How tall are you and how does your height affect your life

Male, 5'10. I consider myself good looking and I work out at least 4 times a week. But girls just want the tallest boys:
"You're pretty cute but you're not that tall, I want someone who's at least 6'2" been hearing that for a while now.
I know I shouldn't care but it annoys me so much because every time I see a pretty girl, 80% of them say the same shit.

So, to all the guys out here, how does your height affect your love life ? Do you have a "easy" dating life cuz you're tall or you still have some difficulty getting girls?

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Comments (131)

Aug 25, 2021 - 5:28pm

6'2" yeah i guess i'm happy. it doesn't matter much to me.

The way I see it, if I didn't pursue a girl just because she's taller than me, I'd be excluding a hell of a lot of possibilities, so I don't really make a big deal about it, although admittedly, if there is a large difference, like she's 6'3 or above or something, that might be a bit awkward, but I haven't yet faced that situation.

  • Analyst 2 in RE - Comm
Aug 25, 2021 - 5:32pm

5'9", dude what girls are you attracting/approaching? Never heard this in my life and do well. What kind of person says that to someone straight up as well? 

Most Helpful
  • Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
Aug 25, 2021 - 5:43pm

This question gets asked once every other week. Give it a rest. Look, you are average height so being insecure about your height is even more absurd than dudes that are like 5'4 complaining. 

Realistically, women in their 20's want to have fun and are going for guys they find most attractive. Much like men being obsessed with girls looks. Being short makes you less physically attractive, accept that truth and move on. Some people are 10/10's, you aren't from a looks perspective. Fortunately, much in the same way you don't exclusively care about a girl being attractive and value things like girls being supportive, fun to be around, smart, kind etc. so do women! Further fortunately, being able to financially provide becomes increasingly important to women as they age. Additionally, as guys age their dating pool gets bigger since most women are open to dating men older than them. So while in your 20's it might be some women say they will only date men taller than them and that makes you have a small population of datable people, once you get to your 30's you can date all 20's and 30's women.

So, in conclusion, being a short dude means less game in your 20's, but if you get wealthy and as people mature it equalizes. Also, on a related topic: why the hell would you want to date a girl who cares that much about height? Doesn't that scream superficial and stupid to you?

Outside of the women thing, unless you were bullied as a kid, so you have confidence problems, it doesn't affect any other area of your life. The whole height earnings gap is more confidence and nutrition based than a legitimate bias in terms of how people view you. If you are smart and confident people will respect you in business, otherwise they won't.

As a 5'10 dude, it likely affects you by preventing your NBA dreams, but that's about it barring the confidence issue you might have.

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Aug 27, 2021 - 3:49am

This question gets asked once every other week. Give it a rest. Look, you are average height so being insecure about your height is even more absurd than dudes that are like 5'4 complaining. 

Realistically, women in their 20's want to have fun and are going for guys they find most attractive. Much like men being obsessed with girls looks. Being short makes you less physically attractive, accept that truth and move on. Some people are 10/10's, you aren't from a looks perspective. Fortunately, much in the same way you don't exclusively care about a girl being attractive and value things like girls being supportive, fun to be around, smart, kind etc. so do women! Further fortunately, being able to financially provide becomes increasingly important to women as they age. Additionally, as guys age their dating pool gets bigger since most women are open to dating men older than them. So while in your 20's it might be some women say they will only date men taller than them and that makes you have a small population of datable people, once you get to your 30's you can date all 20's and 30's women.

So, in conclusion, being a short dude means less game in your 20's, but if you get wealthy and as people mature it equalizes. Also, on a related topic: why the hell would you want to date a girl who cares that much about height? Doesn't that scream superficial and stupid to you?

Outside of the women thing, unless you were bullied as a kid, so you have confidence problems, it doesn't affect any other area of your life. The whole height earnings gap is more confidence and nutrition based than a legitimate bias in terms of how people view you. If you are smart and confident people will respect you in business, otherwise they won't.

As a 5'10 dude, it likely affects you by preventing your NBA dreams, but that's about it barring the confidence issue you might have.

Sorry to say this, but using economic status to compensate for one's insecurities and attract others is the worst mistake you can ever do in dating, this opens doors to people who can take advantage of you. Especially if you are aiming for a serious relationship.

Way better to show yourself as a bright, confident and cultured person.

"Anyway, four dollars a pound"

  • Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
Aug 27, 2021 - 9:21am

It's not using money to compensate it's literally just having a job and your shit together as you hit 30 all of a sudden becomes something women care about, when before then it's not a priority. You don't have to be like flashing money lol, simply having career goals and the ability to send your future kids to a school they want is a trait that most women find very important post 30. Theres a difference between being a gold digger and a woman simply wanting a guy that has his shit together and can financially provide. Personally, I think being able to hold a steady job and save and pay for your kids pairs with being a good future father, so all women should care about it unless they plan on being the primary breadwinner which most women don't want.

Oct 27, 2021 - 5:34pm

>Realistically, women in their 20's want to have fun and are going for guys they find most attractive.

