Overheard weird conversation while working as a part-time barista from kid who drove 4 hours to meet some guy for coffee and then couldn't afford it?
For context I go to an Ivy but am originally from Pennsylvania so work as a barista in a starbucks when I'm home. I was working there the other day then this flustered, autistic and scrawny looking kid came in looking to meet some older guy. Anyway, the kid comes in a couple hours before we opened and I told him we aren't open yet, but then he said no worries he's looking to reserve a seat as he has a really important meeting coming up. I thought that was a bit weird but I let him inside and take a table. He also mentioned that he'd driven 4 hours through the night so he could get here early enough and make a good impression on the guy he was meeting. I thought this was kinda weird but I left him to it.
Anyway, a couple hours later the guy he was meeting shows up. The kid rushes to him and gets down on his knees and starts worshipping him. I thought this was super weird. Anyway the kid then runs to the counter and demands 7 coffees, 1 for him and then 6 for the guy and the rest of his team. I say okay and start making them, but then when the kid tries to pay, his card declines. He then starts screeching and says that he only has $3 left as his spent his savings on gas for the trip here. The guy who he's meeting, I think its a guy in finance?, is kinda weirded out and offers to pay himself.
Anyway, I serve them the coffees and as I do I briefly overhear more of their conversation. The older guy is a Senior Manager in KPMG Audit and the kid is trying to do some networking. He is practically begging the guy for a referral there. He says he has 6 internships before Freshman year at College and he is about to attend a HYP, but is worried about the job market as one of his friends from the College Asian Society had 13 internships before College but was only able to land UBS, so he wants to do everything to up his chances. He then starts listing off answers to questions in the advanced merger model section of the 400Qs, as well as reading out word for word the LBO chapter in Pearl and Rosenbaum to impress him with his technical skills. The KPMG guy is insanely weirded out now, but to try and steer the conversation back to something normal, he asks the kid what he likes doing for fun. The kid replies that the likes to watch Football, as well as doing recreational ski jumping during the winter, as the WSO and M&I behavioural interview guides told him that he should have a normal popular hobby to fit in with people and a niche hobby to stand out. The KPMG guy looks completely alarmed. As a last resort he asks the kid what brings him to Pennsylvania as he noticed the kid mention he's from California. The kid then says he came here to meet him, and he has planned a 20-city road trip around the US, with coffee chats planned around the country. He says it's never too early to network.
The KPMG guy has had enough now and says he has an urgent meeting and has to leave. Once he leaves, I observe the kid spend the next 5 hours sat in the coffee shop writing up notes from his conversation. As it's now closing time, I tell the kid he needs to leave. He thanks me for letting him stay there and he mentions he's now got a 7 hour drive to Boston to meet an Operations Associate at JPM.
The stereotypes of hardcore forum users having literally ZERO life really ring true
The fact that I think this is the 5th troll today about the initial post is something to behold.
How do you have so much free time to write this shit ?
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