Hooking up with someone NOT from a dating app

I haven’t hooked up with someone that I didn’t meet online since 2019.

I feel weird about this. I’m 27, so didn’t fully grow up “online”, although dating apps have been around since I was a sophomore in college or so.

I can’t help but feel like meeting someone on a dating app is less fulfilling for long term relationships compared to meeting organically. Yet I can’t seem to break out of the cycle of meeting women that way.

Part of the problem is that I do fine on dating apps - the girls are generally attractive. And I feel like it’s so rare that I’m at a party, at a bar, whatever, and there’s an attractive, single girl I’m interested in talking to.
 

Maybe I need to get out more, be more involved in coed activities, but I’m not sure. Guys in your 20s who are hooking up with girls you primarily meet out and about, how tf are you doing it?

12 Comments
 

JimmyHoffaPetGecko

I haven't hooked up with someone that I didn't meet online since 2019.

I feel weird about this. I'm 27, so didn't fully grow up "online", although dating apps have been around since I was a sophomore in college or so.

I can't help but feel like meeting someone on a dating app is less fulfilling for long term relationships compared to meeting organically. Yet I can't seem to break out of the cycle of meeting women that way.

Part of the problem is that I do fine on dating apps - the girls are generally attractive. And I feel like it's so rare that I'm at a party, at a bar, whatever, and there's an attractive, single girl I'm interested in talking to.

 

Maybe I need to get out more, be more involved in coed activities, but I'm not sure. Guys in your 20s who are hooking up with girls you primarily meet out and about, how tf are you doing it?

Never happened.

 

Sorry to hijack, but I have a question for you or anyone on here. How in the world do you "hook up" with someone you just met? I'm a good looking guy (for now lol), but no girl I've met is willing to have sex within the first day we've met. How does this work? Is it a numbers game? How does the scenario unfold? I'm 19 and I have a lot to learn here. Thanks for the guidance.

 
anon_monkey123

Sorry to hijack, but I have a question for you or anyone on here. How in the world do you "hook up" with someone you just met? I'm a good looking guy (for now lol), but no girl I've met is willing to have sex within the first day we've met. How does this work? Is it a numbers game? How does the scenario unfold? I'm 19 and I have a lot to learn here. Thanks for the guidance.

Numbers game + being hot enough (or having enough ‘clout’)

Majority of the girls i added on IG/Snap, so they’d see me hanging out with others, doing cool activities, etc.. preselection 101 type stuff. If you’re with some bad hoes on your IG story, then obviously you’re doing something right and they subconsciously want a piece of it. Do not go for the obvious flex/brag approach and do not engage in mindless texts back and forth.. texts messages are generally for logistics only

No immediate lays within minutes of matching for me, but lots within minutes or hours of physically meeting up for the first time 
 

I’m a WSO boomer and have been off market for years though. Maybe these days you just need a blue check mark and you’re set 

 

Realizing WSO was prob not the right place to ask this question….

Couple ways:

1) Meet in person at a bar, class, through friends, whatever. If you guys hit it off find an excuse to get her number. “Let me get your number so we can meet at xyz bar later” or “ill text you if i end up going to xyz party next weekend” Then you can text her to ask her out another day. Also a lot of times when you meet through friends, one of the girls friends will ask you separately, “what do you think about girl, do you think she’s cute?” Etc etc.

2) Meet on dating app, grab drinks or food, if all goes well you invite her on a 2nd date and ask her back to your place.

Trick is to not move too quickly to hooking up. Just talk to her like a normal person for a bit. Good luck, hope you get laid soon

 

Logistics buddy. You live in a suburb and have to uber to a bar? Yea bringing her back is weird.

You live downtown walking distance to some bars and ask her to go home so you can share a glass of wine on your rooftop or balcony? Then yea your success rate will be high.

You are 19 which is ridiculously young still. You need to be unafraid to make mistake and fall on your ass to learn this stuff

 

Alcohol 

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 

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