Guys really need to lower their expectations, their early 20s won't be as much fun as their female counter-parts. Just accept this. Dudes need to use this time to get their life in order: hit the gym, focus on school or career, learn to cook healthy foods, read, etc and start learning about things like stoicism, etc instead of digging deeper into Black Pill/Gen Z nihilism. 

  • Analyst 1 in IB-M&A
Oct 27, 2021 - 5:58pm

Depends how you define fun, but sorta agree. Honestly think it's more a pro than a con for men. Would you rather have dating get better with time or worse?

Just from a dating standpoint, pretty scientifically proven guys have an easier time as they get older and girls have a harder time. As a young guy, you aren't mature, have less financial resources, and are less confident, all of which are huge things women look for in dating.

  • Analyst 1 in IB - CB
Aug 25, 2021 - 8:02pm

5' 7. I've always tried harder without knowing it, in everything (sports, lifting, academics, girls), and I definitely think some of this has to do with being small. I'm fairly handsome though and was blessed with a deep voice, so that's always helped with chicks. Still don't necessarily get my pick with women, and I know this. So I'm just smarter about the settings in which I have a better shot at talking up a cute girl. Also I've been very scrappy since a young age, again because I was a small kid and didn't want people to fuck with me

Aug 26, 2021 - 5:59pm

If you ask for a number during the day versus a bar, you'll probably pick up on the role of setting. In my experience, girls find it romantic if the guy they sit next to on an airplane asks for their number, but, if that same guy asks at a "mega club", his odds go down most of the time. It might be because people are more guarded in those settings, or because of the novelty of being asked out "randomly." 

Not sure what the reason is, but I think its pretty widely acknowledged. 

Array

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  • Analyst 1 in IB - CB
Aug 26, 2021 - 6:43pm

Yeah, so I mean everything is relative. If I'm at a club elbow to elbow with a bunch of normal sized humans I'm more likely to get overlooked (pun intended) and im not much of a presence at all as opposed to maybe at a Coffee shop or the gym. EDIT: while girls do prefer objectively tall men, their problem isn't necessarily "short guys." Most of the time they just want the guy to be taller than them.

  • Incoming Analyst in IB - Cov
Aug 26, 2021 - 1:29pm

Same boat here. Around 5'8" and my voice is deeper than any of my peers. It helps a ton especially on the phone. My height has given me no issues though anyway. All the girls I've liked have been short enough that it doesn't make a difference to them, and 5'0 to 5'4 is a large dating pool of women. Also if you're into Asian girls a lot of them aren't super tall. Never got the scrappiness but I walk pretty fast. 

  • Associate 2 in IB-M&A
Aug 25, 2021 - 8:15pm

Lol 6'2"is their minimum? That's 4.5% of men in the US. If you exclude guys who are taken, gay, incarcerated, too old, too young, and only include guys who are good looking, successful, etc most picky girls are probably excluding 99.5% of men from hook-ups or relationships. That's brutal lol.

I am 6' and haven't been turned down for being too short yet. I also think women don't really know what 6'2" looks like. It's very tall. My suggestion is get yoked as fuck.

Aug 25, 2021 - 8:22pm

If 6' is ever considered short by women that would be the end of the world as we know it. Also to OP, think about it this way; would you really want to be involved with a girl to whom a miniscule difference in height is a dealbreaker? 

Aug 25, 2021 - 9:10pm

72.5in barefoot at the doctor. Apparently being over 6ft is a big plus on Tinder.

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

  • Associate 1 in HF - Other
Aug 25, 2021 - 10:35pm

Well well well, sad news is, most boys in high school near my place would  be taller than you lol, young boys these days are giants. You do know that if you're 1 inch shorter than you're now, you will be categorised as 'manlet' lol. 5'10 for an adult male screams 20th century height, get lift or something so you can stand taller.  5'10 was average height couple of years ago, I'm pretty sure the average will be pushed to 5'11 or 6' toward the end of this decade. The world is moving so fast it leaves manlets behind lmao.

Back to the question, of course being taller give you hefty advantage in dating. All my tall friends (6'2+) have smooth dating life, they navigate very easily with cold approach or online dating, and they still have to put work on many aspects - getting fit, have career, etc. 

If 80% of hot chicks reject you on grounds on height, then focus on the remaining 20%.

Or maybe when they (the 80% hot ones) done have enough fun with 6'2+, and they hit the 30 y/o mark down the line, then you can scoop up those leftovers, it will be your turn then, definitely not now when they're in their primes. 

So do you wanna be an insecure 5'10 or a confident 5'10, or at least a stoic 5'10. Make peace with your height.

Aug 25, 2021 - 10:40pm

elsavage

Male, 5'10. I consider myself good looking and I work out at least 4 times a week. But girls just want the tallest boys:

"You're pretty cute but you're not that tall, I want someone who's at least 6'2" been hearing that for a while now.

I know I shouldn't care but it annoys me so much because every time I see a pretty girl, 80% of them say the same shit.

