. I care more about time freedom and spending as much time as I can with my kids. Have spent months abroad at a time before and would love to travel with my family and show them the world. 

I'm 34.

5 years - Our family is established in Manhattan and my kids are in good schools. My wife is happy and has found purpose after SAHM life. I'm pushing 2000 USCF. I'm in good shape with great health markers. Continue international travel to see the world.

10 years - I'm close to FatFIRE numbers. I've done a really good job at managing my health and so have my parents. Start to make biology research my main interest. Don't take foot off the gas but find more time for leisure and hedonism.

34. Want to get to the financial independence portion of my life especially given how bleak employment in finance looks with AI.

Secondly I want to travel once that is comfortably accomplished. Exercise in ways I enjoy particularly golf and tennis. Volunteer in making places better around my community (this is also intentionally vague). If you asked me this question 2 years ago there would be more material possessions involved but now I feel like those don’t matter nearly as much 

@thebrofessor brofessor is back!!! what's up dawg

28m 

At a stage agnostic fund, married no intent on having a kid before 32-33. My aim in the next 5 years is to launch a side business that nets me at least 2-5k post tax, I have a few ideas on how to go about this, mostly a motivation issue / work timing issue to launch. With that money, I want to buy a porsche (i’m in mcol). Just a discretionary fund, while I maximize savings from income. 

In 10 years, I want to position myself such that I am able to buy and run a 15-20m TEV business and / or launch my own - I have some thoughts on how to go about this, and have a few sectors that I have my eyes on. My wife will be a surgeon by then hopefully, allowing me to take unlimited business risk / devote full-time. 

I’m in no rush in the near term, outside of discretionary pocket money. Otherwise, I do want to build substantial equity by 40-45. 

Worst case, I keep my job (people like me and I have good upward momentum) and my wife becomes a surgeon. We still net a good income. 

del

banging chicks and clubbing at night and chilling on the beach during the day. most likely in Thailand or Philippines.

Had a close friend die in his 20s and went to his funeral. He was an exceptional person and a pillar of the communities he was a part of. I remember there being a huge sea of family, friends, colleagues, ex professors from college, senior leadership of his bank, etc. Everyone came out of the woodwork for this guy and were genuinely affected beyond “going through the motions” for a funeral.

Changed the way I look at my own life. I want to live well for the people close to me and for the communities I am part of so that one day, when I inevitably pass, people turn out for me. Not in a narcissistic way but as a framework for thinking through how to act and making the most of my time.

To that end, I want to earn the reputation for being loving and warm with friends and family, doing “the right thing”, working hard (but not too much), and being involved in the world outside the finance bubble we live in. The money in this industry is nice, but it’s just a cherry on top / window dressing to the more important things.

I'm 25. I'm going to keep spending a lot of time with my parents and grandparents (very lucky to have 4 currently but they're getting older) over the next five years. Lucky my parents are quite healthy still. By 30 I want to be married or seriously on that trajectory so I'm not a super old dad. Before 35 start my own fund or purchase a business and run it. I will probably need to get an MBA but I honestly prefer working to school. I want to work internationally sometime in the next five years too, so an MBA could be a good reason to be in certain countries. 

More than anything going to continue to appreciate my friends, invite them to stuff, and just be grateful for the 1-2x a year hangouts since my network has dispersed significantly. Really need to be able to just pick right up where we left off because the weekly hang isn't feasible for a good 60%+ of my friend group despite shared interests, compatible personalities. Watering friendships is so key. When I'm in certain cities for work I will literally book myself with friends for breakfast lunch and dinner between meetings. Only way to see a dozen people in a week. Favorite thing is getting a big table at a chinese spot near friends offices so people can swing through and graze dim sum without committing to a whole dinner. In new york I have a good core group I see weekly as well who are mostly younger than me.

Life is really great and I'm just trying to keep it going with eyes wide open that as people settle down it will evolve into a new season of life with new experiences and social dynamics. A wife and kid would provide the most purpose. I love my niece, so awesome.

