Cover Letter Fail
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The title speaks for itself.
This got chain mailed around to most of the major BB's on Friday. This is a great example of what not to do if you ever want to work on Wall Street.
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As much of a douche bag I know this kid must be, I still feel kinda bad for these college kids who basically get black listed on Wall Street for life because of one stupid mistake.
What was that bit about Morgan Stanley when he wants to work at JP Morgan?
This guy shot himself in the foot, unfortunately. What a terrible cover letter.
Haha, my friend at JEF sent me this the other day. Priceless. The version she sent me wasn't redacted, so this kid's name was all over that email chain. Although he did bring this on himself, I still feel pretty bad for him because this is something that he might never recover from...
even if he got the names correct, the letter it self made him sound like a tool. if this letter fell on my desk the first thing I would say is "if hes so damn perfect why couldnt he get the names right...maybe I will call him in just to see the 35 pull-ups"
So you never made a mistake in your cover letter. What an achievement in life... Maybe you should try triple majoring in math, econ and CS and achieve a perfect GPA.
If he is indeed a triple math, econ and CS major, I just don\'t see the desire of going into investment banking. There\'s so much else he could be doing. I\'m sure he could get into a top notch econ or math phd program, become a quant, ... All of which sound a lot more appealing than IB.
haha sucks to be him
I don't get why people think bragging about pull-ups and a desire for difficult work will make employers pick them. Kid just sounds like a douche. If he doesn't realize that, then I can't really feel bad for him. Blacklisted haha.
I actually feel sorry for this kid. He does have some very impressive accomplishments and seems extremely dedicated and hard working, unfortunately he just clearly has a completely warped view of what is socially acceptable.
I loved the line about "being able to peform basic office functions with TERRIFYING PROFICIENCY." Classic.
Can he not sue JP Morgan for making this public?
Good luck finding the leak on this one. Plus, he's probably too embarrassed.
Just one more reason to keep your cover letters short and sweet.
Regardless, it had to either been leaked from his school or someone from JP Morgan leaked, since its clearly written for JP Morgan. The person wouldn't sue the individual who leaked it but he would sue JP Morgan for allowing it to be leaked.
just my 2 cents..
What happened to this kid? Did he get blacklisted or just made fun of?
I mean, he's enthusiastic and probably well intentioned. I don't understand how this sort of thing happens though...didn't he show this to one other person before sending it off? I mean, career services can be terrible, but I don't think even the most ill-informed office would green-light that.
The cover letter is almost a "check the box" sort of requirement. So long as it doesn't command attention, it will likely never be read.
Bullet points would have served him well
Exactly. I mean this kid is fucking talented. Plus he should have not written all that egoistical stuff. But who the fuck does this? I mean doesn't JP Morgan have compliance/IT people making sure that this does not happen?
HE, this dude, should try to find out who leaked this make sure they never work at JPM again.
My friend knows this kid hahaha. His resume is apparently shit
I'm all for auto dinging this kid for this go-round so he learns from his mistake, but fuck don't axe murder a kid while he's down. Let him grow up and give him another chance.
.
Wow. Kind of cruel for this kid, I feel annoyed at the unprofessional HR who passed this around. Everyone makes mistakes at the start of their job hunting process. They should not have their personal details shown around like this. Says worse things about the company than the inexperienced kid.
I have personally seen a lot worse applications and thought the cover letter should get some points for trying to be different than the norm. Specially when he states in the end about egos being a huge liability, that made me smile since cover letters are all about bragging anyway.
guarantee it was an analyst/associate and not HR that passed it around
Well they are even bigger tools. But I guess that was expected. Hopefully they get a taste of their own medicine someday.
He wouldn't probably wouldn't have had to suffer it being passed around if he wasn't dumb enough to put JPM and MS in the same cover letter. The letter is more misguided than outright crazy (ala the Vayner video resume).
I don't think that you can fault the person who passed it along though, it's more likely a case where whoever read it sent it over to their buddy in the group, that person forwarded it to another friend, etc... It's not like the first person to read it just logged into their email and blasted it to a contact list called 'Wall Street'.
Also, a more humorous interviewer would have brought him in for an interview and asked him to demonstrate how he would go about sending a fax, placing a seamless order, and taking a pitchbook to the printers with "terrifying efficiency."
Whoever leaks this shit needs to be fired.
On a whole, I dont see a problem with this Cover Letter. Obviously the kid went overboard with the benching and pull up shit and could have def toned it down but seriously you are going to chain mail this shit? Just stupid. I would be mortified if I ever went back and reread my old letters, emails, etc when I first started trying to reach out to people, get a job. etc... (I cant imagine what my college entrance essay said...)
This isnt Jeffery Chang worthy.
i got this one in email
hysterical
Sounds like he just wanted to really stand out from the crowd, which is understandable given how insanely competitive this recruiting season has been...
I've helped a few kids with their cover letters this year, and some of the first drafts have been absolutely terrible. Maybe this kid just didn't have anyone helping him out. Plenty of guys in finance take oversized pride in how much they can bench - this guy's problem was that he thought it would sound great on paper.