So, to all the guys out here, how does your height affect your love life ? Do you have a "easy" dating life cuz you're tall or you still have some difficulty getting girls?

Sorry, girls do not always want the tallest guy. It's how you make them feel.

SafariJoe, wins again!
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Aug 26, 2021 - 5:08am

I am 6" 2'

work: At most offices I am by far the shortest guy. I don't know where the other guys came from, but I never saw anyone in my own team who was shorter than me. This sounds weird, but that is what I experienced.

dating:
Most girls want a guy who is taller than themselves, this should be fairly easy to achieve in Anglosaxon countries. More difficult in Scandinavia, Netherlands and places like Germany, et al.
Taller girls do approach me, but I am really only attracted to shorter girls.

Other things:
I don't think anyone ever picked a fight with me, if you are a taller guy who lifts, no other guy will touch you (in all likelihood).

Aug 26, 2021 - 7:40am

The height issue bothered me in high school and younger but my issue compounded by looking ridiculously young for my age.  I physically matured much than later than all of my peers.  Being short did not stop me athletically because I worked hard at it and was always the best baseball player on any team I played on.  Being short and immature looking affected my confidence with women but only in high school and younger.  I tried to compensate by lifting weights and I think that helped a lot.

From college age and older, the height did not matter all that much and I did not have any trouble hooking up with females.  I developed much more confidence, as I got older and that is the key.  I am much older now and if I was single, I might try to hook up with taller females just to prove to myself I could do it. 

For the OP, if you are 5'10/good looking and not hooking up with females, you are doing something wrong.  If you think you will not succeed, you will fail more often than not.  A little bit of confidence goes a long way.

May be your lack of success is related to the universe of women, you are targeting.  If you are targeting models who prioritize physical appearance over anything, then you might have some issues.  If you are targeting females who put a high priority on education/career, the height issue is not going to be as important.  Women who are on the medical school and law school path, are probably going to be focused more on your potential for success than how tall you are.    

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Aug 26, 2021 - 8:24am

I would be single if I wasn't that tall, my fiancé said it flat out.  She also said an out-of-shape tall guy is better than a ripped short guy because one can be changed and the other can't.  I hope my short friends can find a girl who isn't this picky about it though.

Aug 27, 2021 - 11:04am

I get your point, but how many tall, out of shape guys who are around 30 will automatically start working out once they are in a relationship? If you're out of shape and someone you're dating makes you work out, don't date them; but if you're tall and out of shape and have a gf, if you start working out would you possibly be able to do better?

  • Analyst 1 in IB - Cov
Aug 26, 2021 - 9:26am

Dude, I'm 5'7 with a good body and have been told by many I am an attractive looking guy (I don't think so, I think I'm average). I go on a lot of dates and get attention from women. NEVER have I been told I was too short or never have I been shot down because of my height.

I did not have an issue with me height until I started reading the internet and discovered what a manlet was. If you can't get girls it's because you have a shit personality. Not because you're ugly and not because you're not tall.

Aug 26, 2021 - 1:21pm

5'8 but I'm huge (huge in a muscular way not in a fat way). I think being on the shorter side has helped me looking more muscularly developed compared to someone who is 6'2 and who has been lifting correctly for as long as myself. 

Online dating can be tough but like i said I'm huge so i have my niche i guess. IRL its not really a problem since i go for girls that are shorter than me anyway. But tbh if i was ever to have kids id like to have them with someone who is taller than me or at least as tall as me. 

I'm from Europe 

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Aug 26, 2021 - 5:10pm

cyberpunk

I am 6" 2'

lol wow you're 6 inches 2 feet - noice - sorry I couldn't resist 😂😂😂

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

  • 2
Aug 26, 2021 - 2:14pm

Oh great, another 5'10 motherfucker complaining about their height. Please shut the fuck up, you make us look so fucking cringe. I'm 5'10 and it's never had any sort of impact on my life, it's literally a non-issue, and I don't care to be with a girl that's so superficial as to expect a 6'2 guy to fall onto her door step. And some of you basement dwellers have never stepped outside it seems. The average height that's reported online is fake, there are so many ridiculously short guys out there that exaggerate their height by 2 inches, and so many guy shorter than 5'10 with really attractive partners, so it seems like the real problem is with you.

Aug 26, 2021 - 4:53pm

ConfusedGuru

Oh great, another 5'10 motherfucker complaining about their height. Please shut the fuck up, you make us look so fucking cringe. I'm 5'10 and it's never had any sort of impact on my life, it's literally a non-issue, and I don't care to be with a girl that's so superficial as to expect a 6'2 guy to fall onto her door step. And some of you basement dwellers have never stepped outside it seems. The average height that's reported online is fake, there are so many ridiculously short guys out there that exaggerate their height by 2 inches, and so many guy shorter than 5'10 with really attractive partners, so it seems like the real problem is with you.