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@thebrofessor  - sorry for the stream of consciousness

32 years old. started my career in IB as an analyst then pivoted to a role within commercial real estate acquisitions. Now at a VP level within my career. with a girlfriend of 2 years who i see myself with long term. 

As far as what I want, not sure in terms of 5, 10, 15 years, but generally, I want to be completely in control of my own time and not answer to anyone. I feel that through my 20's, I missed out on a lot of life experiences because I was so focused on my career.  I really envy the people who backpacked asia / latin america when they had nothing to lose in their early 20's. Of course I could also do that now, but it's not quite the same. Even for my friends who didn't do extensive travel and just worked normal corporate jobs, they had time every night on weekdays and every weekend to go out, explore and really enjoy themselves whereas I was frequently in the office until like 2-3 am working on some random PPT aligning logos. Don't get me wrong, the sacrifices I made put me at a very good spot and have been able to accumulate a large nest egg. I suppose the grass is always greener. These days I care less and less about career and am essentially quiet quitting and would like to take some sabbatical to play "catch up" on time lost during my 20's. So I guess for my next 5 years, I want to have as much fun as possible that I missed out on in my 20's. I've been adopting this more and TBH it is a lot harder as a 32 year old vs. early 20's. 

I don't necessarily hate working, but I would like to do something that is fully on my own time, with deadlines set by myself. I also want to be remote and a digital nomad out of a country in Southeast Asia and actually get bang for my buck in the place I live. I have a good gig right now with decent work life balance, but the problem is that it's not that bad, but it also indirectly controls my time/freedom. Admittedly, I do follow the FIRE mindset though I may not actually pull the trigger and retire, but just step back. Right now I have a decent net worth and am getting closer to the transition point where I take my foot off the gas. The problem is that while a few months off purely to focus on leisure / travel would be fun, I ultimately want to think about what I want to build towards (and frankly, I don't know what that is which is something I'm struggling with). 

In terms of work - I don't love real estate or finance and am definitely not passionate about it. As I look to how careers progress in this industry, I don't look up to MDs in IB or Partners in PE. I can respect their work and their wealth, sure, but I in no way envy their lives and wouldn't trade my life for theirs. That said, this industry has given me the skills I have so I'd like to find some way to monetize it in a way that gives me a flexible lifestyle (i.e. consulting or contracting). I've tried doing some freelance modeling for one of the AI training companies and I actually enjoyed that because I could start and stop whenever I wanted. That said, eventually those roles will disappear or pay a lot less because once the AI is trained, in theory those jobs disappear. 

In terms of lifestyle - my main hobbies are soccer and I'm pretty into fitness generally. Would also want to pick up new skills such as muy thai or maybe even an instrument. On day-to-day basis, I want time every day to go to lift weights for 1 hour, cardio (either soccer or walking) for 1 hour, get 8 hours of sleep, leisurely lunches/dinners every day and with the remainder of the time dedicated to work.  Weekends I'd want to explore new restaurants, go to bars, and occasionally go clubbing (while it's still fun for me). More macro, I'd like to have 3 places - one place in the US, one place in Europe, and one place in Southeast Asia. All of which I could airbnb and they break even on monthly expenses so that I can just block off time whenever I want and go to each place for a few months at a time. 

Kids/family - I am still undecided on whether or not I want kids (I lean no). I think if you made me choose right now as a 32 year old either have kids or never have kids, I would easily choose never have kids. My GF thinks the same way. That said, I could change my mind down the line (as could my GF). My parents are definitely getting older now and I'd like to be able to have time, flexibility and money to take care of them as well. 

Generally speaking, I guess I'm at a point now where I'm reflecting on my life a lot more recently. I'm no longer "young and full of potential" and am very much so the product of my choices from late teens through twenties. I did well in school, got into a good college, got into IB and held a good job through now, and for that I'm grateful. On the other hand, however, it feels like I gave a top 1% effort and have achieved top 1% outcomes (for my age cohort), yet I'm still not balling out or anything. It's not like I'm worth tens of millions and can just do/buy whatever I want - I'm just living a very normal upper middle class lifestyle. Also now that I feel that a lot of my college friends are growing more and more distant as we settle in our own lives and that in itself feels sad to me in many ways. I feel like I'll never been in an environment of my peers where everyone is open to being friends and socializing on a daily basis, so in some ways I miss the community that college fosters. I guess overall, on paper I have a life that people would kill to have, but at the same time I don't know if I've truly built a life that makes me happy yet. There are still a lot of big questions that I don't know the answer to (i.e. what do I want to do for work) that I thought I would have answered by now. No real conclusion here and no real lesson for anyone else - just another monkey navigating the world. 

