Long-distance relationship in IB?
This isnt a work-related query to preface. Starting FT in M&A this summer. My group isn’t the sweatiest - I’d say hours are like 70-80 on average with weekends being OK.
My gf is doing a masters in a different city (1 hour flight away) before returning to the city I am currently based in after she’s finished.
I wanted to ask about navigating long distance. We have been dating for 3 years (met her in undergrad) are super close and our relationship has been nothing short of great, so no underlying issues. We are about to spend 1 year apart so if anyone has any thoughts on how best to handle this year to keep this strong while balancing IB, it would be very much appreciated! Thanks!
Navigating a long-distance relationship while working in IB is challenging but definitely manageable with the right approach. Based on the most helpful WSO content, here are some key strategies to maintain a strong relationship:
Set Clear Expectations Early
Prioritize Communication
Be Present When Together
Create a System for Busy Times
Plan Visits in Advance
Leverage Technology
Focus on the Long-Term Goal
Be Flexible and Understanding
Avoid Overcommitting
Evaluate and Adjust
As one WSO user wisely pointed out, relationships are what you make of them. With strong communication, mutual understanding, and a shared commitment, you can navigate this year apart successfully. Good luck!
Sources: IB + Long Distance Relationship, Q&A: Buyside women, I met a girl and I don’t want to do this anymore, I met a girl and I don’t want to do this anymore, Q&A - Post-MBA VP
Bump
Long-distance in IB is not easy, but it’s doable, especially since it’s just a year. The biggest thing is setting expectations early—your schedule will be brutal, so she needs to know when you’ll realistically have time to talk or visit. Since it’s only a one-hour flight, planning trips in advance will help so you both have something to look forward to. You won’t have time for long calls every day, but even a quick check-in or voice note goes a long way. When you do see her, be present—don’t let work take over every moment. Since you already have a solid relationship, as long as you make the effort, you’ll be fine.
Did it successfully, my advice is "don't fuck up a good thing". Keep doing the little extra things, especially now that you have actual money. Get her flowers delivered randomly. Set up a defined time every week that you will connect. Write her letters and USPS them. Maybe pay for her cabin upgrade coming back on a long weekend. Most importantly, no matter how shitty work is (and trust me, it will get insane) just be her rock, super happy and upbeat and supportive. Leave all those feelings at the door when you go home.
The time you spend apart lets you appreciate how amazing your connection is when you're together - don't let off the gas in showing how you feel.
This is really, really great advice. Keep doing the little things. If you have Chase or Amex, I believe you can just call their concierge for flower deliveries. Order dinner delivered to her place. Not for a specific event, but "just because."
The not complaining about work part is also so true. I really wish somebody gave me this advice when I was a 1st year analyst. I'm all for communication, but especially in IB, it's a degree of emotional burden you're putting on your partner. This doesn't mean censor how your day went, but try to keep it brief, positive, and more importantly, give her a place to share how her day went. To feel listened to and loved.
Talking about how an MD threw a phone at you because you missed a footnote on page 130 at 3am isn't conducive to that.
Odio quia consequatur aliquam sunt harum. Ex eaque dolor distinctio accusantium rem aut. Hic ullam quis quia officiis pariatur eaque.
See All Comments - 100% Free
WSO depends on everyone being able to pitch in when they know something. Unlock with your email and get bonus: 6 financial modeling lessons free ($199 value)
or Unlock with your social account...