May be this is a troll post.  It really does not make any sense that a 5'10 good looking guy can't get girls

  • 1
Aug 26, 2021 - 5:40pm

Yeah it has to be; in my experience, the majority of girls who are like 5'4/5'5 can't even tell the difference between 5'10 and 6'0 anyway. No way that "80% of girls" want a guy who is 6'2 or taller. I've got a lot of problems when it comes to dating, but my height has never been an issue, and in fact, in certain ethnic communities it's been an asset and I'm considered "tall-ish". Maybe this guy lives in the Netherlands or something lol

Aug 26, 2021 - 3:23pm

Statistically? Yes, your height affects your life.
But what are you going to do about it? Wear lifts all the time? Maybe a tall hat? Get one of those operations where they break your legs and stretch them out so you end up taller?

It's a bit like being born poor. Yeah, life would probably be a little easier if your dad were Ritchie Rich. But you gonna sit around and cry about it? Or are you gonna hustle and try to live your best life? You're probably not going to end up worth $100 million, but you sure can try.

Aug 30, 2021 - 1:04pm

stupid question but has anyone actually considered that operation?

It's $76K and you can gain up to 5 inches 

https://www.insider.com/men-paying-for-limb-extending-surgery-to-be-tal…

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

  • Analyst 1 in PE - LBOs
Aug 26, 2021 - 3:29pm

I am 6'5 and think it definitely helps with first impressions in the workplace (and networking events whilst at school). 

In my dating life it has definitely been something that women have said they have liked. 

  • Analyst 1 in PE - LBOs
Aug 26, 2021 - 3:35pm

Relatively so to both.

Edit: To add to being tall in the workplace - I have found a major downside to be men with 'little-man syndrome' who are always trying to flex on me and show dominance which I find totally weird. It's worse when its senior people at your firm lol...

  • Analyst 1 in PE - LBOs
Aug 27, 2021 - 2:38am

Very true. I go for taller and more curvy women personally. The petite look never did it for me - feels somewhat like a pre-pubescent girl

  • CEO in IB - Cov
Aug 26, 2021 - 5:03pm

I'm 5'10 and currently dating an extremely hot, semi-celeb dancer girl that is 5'9. Tell me about it. 

Physicality is crucial in any relationship, but it's not a deal breaker - unless you makie it that way.  Once you pass a teenager stage there is so much more you can offer to your partner, that any girl that dings you purely because of your height is proooobably not worth your time.

Aug 26, 2021 - 7:13pm

Ok but you're CEO level... the $$$ compensates for the 2 inch loss

Array

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Aug 26, 2021 - 7:21pm

I'm a 5'9 (Asian) dude and rarely hear this. I have good-looking friends (Anglo, black etc...) over 6 foot who can't get laid to save their lives.

Those girls are probably just looking for a reason to reject you and height is just the first thing that comes to mind. 

Truth is 99% of girls (under 5'10) would date a guy who was 5'10 if he ticked all of their boxes, and understood that his self worth is greater than most guys over 6'2. I guarantee you that if you were over 6'2 many of those same girls would says something to you like "Sorry, I only date guys with huge muscles. Sorry, I don't date guys who wear skinny jeans. Sorry, I only date guys with deep voices etc..."

If you present yourself as a deserving, centered dude that doesn't give a **** about their opinion, your going to realize that this excuse is complete BS and laugh it off. Do you think those girls would say the same thing to Tom Cruise or Zac Efron? No way. Unless they are testing you, or are actually taller than you, when they say that they only date guys over 6'2, they are basically saying "sorry, your perceived sexual market value is too low for me. I'm not going to give you the time of day, because I can do better."

Guys always need a logical "reason" for being rejected by girls. That is why when some dudes are rejected they started asking needy questions like "Am I not good looking enough for you? Do you only date rich guys etc..."

The truth is you probably didn't built enough attraction with these women before asking them out, trying to get them back to your place etc...Either that or they sensed weakness and insecurities. They just weren't feeling it with you for whatever reason man. Height is just the scapegoat for rejecting you.

Keep on going out there and improve your centeredness and stop worrying about your height. It's non-issue. If a 5'9 Asian dude with social anxiety can laid every weekend in one of the worst dating market for men in the US, you can too.

Aug 26, 2021 - 8:46pm

5'5" and it sucks.  BAD.  I wear lifts (they make me about 5'8") and am pretty ripped so that's helped somewhat, but just knowing that some 6'0'' douchebag can blow me out of the water no matter how well I think I'm doing whenever he feels like it kills my self-esteem time and again.  

Dating's been a nightmare.  I mostly date foreign women, who seem a bit more open-minded.  But I've never gotten THE girl. As in any I've really liked. You do lots of settling at 5'5". The only reason I'm neither a) suicidal nor b) an incel is because I'm pretty successful in other areas and have lots of great friends.  But don't get it twisted - the looks you get at 5'5", the lack of respect, and the constant friendzoning will always keep you uneasy.  

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Nov 17, 2021 - 11:48am

Same height. Never tried lifts (worth it?). But yeah I used to be in powerlifting a lot. I had a decent body, med school is busy so I scaled back, still in decent shape just not shredded. 