God fearing family and a big ass house.

30, married 4 years today, and first child on the way in 3 months. Wife and I both have solid jobs and bought a house last year (major TX city). Life is good and we aren't wanting for anything although we aren't "well off" by any means. That being said, we are able to go on trips, have a good work/life balance, and really not have to say no to much things. Just trying to live within our means. 

To your question, I want a job I really enjoy that doesn't feel like work (if this exists). I'm at a multi-family office in more of a wealth management/allocator role for client capital. You've been helpful on this forum in my career journey so thank you for that. I'm a CFP, have good experience, but I just don't think I like the client facing role and would rather do something more analytical. 

Trying to pivot by getting my CFA (on L2 in August) and ideally would end up in an allocator seat at an endowment, SFO, or foundation. I'm finding the pivot tough and my current job is stressful. I'm extroverted and things always go well but still feel a bit of imposter syndrome speaking with clients who are all sophisticated. 

Anyways, in 5 years I hope to be in a role I really enjoy with my wife and kid(s) happy as can be and taken care of. 

Not having to do the things I don't want to do so I can spend more time doing the things that I love. There's nothing better in my opinion. 

I spent the last 6 years investing a shit ton of time getting really good at my job, only to feel that there was a gaping hole somewhere. It took me a long time to realize what that hole was (which I won't get into). While I love many aspects of my job, this one missing piece makes it unlikely for me to stick to the field I'm in. I'm now figuring out if I can find a new job, possibly in a new field, that fills this hole while maintaining the aspects that I love. (If I've learned anything, while it may be hard to find the "perfect" job, there are MANY jobs out there that are significantly better than the previous jobs you've had.)

Early in my career, I was in a completely different coast from where all my friends ended up, so I'd only see them 1-2 times per year around the holidays or for our planned trips. This let me focus full time on my gf, job, and hobbies, all of which turned out pretty well. Now that I'm back in New York, I realized that I don't necessarily feel the need to see my friends that often. Texting and a phone call here and there is plenty enough. I might see them maybe 2-3 times now, but that's sufficient for me. I don't want to get drinks at a bar or go to the club, which, as someone in their early 30s in a long-term relationship, is less appealing. I only drank to bang chicks, not sit around with a bunch of other dude. I'd rather spend my time on my hobbies or spend that time with friends ideating on interesting business ideas or having debates on whether we are in a simulation. 

I had an interesting conversation with my gf a couple weeks ago around money. She may potentially have an exit for a company that she started a few years ago, and she jokingly asked whether I would just retire and go traveling. While that sounds like a lot of fun, retired people are some of the most miserable people I've seen. After a few years of traveling and fucking around, they become bored. They then realize that they've become irrelevant and out of touch with what's happening with the world. There's only so much time you can spend with loved ones before the marginal utility of spending another minute drops precipitously. It's the longing for the next big catch that keeps someone excited about life. That could be a new business exit, a car, or an AP. I couldn't care less about what that "thing" is as long as it keeps you hungry. Who knows, maybe my gf's exit may never happen and crash and burn. But it's that hope that keeps us excited about the future. 

As Immanuel Kant said, the rules for happiness are something to do, someone to love, and something to hope for. The latter two are pretty set for me. I just need to find something better to do. 

Not having to do the things I don't want to do so I can spend more time doing the things that I love. There's nothing better in my opinion. 

