Since the US politician buffoons are starting to scrutinize insider trading by politicians, I better start a PE MF to leverage my insider information before the ripple effect hits me (I'm a senator/equivalent at a high tier G7 country).
Now I want to name it "Jupiter Global Management" because Jupiter > Apollo and Apollo > other shit-tier PE funds like KKR, BX, Ares and the other edgy names.
Alternatively, I was thinking of "Celestial Advisors" to really signify our celestial knowledge and skills.
Jupiter and celestial honestly aren't bad names; Jupiter certainly has a more masculine ring to it because of the namesake mythological figure.
Not a big fan of "advisors" because of how ordinary it sounds and how it taints the glamorous connotations of "celestial." "Partners" could work better
Partners makes it sound like some shitty boiler room. Partners implies there's a committee of equally important people, when in reality I am the most important.
How about "Jupiter Interstellar Management"?
Jupiter Universal
Universal sounds to third world.
"Jupiter Intercontinential Advisors"?
Fuck, now that sounds like a ballistic missile.
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