I agree that whoever leaked this was an ass. Probably killed this kid's chances to get his foot in the door...
It's not like people are going to remember a name from a funny email for very long. What's stopping this kid from getting his act together and applying again a year from now?
I work in investment banking and feel very sorry for the guy. I was actually forwarded the entire application package, which included the student's resume, cover letter, real name and contact information. He is literally a triple major with a cumulative 3.95 GPA at NYU. In a different time and a different place, this is the type of candidate who can earn interviews in the toughest of market environments and even potentially land a GS/MS offer. Aside from the JPM/MS gaffe, there were essentially no game-killers on the cover letter. Although the cover letter was certainly a bit tawdry, I would have interviewed this gentleman based on his resume and passion.
Heck, we all know the feeling when we want something so bad that we are willing to go the extra yard. IMO, those who haven't pushed themselves to the horizons of their limits haven't tried hard enough... I can honestly say I am one of the most professional and conforming member of my class - but even I can relate to what this kid felt. After all, who hasn't liked a girl so much that he has acted a little foolishly? Who hasn't tried to impress someone so hard that you go out of your way to get noticed? I honestly feel bad for this guy. Here is a guy who has done everything right academically and professionally - but wanted to go the extra step and craft an unique cover letter to get noticed. I certaintly cannot fault him on effort and intention. Because of one selfish person, this kid's future in investment banking is ruined. Sometimes the world isn't really fair.
this. +1
You make great points, VC. If you were to interview him, would you mention the cover letter? Just curious. He definitely has the passion, but my concern would be that if he landed interviews using this letter he wouldn't learn his lesson. Obviously that doesn't mean it deserved to get thrown around Wall Street, but nevertheless I'd be worried that it enforces the wrong message? Again, just curious to get your perspective.
NYU? LOL. Reminded me of Aleksey Vayner with a touch of "terrifying" writing.
But the kid did seem genuine in his cover letter which makes me feel kinda bad for him.
i just can't imagine how terrible it would be to work with that guy. cover letter setting off fit alarms all over
But honestly, shouldn't the person in JPM get sue for doing this.
Can someone please paste the text. I can't follow the link for some reason.
Have you tried this link: http://finance.yahoo.com/news/tenacious-summer-analyst-applicant-got-la… (it's an image so can't copy-paste).
I'm sympathetic to the guy. He was trying to stand out and just over did it.
Yup this works, thanks!
Good read. Just forwarded it around my office so everyone could get a good chuckle. Thanks!
wow.....proofread people, proofread
He seems smart. I'm sure he'll end up at a top-notch quant fund and his co-workers will laugh about it with him.
Who does this shit? I can't even comprehend -- why does it keep happening?
Got this email earlier this week, too. This got around ridiculously fast, the joke was in the email itself as it had comments from each forwarder. By the time it got to me the chain had already reached over 300 people just in mine alone. He's definitely been blacklisted by a number of banks on the street.
Sad thing is that his resume was forwarded around with the cover letter and it was actually pretty impressive.
Honestly this is hilarious, but nothing even close to the Vayner video.
I mean there are so many gems in this letter though.
\"Can perform basic office functions with terrifying efficiency\\"
\"That semester I achieved a 3.93, and in the same time I managed to bench double my bodyweight and do 35 pull-ups.\\"
\"I am unequivocally the most unflaggingly hard worker I know, and I love self-improvement.\\"
He also says he wants to work for Morgan Stanley later in the CL, even though it is a letter to JP Morgan.
i got this thing forwarded to me--came with his resume too. nothing impressive whatsoever. PWM experience was his last internship.
oh and the email chain came with a fucking hilarious picture from his facebook page that they found. the chain was classic
35 pull-ups really isn't that impressive...
Reading the actual email chain was almost as good as the cover letter. I would have interviewed him based on his bench press alone.
For what it is worth, the PDF file with the resume and cover letter have some sort of internal code on them. It is labeled NYU CareerNet / 2012 IB Risk Resume Bundle. The cover letter is page 255 and the resume page 256. This tells me that there were at LEAST 128 applicants from NYU alone.
delete
This should serve as a reminder that IB is a small world and the degree of separation is very small.
whatever man, my junior year SA recruiting season was october '08. A ton of jackasses of this calibre (based on the older dudes in my frat) became BB associates and have moved on to HF's/PE's. I dont think they would have had it as easy graduating '10....
Either way, people seem to forget how retarded they were a couple years ago (including me, nobody is born knowing how to NOT be an idiot). it seems the recession has weeded out people who make mistakes at a tender age (although fuck, who mentions your max bench in a cover letter?/?). Fuck though, im sure a lot of people grow from their initial immature mistakes to being highly succesful, right?
Im not sure wether to feel sorry for the kid or not; his 30 year old self does not deserve to pay for his 20 yr old (naive) mkstakes....
the kid got an offer from Renaissance Technology guess he showed the haters, first kid from NYU to work at the firm
I almost took this seriously.
Good for him! He can do much better than banking anyways :D
finance.yahoo.com/news/tenacious-summer-analyst-applicant-got-laughed-at-by-everyone-else-on-wall-street.html
this kid's letter makes me feel like shit.
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