I’d like to briefly draw some attention to divorce, divorce settlements, alimony, etc. For obvious reasons, these are issues that would seem to be of particular concern to high earners (i.e., a Bankers, PE Professionals, etc.). To anyone out there who has dabbled with the idea of premarital agreements, how did you bring this idea up to your potential spouse without demonstrating a fear of commitment or lack of faith in the partnership?
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My SO was fine with it. I earn about 1.5x what she does, but realistically I could be 2x by the time I ramp up and hit the promotions I hope for, in the next 5 yr horizon
The conversation started because I've had 3-5 family members go thru ugly divorces (in the last 5 yrs), where there was a lot of back and forth on who owns what and who paid for who's education bills, etc... after explaining this to her, I think it became understandable where I'm coming from
ULTIMATELY:
We agreed on a shared account where we'd contribute equally (TBD as a % of base income or a "fixed dollar basket") and use that for shared expenses like homeownership, child care, food, etc (the "restricted group")
All other bank and retirement accounts would be kept segregated (the "unrestricted group")
Lastly, there would be a 10-15 yr sunset on the prenup (it would expire) -- ("MFN protection")... if it's been that long anyway, I mean, I think we gucci
My SO works in finance, so it's a lot easier to explain a rationale way to handle money so we aren't side eyeing each other after a splurge purchase, sending money to relatives, spending money on girls/guys trips, etc
If you work with credit agreements, I hope you enjoyed my analogies... please upvote me :)
Prenup expiration? What’s the point?
I get you think you’ll be good after 15 years but what you’re effectively saying is either “only after 15 years will I trust you enough to get rid of this prenup” or “after this arbitrary time period I’m going to remove all of my protection”. Not logical.
Lol imagine being what, 55? Worked your whole life saving up, investing, only to lose half at 56 because the fucking expiration clause
Its like riding a motorcycle with a helmet on but at a half way point on your way home, you decide that riding without one doesn't seem that dangerous, nothing happened till now right? So you ditch that bitch and ride without one all the way home.
When your sex educator said wear condoms, she meant prenups mate.
My own parents divorce was ugly. One was making more money than the other but the other had family money. Big question was how to split the pie. 50/50 seems fair in their case although each tried to get more. Whole thing lasted 5+ years, a prenup can solve both the fairness issue and make a potential divorce more straight forward.
But in my case should I marry my current SO, I both make more money and have more family money. I don’t see a reason why my SO should get a piece of my family money as it has nothing to do with her and the opposite would also apply (I am by no means interested in any of her heritage), but current earnings make sense to be split as she supports me on a daily basis.
Are you in the UK cos she wouldn’t get any of your family wealth/ inheritance then. It is only wealth/assets you make in the course of the marriage that would be divided.
if you are in the Uk she won’t get a penny of your inheritance/family wealth. I believe that it is only money/assets earned in the course of the marriage that is divided. Your family wealth is separate and exclusive to you. However remember the woman keeps the ring and maintains her lifestyle after divorce as per marriage. So don’t start any weekly flower & scented candle deliveries for the dogs kennel or grocery shopping at Fortnums.
Not british although I work in the UK, I may not get married in the UK.
I'm assuming this is an America vs. Europe thing, but this just reads funny.
"I don't give A DAMN about where her ancestors are from. Don't you dare tell me - I don't want to hear it!"
Typed it on a call, heritage is probably not the most international word I could have used, inheritance is probably better haha
my parents’ divorce could’ve put me through Harvard twice with the $. get the prenup.
This is the type of WSO content I miss.
I earn 5x as much as my SO but her parents are more well off than mine. Real estate is key...
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