I spent the last 6 years investing a shit ton of time getting really good at my job, only to feel that there was a gaping hole somewhere. It took me a long time to realize what that hole was (which I won't get into). While I love many aspects of my job, this one missing piece makes it unlikely for me to stick to the field I'm in. I'm now figuring out if I can find a new job, possibly in a new field, that fills this hole while maintaining the aspects that I love. (If I've learned anything, while it may be hard to find the "perfect" job, there are MANY jobs out there that are significantly better than the previous jobs you've had.)

Early in my career, I was in a completely different coast from where all my friends ended up, so I'd only see them 1-2 times per year around the holidays or for our planned trips. This let me focus full time on my gf, job, and hobbies, all of which turned out pretty well. Now that I'm back in New York, I realized that I don't necessarily feel the need to see my friends that often. Texting and a phone call here and there is plenty enough. I might see them maybe 2-3 times now, but that's sufficient for me. I don't want to get drinks at a bar or go to the club, which, as someone in their early 30s in a long-term relationship, is less appealing. I only drank to bang chicks, not sit around with a bunch of other dude. I'd rather spend my time on my hobbies or spend that time with friends ideating on interesting business ideas or having debates on whether we are in a simulation. 

I had an interesting conversation with my gf a couple weeks ago around money. She may potentially have an exit for a company that she started a few years ago, and she jokingly asked whether I would just retire and go traveling. While that sounds like a lot of fun, retired people are some of the most miserable people I've seen. After a few years of traveling and fucking around, they become bored. They then realize that they've become irrelevant and out of touch with what's happening with the world. There's only so much time you can spend with loved ones before the marginal utility of spending another minute drops precipitously. It's the longing for the next big catch that keeps someone excited about life. That could be a new business exit, a car, or an AP. I couldn't care less about what that "thing" is as long as it keeps you hungry. Who knows, maybe my gf's exit may never happen and crash and burn. But it's that hope that keeps us excited about the future. 

As Immanuel Kant said, the rules for happiness are something to do, someone to love, and something to hope for. The latter two are pretty set for me. I just need to find something better to do. 

This thread made me very depressed. 31 and soon to be 32. Very lost. Also want the American dream (home, support family on one income, ample time for leisure, etc.)

I read other people’s stories and we’re similar yet I’m even further behind. Have a little under $1mm saved and yet it’s basically nothing. $3mm is the new $1mm. I have been making $250-$300k for nearly 5 years. Live a full life with lots of friends but single - mostly due to my own pickiness and self sabotage.

Work in CRE and would love to move to a more corporate role but it feels impossible in this job market. I think it’s time to move cities / jobs but it’s difficult to start over at my age. At least 1-2 years of transition and then I’ll be 34. Posters above me feel closer to the dream than I am.

@thebrofessor I am a 22 year old recent grad, and a longtime lurker on WSO, but this question is driving a response. I've read a few of your posts and appreciate any input on the following.

Graduated from a non-target school (BIG 12) with a degree in finance; worked for a large aggregates and mining company through college. Love operations work and that industry, but quit in search of the greener grass that my mind insists is out there. My biggest fear is becoming one of those guys that I've worked with in college, 40-something years old, telling the "kid" to go spread his wings so they don't end up like me.

I'm a huge outdoorsman, so being within range of the outdoors is very important to me. Also need to have access to "city life", as I am a big fan of bars and nightlife (at least for now).

I guess all I really want is a girlfriend by 25, family and having kids by my early 30s, and a job that puts me in the upper middle class and can support them along with my hobbies and travel. Unfortunately, the current economic climate makes it feel like these things are unobtainable unless you pick the right career path and have a stroke of luck. Gone are the days when my grandfather worked pouring concrete for water towers and proceeded to afford 800+ acres of land in the Northern Midwest. 

Really struggling post-grad whether to get into PE/Consulting, wealth management, or industrial sales/service (explosives, long story). I have a very strong network, and breaking into those industries isn't at all the issue. I am more concerned about making a career path mistake and getting pigeonholed in an industry with exit ops that aren't appealing. 

Been studying for FINRA exams this summer, as I can take them through my old man. (Side note - If I get into WM, I want nothing to do with staying in my home city and taking over my dad's book in the near future. I really want to get out there and build something for myself.) I'm just generally unsure if it really will all work out fine if I go do what interests me versus what I think will just generate me the most income.

