Living situation
Currently a senior at a university on the west coast, starting FT in June at an IB in NY. I’m originally from New Jersey and now that my job will be in NY, my parents want me to live at home with them. It takes ~ 45 mins to get to the office by subway from where I live. I am opposed to the idea of living at home as I feel like I will be missing out on experiencing the city and young adult life, but at the same time, I don’t want to hurt my parent’s feelings. Has anyone been in a situation like this? / how difficult would it be to commute to the office for 45 mins and manage work stress with living with parents?
Your parents will be fine. Living with them will certainly save you a ton of money, but I think after college it's time to be your own man and move out. Living in the city with new people in a tiny shit apartment that costs half your income is a character-building experience that has real benefits.
If you wanted to live at home to save rent, that'd be one thing and I'd say 45 minutes is juuuust close enough to be doable with IB but still a major hassle, however it sounds like you don't want to live there.
I'd tell them your hours will be too long to come back and forth every night - point out to them the difference in sleep between a 10 min and 45 min commute when you're leaving the office at 3am and back by 9am. Family is important but you do have to set some boundaries based on what you want vs. what they want.
If your office is hybrid at all you could go work there some days/weeks as a compromise, I imagine it'd be better for WFH days than a tiny NYC apartment anyway
I think you're just going to have a lot of FOMO if you choose to live with your parents. Yeah, the cost saving is real, but everything else is a lot more convenient when in the city (working, going out,...etc). I'd try to land a place close to the office though - ideally you want the commute to be under 20 mins if you're banking.
Also, 45 min to NJ sounds optimistic, especially when you're going to try to be leaving the office at 2am.
Like someone above posted, why not try to WFH at your parents? Would be a decent compromise and you'd get a lot more sleep.
Lot of bad answers here.
Why is everyone on this thread saying he will leave the office at 2am. No one stays past dinner anymore in the office and if you are somehow at a bank that still does you have a shit culture frankly and should bounce.
If you can manage to be a minimum 2 days of the week WFH, then I think it's worth it to stay home. All those comments about FOMO or character building living in a shit apartment with roommates in a box that costs 2k/mo. is a bullshit outdated argument. World has changed. Maybe you plan to work in this industry your whole life and be promoted at every step of the way so those financial decisions are inconsequential but I try to be a realist. Also this assumes you have a good relationship with your parents which it sounds like you do given you care about their feelings and they are happy to have you at home (not common in the ass backwards US culture towards family)
If you are somewhere with awful culture that's forcing you 5 days a week still then you unfortunately have no choice and will have to get something in the city.
No bonus is ever guaranteed. Who knows if you can even make it a full year? Maybe I'm too cautious. But I've seen too much to put my full faith and financial decisions based on the perceived rewards of a "career" overtime at some random point in the future. Again, maybe I'm a pessimist or jaded and this says something more about me but I like to be a realist.
My friend. It would be more traditionalist to keep your kids in home longer. Thats how its done in southern Europe. Not in a progressive kind of idelogical way, but in a backwards kind of way.
UpSeT mY pArEnTs... So how long are you planning on living with your mom man? til you make VP? by then you'll be living at home to take care of them.
Look... the amount of money you will save by staying with them is real... could be as high as $24,000 post tax or more.
That being said if you're in a sweaty sweat group, that 1.5 hour subway travel a day could leave you with well under 4 hours at home to sleep/shower/get dressed a day.
you're going to ant to be in manhattan. youre going to want to be your own man. to date.
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