I have a decent body count but I have never been in a serious relationship. The girls that I get with are rarely that great. They aren't "IT". They aren't girls that I would proudly show my friends. I have been on dates with attractive girls but they never work out. My last "fling" was with this chubby girl, I didn't really want to cuff her but was stringing her alig because I wasn't sure if this was the best I could do.

I think  will just cling on to the next slim, decent looking girl that is into me and lock her down.

Interested in health tech, consulting, and entrepreneurship.

  • 2
Nov 17, 2021 - 10:35pm

Lifts are an acquired taste but I never leave home without them.  They're in all of my shoes.  Sneakers, too.  The confidence boost is probably as or more important than the height boost.  I may not ever get THE girl but once in a while I'll do OK.  But as I head into my 40s not sure what the playbook will look like.  Everyone my age is married, parenting, or both, and I'm too old for apps, clubs, hostels, and the like.  I barely got noticed in my 20s so not looking forward to 5'5'' at 40 at all.  

I suspect once you've got that "Dr." in front of your name your luck will get A LOT better.  

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Aug 26, 2021 - 9:16pm

6'2", which I reached around seventh grade. 

It helped me a lot with dating in my younger days. I was shy, skinny, zero style, normal looks - but I'd get a lot of girls compliment me on my height and shit like that, which gave my confidence when it came to approaching girls. 

I think that if you have your shit together (fit, well-dressed, well-spoken, sociable, look as good as you can), height will def. give you an edge - especially throughout your 20s.  

Aug 26, 2021 - 9:21pm

This is a funny one to me because I was always one of the smallest kids in grade school and starting out in high school, but I ended up at 6'2". I had a year between soph and junior years in high school where I basically grew a foot...my legs and back hurt a lot. It was even harder because my dad and cousins were all around 6'6" so I was really the runt in our family.

I had zero luck with girls (all of whom were taller than me) in middle school and early high school. Things got better later in life which I'm sure height and success with the confidence that it brought really helped, and being a college athlete is really where that started. That said, my wife is like 5'8" and her twin sister of the same height ended up marrying a guy who is like 5'7" so does it really matter? I also know some shorter guys who ended up doing really well in relationships. It's all about confidence at the end of the day.

I got more confident when I grew because it was new to me being bigger than most people for the first time of my life and because it made me much better in sports. I still think of myself as small because of my family, but I also can't drive a small car or fly economy comfortably so there are some disadvantages as well. 

  • 5
Aug 27, 2021 - 9:03am

A little over 6'3.  Sure, it helps in dating, but I'm also good looking and fit so it's not only the height.  The other weekend was having a conversation with some people about the dating scene in NYC and a woman said "well at your height you should never have a problem".  I feel like that's especially true here as people are quite superficial and transactional.  I generally prefer to date women 5'7+ - my 4 serious relationships were 5'7, 5'9, 5'10 and 5'7.  I also generally find women 5'9+ to be an underserved market, no matter how attractive they are.  A lot of men are too intimidated to approach a woman so close to themselves in height so they don't get hit on as much.  

Aug 27, 2021 - 9:13am

I'm somewhat flexible (I don't care between blondes and brunettes for instance), but I generally prefer women with a more curvy/full-figured build vs. very skinny.  I'm an ass guy to an extreme, and when I've dated women who have a super thin build I generally lose interest after a couple months.  

EDIT: Not sure why this didn't thread but this was a reply to jonjonsnow

Aug 27, 2021 - 9:32am

I'm going to regret feeding the troll.  

You asked me what my type was - I told you.  I also said I eventually lose my attraction to super skinny women.  You somehow (unsurprising on the internet) leapt to your conclusion above.  Not sure if you know what the phrase "type" means, but if you told me your type was Margot Robbie my first assumption wouldn't be that all of your exes were stunningly gorgeous blonde Australians.  

  • Intern in IB-M&A
Aug 27, 2021 - 9:46am

6 ft (183cm)

much like those girls want 6'2's exclusively, you should also set up a prerequisite for dating - only date intelligent people, not retarded entitled dimwits who want to exclude like 96% of all men. seriously, what tf is so exceptional that they can offer to the remaining 4%?

Aug 27, 2021 - 11:11am

Its like the NBA, the tallest person isn't the best option all the time, but you prob have to be at least a certain height to make the league (shoutout small King Allen Iverson). Dwyane Wade was 6'4 and got it done, not short, but somewhat short  by NBA standards (similar to 5'10 in the dating market)

Point is, if you're 5'1, dating is probably going to be hard for you. If you're 6'5, prob easier, but 5'10 can get it done if you bring other attributes. Also, if some woman is only going to date you for your height, you prob don't want to date that person. 

  • Analyst 1 in AM - Equities
Aug 27, 2021 - 3:12pm

Am 6'1". My family has a massive variability with height so I could have been a whole lot shorter. My grandfather (dad) was also 6 1. His five sons in order of age are 5 4, 6 5, 5 5, 5 9, and 6 1(my dad). 5 5 uncle has two sons who are 6 5 and 5 4 and look basically identical. 6 5 uncle has two sons who are 5 11 and 6 4. My mom is 4 10 (she unfortunately is one of those super short women who really only like tall guys). Genetics is variable as hell. Just focus on being you and you will be fine. Know plenty of guys 5 6 - 5 9 who got plenty of game and great luck with the ladies and guys who are 6 3 - 6 5 which is the borderline tall before going into nba territory who absolutely suck with it. 

