What should I name my PE MF

Since the US politician buffoons are starting to scrutinize insider trading by politicians, I better start a PE MF to leverage my insider information before the ripple effect hits me (I'm a senator/equivalent at a high tier G7 country). 
 

Now I want to name it "Jupiter Global Management" because Jupiter > Apollo and Apollo > other shit-tier PE funds like KKR, BX, Ares and the other edgy names.

Alternatively, I was thinking of "Celestial Advisors" to really signify our celestial knowledge and skills.

6 Comments
 

Jupiter and celestial honestly aren't bad names; Jupiter certainly has a more masculine ring to it because of the namesake mythological figure.

Not a big fan of "advisors" because of how ordinary it sounds and how it taints the glamorous connotations of "celestial." "Partners" could work better

 

Partners makes it sound like some shitty boiler room. Partners implies there's a committee of equally important people, when in reality I am the most important.

How about "Jupiter Interstellar Management"?

 

Repellat est et et repudiandae eum in asperiores sunt. Non reprehenderit et sunt commodi quasi hic. Ab sunt consequatur aut voluptas officia facilis facilis. Ut blanditiis explicabo natus.

Harum velit eum rerum nemo unde. Nulla et quisquam autem inventore quae deleniti. Autem eius molestias nihil.

Ut recusandae velit voluptatem quae voluptas repellendus fugit. Provident numquam pariatur atque enim veritatis ut deserunt vitae. Consequuntur unde eum consequatur quis delectus facere. Dolores non quo recusandae at ducimus ab.

Career Advancement Opportunities

June 2026 Investment Banking

  • Evercore 01 99.4%
  • Moelis & Company 01 98.8%
  • JPMorgan 01 98.2%
  • Guggenheim Partners 01 97.7%
  • Morgan Stanley 07 97.1%

Overall Employee Satisfaction

June 2026 Investment Banking

  • Moelis & Company No 99.4%
  • Morgan Stanley 01 98.8%
  • Evercore 01 98.2%
  • BMO Capital Markets 12 97.6%
  • Banco Santander 01 97.1%

Professional Growth Opportunities

June 2026 Investment Banking

  • Moelis & Company No 99.4%
  • Evercore No 98.8%
  • Morgan Stanley 05 98.2%
  • JPMorgan No 97.7%
  • BMO Capital Markets 12 97.1%

Total Avg Compensation

June 2026 Investment Banking

  • Vice President (14) $434
  • Associates (43) $259
  • 3rd+ Year Analyst (8) $210
  • 2nd Year Analyst (22) $179
  • Intern/Summer Associate (13) $156
  • 1st Year Analyst (75) $151
  • Intern/Summer Analyst (65) $101
notes
16 IB Interviews Notes

“... there’s no excuse to not take advantage of the resources out there available to you. Best value for your $ are the...”

Leaderboard

1
redever's picture
redever
99.2
2
Secyh62's picture
Secyh62
99.0
3
BankonBanking's picture
BankonBanking
99.0
4
kanon's picture
kanon
99.0
5
dosk17's picture
dosk17
98.9
6
GameTheory's picture
GameTheory
98.9
7
DrApeman's picture
DrApeman
98.9
8
Betsy Massar's picture
Betsy Massar
98.9
9
CompBanker's picture
CompBanker
98.9
10
Jamoldo's picture
Jamoldo
98.8
success
From 10 rejections to 1 dream investment banking internship

“... I believe it was the single biggest reason why I ended up with an offer...”