MaxEpic

My landlords son is like this and they only own like 20 units.

Actually this is the worst type of person in real estate. The one who owns some piece of crap worth $850,000, has had it forever and doesn't run it quite as nice as a pro would, and thinks they are hot shit.

 
Funniest

Residential Realtors (and residential investors... many of who are wannabes) who think they understand commercial and investment real estate. OMG, some of the convos I've been stuck in. "Oh, I'm looking to buy a 100 to 250 apartment complex for a really good deal below market, at least a10% cap with upside, know any?"....

To be clear, this is not a general knock on Realtors or resi-investors (many are actually awesome).... just those who think they understand CRE and try and act like ballers when then are such obvious fakes.

 

I mean if you do find a place with an in place 10% cap rate and upside not priced in that’s not in a horrible location, I’d like to know too...

In all seriousness I’ve seen a lot of resi brokers try and do land deals or small strip malls and it almost always blows up.

“The three most harmful addictions are heroin, carbohydrates, and a monthly salary.” - Nassim Taleb
 

Best residential broker story I’ve encountered. Stereotypical residential agent, smoke show house wife, drives a “cute little” Porsche. She pulls up to the showing, Class A warehouse/ industrials. With her “client” aka HUSBAND, that owns a beverage canning company. She scraped by representing him, essentially he does all the work, including redlining the LOI AND her not even being on the calls during the negotiations. He ends signing 125k SF on a 10 year term. Then I get hit with her commission split asking for 4% for the tenant rep. fee.

 

Douchey structured finance bros. Can find some on the equity side as well, but come across more in debt for some reason. I feel like they have a chip on their shoulder for being in debt?

Not quite sure what it is, but it gets old dealing with these folks on transactions. I definitely keep a list to make sure these guys never get our future business again.

 

Hahaha soooo true. I know the exact kind of guy you’re talking about

I had a flair for languages. But I soon discovered that what talks best is dollars, dinars, drachmas, rubles, rupees and pounds fucking sterling.
 

Hahaha soooo true. I know the exact kind of guy you’re talking about

I had a flair for languages. But I soon discovered that what talks best is dollars, dinars, drachmas, rubles, rupees and pounds fucking sterling.
 

Is debt really that bad? I'm starting out as an intern this summer at one of the larger underwriters and I thought it would be a good experience to get better understanding of real estate just due to high deal flow and exposure. 

 

Count_Chocula

The shitty bucket shop debt guys who send me cold LinkedIn messages.  Sorry homie, but I'm not letting your little shitbag "firm" source debt for my $100m+ deal.  These fuckers are relentless.

I don't know.  Those guys are annoying as all hell and kinda laughable, but you have to respect the hustle a little bit.  I'd rather deal with them all day than the guy I know is out to screw me on something, or outright lying to me.  Not gonna ding hard workers, even if they're working at a boiler shop equivalent

 

Real estate industry has the biggest assholes 

 

East coast RE attorneys, especially nyc. Jesus Christ shut the fuck up for two seconds on the closing call so someone else can talk. They literally think they’re the smartest people in the word and want you to know it. Then they think they’re master negotiators when that’s not even their job. And the fees!! Oh my god the fees! This one fucker added the word “The” 80 times to the OA. Probably paying him $1200 and hour to do it.

 

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