No real conclusion for this one. Just a kid struggling with the post-grad transition in a time where it feels harder than ever to decide what to go do. But maybe it is all in my head, just like my old man tells me. 

I’m still in University so I am pretty focussed on starting my career - but unsure between Law (Patents) or Consulting but I do know I want to work with innovation and policy (have STEM background but non-Target but T25 in the UK) but also with niche industries and work on various projects related to risk and strategy acting as a trusted advisor where I really get to deep dive into intricacies, have some entrepreneurial flair, solve complex problems whilst learning and applying a wide range of skills but focussing on a defined remit. I really want to maintain a good social life - work decent hours, travel with friends, football every weekend, weekly drinks with my colleagues, maybe join our version of the Air National Guard (RAuxAF) - overall just love both my job and my life and be young enough to enjoy it all. I have done a few informational interviews/coffee chats and it has helped me line up some really good summer experiences at T1 Law Firms and a Global Technology Consulting Firm but am still pretty stuck and not sure where to go from here. In fact, I know for a that I would never ave gotten these opportunities without networking because of the sorry state of affairs that the UK job market is in since this government took over - PhDs competing against UGs for the same Internships but that is a different story. I really love some aspects of the Law (note Law in the UK does not require a Law Degree) and the same with Consulting and both have pathways where I can pursue the niches I really want to whilst maintaining the breadth I desire and both require some interconnected skills in addition to some sector specific knowledge but I am willing to work towards gaining that. I worked (and still am working) in Politics alongside University and absolutely love it and it has taught me so many transferable skills whilst absolutely exploding my network - maybe that is where I end up but beforehand, I want what politicians call a “real job” - something where I actually work in the “real world” and build expertise that I can bring into the Public Sector. No real conclusion I can draw either - I kinda know what I want to do but completely torn as to where to go from here; lots of the other posts here have definitely had me thinking of what exactly I want especially in my personal life - thanks @thebrofessor for creating this thread.

I'm under 40, but definitely well over 30.

I don't think I've ever shared this with anyone before, but my biggest goal in life is becoming a grandfather someday and getting to play with (hopefully) multiple grandkids.

On the surface, I probably don't seem like someone who would be concerned about mortality. Most people who meet me would probably say I'm in very good shape. If anything, I'm on the skinnier side (while a lot of my peers are trying to lose weight, I've spent years trying to put muscle onto my tall, lanky frame). I've done the function health bloodwork, most of my biomarkers look good, and I even tried prenuvo once. Nothing significant showed up.

If I told people my greatest fear is dying young, I suspect a lot of them would think I'm being ridiculous. But over the years I've had a handful of experiences that really drove home just how fragile life can be.

Recently, someone in my social circle died very suddenly in his mid-40s. We weren't especially close, but we'd see each other at the gym all the time. The last time I saw him we spent a few minutes catching up between sets. Less than a week later, I learned he had gone into cardiac arrest in his sleep while on vacation.

Last year, another guy I knew was found dead in his apartment. He was in his early 40s, single, no kids, and lived alone. He didn't show up to work and wasn't answering calls or texts, so the police did a wellness check. It turned out he had accidentally overdosed.

I know these are low-probability events, and statistically they shouldn't occupy as much space in my mind as they sometimes do. But knowing something is unlikely doesn't make it feel impossible. Once you've seen enough examples of people whose lives ended decades earlier than anyone expected, it's hard not to internalize that tomorrow isn't guaranteed.

Ironically, that awareness has made me appreciate ordinary life more, not less. My ideal future isn't particularly glamorous. I want to grow old with my wife, watch my kids become happy, independent adults, eventually spoil my grandkids, stay healthy enough to throw a baseball around or whatever with them, and still be curious about the world. If my career continues to go well, great. If I build something meaningful that lasts, even better. But those things feel secondary.

When I picture myself in the future, the ideal scene for me would be a noisy family gathering where there are too many people around the dinner table, kids running around the yard, and me being old enough that everyone calls me Grandpa, but still healthy enough to get down on the floor and play with them.

