My summer in investment banking was like being in The Hunger Games:
Dropped into an arena with 30 other interns to battle it out over a ten week period. The weak drop like flies in the harsh environment. Survivors get the sweet sweet nectar of a return offer.
First a bit about me - interned at elite boutique in nyc last summer, incoming full-time PE analyst.
Looking back - it really didn’t have to be that bad. Few pitfalls to avoid:
1. Not writing down stuff you’re doing for future resume bullet pts
It is CRUCIAL to keep track of the work that you’re doing over the summer so that you can craft detailed resume bullets & speak intelligently about your experience in future interviews.
Buyside recruiting starts during training of Analyst Year 1 - so get your resume in shape ASAP. Take 30min at the end of every week and scribble down notes on the deliverables you worked on, meetings you developed materials for, etc.
2. Trying to train for a marathon
Your top three priorities should be 1. Mental & physical health, 2. Making new relationships, and 3. Getting the return (in that order). Not possible to fully succeed at all three while trying to cram in another big goal like training for a marathon - speaking from personal experience…
3. Disorderly eating (forgetting to eat / stress overeating)
You order dinner, get assigned task by your associate, start on task, pick up dinner when it arrives in lobby, feel pressure to finish task so let dinner sit on your desk for the next 2hr …next thing you know it’s 10PM and you’ve eaten half your burrito bowl.
Order food early and set boundaries. Not worth being hangry and having your energy and mood ruined. Tell your associate that you’re stepping away for 10min to chow down dinner.
4. Never leaving desk
Get up every hour and take a few laps around the office. Step outside and call your mom for 5min.
Everyone is so caught up in their own work that they don’t even notice. Even if you’re slammed - the re-energizer for your brain to step away for a few and take your mind off things pays off.
5. Not annoying my analyst / associate more
I spent way too much time “spinning my wheels” trying to figure things out on my own. Set a rule for yourself that if you feel like you’re being super inefficient or progressing way too slowly - swing by their desk after no longer than 20min to have them walk you through it.
Do you think the return offer is yours to lose as an intern?
depends on how fucked your bank is at planning headcount
no that is a complete and utter lie you can not get the return for ANY reason and anyone else who says otherwise is lying to your face
Good points. Will also add not drinking caffeine too fast. Take gentle sips……. I’ll never forget an associate was explaining something to me half hour after I had eaten and shit was turtling in and out of my asshole. You know that feeling of how one fart would send you over the edge like a firecracker? Exactly what was happening to me. Had to sit up and position my pelvis so shit would not pour out.
Walked as stiffly as possible to the restroom and thankfully no one was in there because I actually shit myself slightly on the trek over to it……
How does shifting your pants in the office effect your chances of getting a return?
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