Aug 27, 2021 - 3:43pm

6'4. D1 babies only. Happy is a relative term, I have had my highs and lows as we all have. I was very lanky growing up, but have filled out in recent years. It was a benefit in sports through high school and my undergrad sport (crew), it certainly helped. I must say walking around the Financial District in Boston, pre covid, there are many tall men walking around in suits. Some even taller than me. I think at work it has generally helped me, but if you are good at your job height really doesn't matter. The best data guy on our team is maybe 5'5. It helped with girls in my prior life, but happily taken now.

Few players recall big pots they have won, strange as it seems, but every player can remember with remarkable accuracy the outstanding tough beats of his career.
  • 1
Aug 27, 2021 - 3:50pm

I'm around 5'11 and I haven't ever had a girl complain about my height. I know they might wish for it internally, but who tf cares. They're lucky to be with a non-f boy who takes care of himself and makes good money. They're not going to have a lot of fun at 30 still being picky about landing a 9.5/10 guy, when they're a 7.

Caveat - I avoid girls who are 6ft+ altogether. I couldn't envision myself being with a girl that was taller than me, and most girls aren't. All girls ive dated have been 5'5 to 5'9.

What you'll find is that women fall in love with men who are in control and don't really have too many insecurities. You'll gain confidence as you make more money and have more time to take care of yourself.

Aug 27, 2021 - 4:33pm

Offering a women's perspective here; going crazy over height (that you cannot change) is literally bonkers and any woman who would value that over intelligence/personality is not worth it. Just my 2 cents

  • Intern in IB-M&A
Aug 27, 2021 - 5:17pm

One of my really good friends from HS was like 6'3, hot (no homo), hard working, had multiple girlfriends etc. You realise bro that these guys have lots of insecurities as well. Just work on yourself dude

  • Intern in IB - Cov
Aug 27, 2021 - 11:01pm

Lol I'm 5'7 Asian male, so the cuck ass of WS, but I've never let that stop me. Call it a Napoleon complex, but don't be scared and go after who you want, and you'll be fine. Understand life is short, As long as you're not a creep, if you ask someone out, the worst they can say is no. Don't be a dick and push forward lol. Don't give a shit about what other people think. 

PS, I don't ever work out. Just don't be a pussy. Take "no's" in stride, and never give up (within reason). 

Aug 28, 2021 - 2:18pm

I'm 5'7 barefoot and while my height has absolutely made athletics and to some extent dating more difficult, it has had 0 impact on my life beyond that. I used to be really insecure about my height when I was in HS/college, but have since grown (lol) out of that. Outside of my friends/coworkers making a few good natured ribs about me being the shortest male in most groups, I've never had issues with being seen as less competent or anything like that in professional settings to where I felt my height was what has been holding me back. I'd be kidding myself if I said some shit about how height isn't a deal breaker for a lot of women, but I also 100% believe it's more of a problem online than it is in-person. Women in general can afford to be hyper picky online, but I've found that in-person they usually just want you to be taller than they are, which even my short ass usually is.

Truth be told mate, if you're 5'10 and supposedly struggling with women because of your height, I bet it's actually because of your personality and them giving your height as an excuse for why they're not interested. In addition to being short, I'm pretty average looking and quite introverted (which frankly I think is more of a hinderance than height, but that's a topic for another day) but have had women who you'd think are way out of my league be into me just because I know how to get along with people and show legitimate interest in whatever they're into (i.e. a good conversationalist).  At 5'10, you're a good bit taller than even women who are considered statistically tall (5'7+), so outside of a few crazies that are obsessed with 6 footers or girls that are legitimately 5'9+, it shouldn't factor into their calculus very much. There's definitely something else wrong because it's only at my height or so that guys start being described as "short".

  • Intern in IB-M&A
Aug 29, 2021 - 5:52pm

5'9

Hard to assess your own attractiveness, but have been told I'm handsome. Have had a number of hot girls approach me over the years, but I squandered most of those opportunities because of shyness/lack of game. As far as I can remember, only 2 girls have called me short – both of them ended up asking me out anyways, so I wouldn't take comments like that too seriously. 

My advice would be to stop being a pussy. Good luck

Oct 27, 2021 - 1:10pm

Guys lie about their height all the time. I'm 5'7 and there's so many dudes that are way shorter than me claiming to be 5'6 or my height, even though I'm easily 2 inches+ taller than them. It's worst among dudes who are short (I think 5'8 or below is a reasonable cutoff for that) or guys that are in the 5'10-5'11 range and just missed the 6' mark. Most dudes over 6' don't lie about height.