36, been on this platform for a while.

I do reasonably well, own a few properties free and clear, including my own house. No debt save for a small loan on my 67 Mustang. But I'm fairly unhappy on a day to day basis. My work is incredibly unfulfilling and is a waste of time in my opinion, regardless of the pay. I'm taking over two family businesses that have been poorly run for a few decades and I deal with tremendous resistance from parents with respect to changing things since the businesses do well from a dollar perspective.

The goal is to start something of my own that makes double of what I'm making now and more importantly, challenges me mentally and creatively and gives me purpose so I can ultimately leave the family businesses (at some point sell them) and do something that is fulfilling. 

Problem is, I have no idea what I want to do and I have a finite amount of energy that is unfortunately spent at work. I don't want to be doing this at 40, I don't want to work for anyone or answer to anyone. I want enough time and money and flexibility to be able to work as much or as little as I want, when I want, and where I want and to indulge in all my hobbies but I am running out of time and it's frustrating.

I haven't really changed much. In my early 30s and...

1. Fun work that I enjoy doing. It shouldn't feel like work. This has been very good for me. The % of stuff I do that I enjoy VS do not enjoy has improved tremendously over time. I want it to be 95%+.
2. Good health. I was cursed with very bad luck @ ~17 with an uncurable spinal problem. It's improved slowly but there have been other complications. Can't really do much for this unfortunately lol. It's probably the worst part of my life. Usually it's ok...but I still can't do a lot of things that are high impact and I can't lift very heavy, which I used to LOVE.
3. Good relationship with kids, wife and parents. Have one kid so far and aiming for 2 more. I have a lot of materially successful friends who are miserable because of weird issues with their parents, kids or spouse...I don't want to be that guy!
4. Keep my relationships with my good friends. I have a bunch of them from the industry I am in. We fly out to hang out with each other a few times a year and I have so much fun with them + enjoy learning together. 
5. I guess money wise... I am pretty set and I don't really have goals around this. More money isn't going to change anything for me day to day. Neither my wife or I are big spenders. I am probably worse than her, but I am still not that bad. I think so long as I'm still over ~$2m - $3m a year, I am pretty easy.

I’ve learned most things that seem important don’t matter. I’d be happy with two vacations a year (snowboarding and beach) and have enough time for fitness (running, weights, Pilates) and time for gaming. Basically a corpo job can provide all this.

For your context, I'm in my early 30s, ex-MBB/MBA, mid-level at a big corporate.

if you had to paint a picture of your life in 5, 10, 15 years, what are you doing? what's your relationship status? family status? location? day to day life? interests outside of work?

1. Top of the list for me: I want to be happily married to my current girlfriend (proposal incoming this fall), with 3+ healthy & happy kids that I get to spend time with every day.
2. Career: I've put in ~10 years to institutional jobs at this point. As I compare to my dad who has worked 100% independently (basically a freelancer in a non-business field not really a business outside billing clients), I feel fed up with my success being so heavily built on the business winds/executive decisions blowing me around instead of quality of my effort translating to success/failure. In my ideal world 5 years from now I'm working 100% for myself, putting my analytical, operational, and relationship-building skills to work building my own business. Feel that I am willing to accept lack of prestige and longer hours than corporate life to make this happen as long as there is clear trajectory to earnings that can support my family without my wife needing to work. I also put a lot of value on finding ways to provide stable careers to the local community so ideally develop a business that can employ.
3. Day to day I think I'd be happiest going to the office up to 5 days per week as long as it is my own office. If I had to work for a company I don't want to be there more than 3x per week, ideally only 2. I like to work out in the morning (9-10am), and happy to work till 7-8 to trade off slower mornings. I hate car commuting so really want to live somewhere I can take the subway, train, or bicycle to my office. Evenings I want to be cooking dinner with my partner, and weekends gathering with friends for meals, church, and gentle exercise (weekends I prefer yoga or hikes to the lifting & cardio I do during the week)

Feels like the biggest transitions for me coming up are getting married (have clear plan here) and transitioning to self employment (have not figured this out yet, have a hundred ideas and an active side project).