Coming to terms with no return offer
Hi monkeys
I wanted to get some advice / reality checks on my situation, as I know I’m thinking about it the wrong way
I did a SA stint in BB IB most recent summer, but due to a couple of different issues I didn’t get a return offer. I won’t go into too many details but after speaking to some of the analysts in my team, they said they were shocked I didn’t get it.
If I’m being honest I definitely think I did poorly, I was going through some heavy personal issues that unfortunately came up right around when I started
Regardless, I made sure not to wallow in self pity for too long and went hard on FT recruiting. Got an offer for a MM bank that’s strong in a specific industry that I was set on being in
I know I should be happy, but I’m struggling to accept that I’m in an OK spot. For example, I will get paid six figures all-in, better than most people out of college, but all my dumb ass thinks about is the fact that my comp is going to be well below street especially after all these recent comp changes
Or, rather than viewing the fact that analysts have moved from this firm move to BB as a positive, I see it as a downside that I’m not on the best path I could be on / limiting myself as I won’t be able to get into an investing seat as there isn’t much of a track record of it here
A lot of it is comparison (yes thief of joy etc., I understand) against a lot of my friends going to BB, especially in this lateral market where friends are going from less coveted roles into BB, and for whatever reason I see this as another reason to feel bad that I didn’t make the cut
Clearly as you can tell there are issues I need to work through personally, the point of this post is to put it in writing and hopefully get people telling me why I’m a moron / how to better think through this - have been going to therapy separately for the issues mentioned previously
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What do you mean no one gets do overs? People will literally come out of prison and start a brand new life for themself, gtfo with there’s “no do-overs” life’s one big do-ever if anything lmao
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Cheer up, you're in a great spot... because it's a spot that -- if you satill want to get to a BB -- this place can get you there.
When I first started reading your post, I figured you were still without a job. But dude, you've got a BB job at an MM! No, it's not the most prestigious job you could have had, but who cares? Better than 99% of college grads out there, from a comp. perspective. You can't let 10 or even 20 grand a year when you're young skew your perspective. You've got a great job that pays great that will catapult you to an even better job (if you end up not liking your current job). So instead of viewing it as a bad thing, consider yourself lucky -- you said you performed poorly last summer, yet you still emerged with a very good IB job. Learn from your past mistakes, work hard at new job, have a good attitude and you'll be in great shape to rise at your current job or lateral to somewhere you deem more desirable... dude, you're golden.
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