It's actually funny because I've noticed that girls lie about their height nowadays too. I've noticed a fair amount of them claim to be 5'6 or 5'7 even though they're basically average height. I think it's because 5'7 or so is around the mark where women are considered tall and the minimum to be considered a model. It's funny how both guys and girls stretch the truth just to try to meet some arbitrary social convention of what's considered tall.

Oct 25, 2021 - 10:32am

6'3. Height most of my life didn't help me much with women. It alone is just another trait, like money, or being charismatic. But with other positives it's a force multiplier.

When I got to a low bf% and started lifting then yea world was basically an oyster and sex with chicks was a faucet could turn on and off at will. 

Oct 27, 2021 - 2:32am

I really wouldn't worry about it, man. There are so many factors to consider when it comes to this topic.

It's interesting seeing the other perspectives here because I'm 5'3 haha, and I have never really had "trouble" with women. I should add that I had the added bonuses of being a college athlete (soccer), then a wildland firefighter, a known "community" guy, about 220lbs at 20-22% BF, have some decent facial hair/straight teeth/nice smile, being black (thanks positive stereotypes lmao), and could switch pretty well between humor and introspection, which gave me a sort of "wise beyond my years" image to people as a first impression.

"Trouble" is also relative, however, so I'm sure there are millions of women that would say no to me, even with those "bonuses". I knew my demo and understood how to read when a girl/woman seemed interested though, so I built on that instead of dwelling on the fact that some other person may not like me because of my height. Personal preference isn't always a personal attack, and it helps to limit one's expectations to what is reasonably attainable when factoring in financial/professional status with your physical attributes.

In my experiences, any "No" relating to height went like: "I'd f**k you, but I wouldn't date a shorter guy", "Uhhh yeah, not my type", or "You're cute. I'd probably give you a chance if you were taller". It didn't bother me because there always are others, and the pursuit is in itself a game until you're serious about it and want to settle down, which I wasn't at the time (now happily married).

Not to mention when going out with my friends that were 6'6, 6'4, and 6'9, I still witnessed rejections on their part. When out with a couple of friends that were legit male models, they still got rejected. When with my buddy who was an Army Ranger and built like a silverback, the same thing. Or even when with my younger brothers (one 5'11, one 6'0), I still sometimes got lucky over them, and vice versa. Either way, at the end of the night we would all just laugh about it because none of it really matters and some things make better stories than realities.

(Side note: I'm not sure if other shorter guys experienced this too, but a lot of late 20s, 30s, and 40s women seemed to be more attracted to/aggressive when approaching me over women who were my age too.)

Sure, the women I've dated or slept with weren't all "dimes", and they ranged from 18-48 age-wise and 4'9-6'0 height-wise depending on the year and the phase I was in, but the fact is the rule of 33 is true for even the tallest, best-looking dudes, generally speaking. Some women who like you will be stunning, some "average", and some could cause you to potentially rethink your drinking habits, lol.

But that's all this is. It's a game until it isn't and you're ready to get serious about forming a legitimate connection. And believe me, the last woman you want anything serious with is one who puts your height or anything physical before your interpersonal and intrinsic qualities. I promise you won't care nearly as much about this in a few years, especially when you get to experience a genuine connection with another person.

In the meantime, I get your wanting to pursue the pretty girls now, and I wish you well. I also hope you can understand that pretty is more of a spectrum than a hard definition, and that you could be missing out on some solid gals while trying to appeal to the ones who simply don't prefer you.

Addressing everyone now: No one ever notices what you consider to be flawed more than you do because they're focused on the same internal dialogue with their supposed flaws, but your self-criticism creates pseudo-reality wherein said self-appointed flaws are the only things you think others can see, which then bleeds into how you interact with others (especially of the opposite sex). So the issue isn't and never really was your height, so much as how you perceive it and decide to work with it. If I, a borderline dwarf, can understand this concept, you average to tall apes had better get with it too 😂

Nov 5, 2021 - 1:08pm

Have you been built/muscular your entire life? If not, did you ever receive shit from other men over your height? I think height and size is twofold - men and women can treat you differently.

But can also speak to height not being anything. I'm 6'3 but didnt really get into fitness/lifting until early 20s. Before then being tall itself isnt really much, and other dudes would challenge me all the time - often shorter dudes as well. While height matters to a degree Id argue that if you're a male lifting is the most important thing you can do. It will always be a trait valued by both women (protection) and men (intimidation).

Nov 5, 2021 - 2:59pm

I absolutely have not, lol. Until about 11th grade, I was sitting at 130lbs soaking wet. During that 11th grade summer, I decided I wanted to be the strongest player on the field (which isn't hard since it was soccer), so I went insane with lifting and whatnot. By 12th grade, I was 16 years old and 165lbs of relatively solid, lean muscle (I was way more diet-obsessed at that time).

Moving from an inner-city school to the suburbs for high school had already essentially killed my ego and prepared my repartee because kids who grow up with nothing often only have language as a form of expression/protection. I was roasted ad nauseam there, so nothing the kids (especially the guys) at the suburban school said would actually hurt my feelings. Some of it was hilarious though, and I embraced the hilarity of it, but I also would punch back from time to time if what they said couldn't make me laugh. I was careful with that though because there are major cultural differences between black and white kids when it comes to allowable banter--at least back then, before social media had everyone on the same cultural wavelength.

