Return Offers and Anxiety

Hello Everyone,


I haven't posted on this platform for a while. I just started my SA for 2022. My firm has a VERY high return offer rate, but I suffer from very extreme anxiety when it comes to my career.


I can do the work just fine, and I have been talking to people alot. Coffee chats and such, and I think everyone seems to be alright with me being there. I guess my worry is that everyone is just being nice but in reality they dislike me. The 3 deals I am staffed on are slow right now, but I am just waiting for the chance to prove myself. I'm terrified that I won't get the return offer, and I feel pretty useless right now honestly. I've been having the idea of shooting for other banks and investment firms as a hedge, though I really want to stay with the firm I'm at right now. Like I REALLY like the projects I'm on and its super fascinating. 


I've been dealing with a lot of losses lately, with a family member with a terminal illness, a shitty finals season, rejected from a dream society that I was gunning for at my nontarget. All I want is a win, and I am worried that I am just going to keep getting shit out of luck regardless of the effort I put in. Banking is so relationship based, and I'm worried that if one analyst dislikes me then I am going to be absolutely fucked.


Can I get some advice? Anyone get a return offer when they thought they fucked up?

 

The last part of your post is what compelled me to reply. I am very sorry to hear about the sick family member and the dream society rejection. However - having an internship in investment banking from a non-target is a huge win (I broke in from FSU - I can relate). Do NOT forget that.

Work anxiety is a real thing, and it is ok to be nervous about getting a return offer - however, constantly worrying about it will cloud your mind and only make it more difficult. Just continue to work hard when you get the opportunity, show up with a good attitude, be coachable/willing to learn, and you will get a return offer.  If deals are slow and there simply isn't a lot to be done on them right now, the analysts / associates know that and will not discount you for it.

Best of luck!

 
Most Helpful

Stay strong, you've made it this far. Keep your head down and try to force yourself to think optimistically, or at least not pessimistically. Even if you dont get a return offer, you will persevere so dont think of this as your one shot. I didnt get a return offer, one of my good friends didnt get a return offer. We both landed on our feet with better jobs than we ever couldve expected. He is still in banking doing quite well and I left to do something I enjoy more. I know this seems like a make or break moment but it is only because you are young and just starting out your career. I struggled a lot with career anxiety and can relate. As you progress during your career you will get better at handling it. 

If there is one piece of advice I can give, it's be yourself. If you work hard and do your best and are your true authentic self and you still dont get a return offer, you learned that ONE BANK isnt the right place for you. That does not mean by any means that banking as a whole isnt right for you. My friend didnt get a return offer because the bank wasnt the right fit for him, it happens. 

Keep your head up and keep doing your best, and everything will work itself out - coming from someone who failed at least once at just about everything they have ever tried 

 

Relax. They probably don't care about whatever part of the deal you are working on now, but they don't want to spend 2 years with someone who is neurotic.

Think about it this way, what is the worst thing that could possibly happen if you don't get a return offer... you suck it up and move on. Your life doesn't end just because you didn't get a return offer. Just calm down and know that they hired you for a reason. 

 

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