I also happened to be an athlete that could hang with the best of them (ran a 4.45 40 + 38in vertical once upon a time), however, was relatively known for my sense of humor, and never carried myself insecurely. Many people weirdly assumed I was taller than I was, but I had heard of the same phenomena when hype-successful or confident men who are shorter present themselves as who they are. Not saying I'm like them at all--I think I'm just comfortable/realistic about who I am. I never perceived my height as a net-negative because I had only ever been myself, and hadn't really experienced "suffrage" for it except for at the inner-city school.

I will say, however, that I think it would likely be hardest to be a shorter white man than a black one for a slew of cultural reasons; some of which I saw first-hand when out with my white friends who were close to my height (because they lack the positive racial stereotypes). There is an assumption about lacking masculinity, and the guys I knew had been through the wringer growing up (not in the toughen you up way), so they wore their insecurity in how they walked, talked, and interacted with others.

You're 100% on point about how putting on muscle weight changes how people interact with you. The dynamic between me and other dudes changed dramatically when I came back after that Junior year summer and was 40lbs heavier, stronger, and "better looking" through that lens. It's very strange, but it is almost like getting bigger turned the little side jokes into statements of concurrent envy/admiration. I wish I could say I was kidding or like it was a special case, but I don't think it is for anyone who gets into lifting.

Specifically, I've noticed through the years how I'll be having a regular conversation with a guy and he'll bring up that he needs to get back in the gym out of literal nowhere or will make borderline sexual comments about my physique (old white dudes still always love to tell me I look like a wrestler/running back haha).

Or, it'll be something like "We should arm wrestle", or "What do you bench?", or "I know I'm skinny now, but I definitely want to put on weight soon". All the while, I legitimately lift like a granny now (injuries) just to maintain what I have and to stay active/mentally fresh during the day. I barely even think about lifting weights anymore as a #1 in my life.

When I was lean, my options were still a little more limited, but putting on "man" weight, growing out some facial hair, keeping my hair cuts super low, and maturing a bit really helped me most. My father-in-law assumed I was 30 when he first met me, and I was 23 at the time.

I've also noticed that men who are more insecure, tall or not, almost look at muscular dudes as a final authority on certain things. Things where I previously would've been laughed out of the room. It's very strange, but especially in leadership roles or jobs where physical strength mattered (wildland firing, trail work, landscaping) was I looked at in a sort of "admirable" way. It made me very uncomfortable, not gonna lie lol.

The biggest change though is where a guy will make a short joke (not knowing that I've heard it all and it doesn't bother me) but will quickly follow up with "Just kidding, man!" That is something that never happened when I was the kid you could basically throw over your shoulder.

In summation, I would honestly say the dynamic with men changed 10x more than with women. I think my more "yolked dad" physique now is more desirable for women for whatever reason, which is whatever since I'm married. Apart from that, though, my status with many men has shifted tremendously and it's super weird a good chunk of the time, but I try to lean into all of it with humor for my own sake.

Nov 17, 2021 - 11:53am

Yes Most of the women I been with have been older. I am currently in my mid 20s and been with more women over 30 than under 30.

Interested in health tech, consulting, and entrepreneurship.

  • Associate 3 in IB - Cov
Oct 27, 2021 - 11:59am

I'm 5'5", out of shape and not attractive. I've always been extremely lucky with women. I'm married to an absolute stunner (she's also a genius and is C Suite at a maturing startup, currently pregnant again)

My secret? I'm funny and I'm kind. Girls don't care what you look like when their eyes are closed from laughing. And they also love a man who can take care of them.

You don't want the ladies who only care about height. But to attract the right type of partner, you need to be a good person.

Oct 27, 2021 - 4:14pm

6'2" and average looking. I work out but am not super muscular. Working on getting more defined as I've put on post-wedding weight. Anyways, being tall has advantages for sure. My wife loves that I'm tall and "All-American" looking. Idk. I've seen tall uggos pull better than short fit dudes. I've also seen the reverse. Personality can overcome height.

Nov 5, 2021 - 1:10pm

Whats your current routine look like? As a fellow tall guy you wont believe the spike in interest if you get into lifting seriously.

You dont need to be massive or anything. But after a year or so of solid lifting you should have shoulders and chest extending beyond waist, and developed lats for a V Shape. Once you achieve that the world is your oyster

Nov 5, 2021 - 12:08am

Wow 

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

Nov 5, 2021 - 8:57pm

Watch what women do, not what they say. Women live to view themselves as less shallow than men but they are every bit the same. 

That said, men do have more latitude to win women over with personality, career, and confidence than women do with men. But women are absolutely harsh when it comes to judging guys in terms of physical attraction. Dont buy the bs they give you about being nice or being funny. You want women? Develop an edge, get lean, build muscle. Youll be surprised how much this 'improves' your personality

Nov 5, 2021 - 8:26pm

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