Joined a BB as an IB analyst about 7-8 months ago, and my anxiety has severely skyrocketed since then.
I now face heavy anxiety anytime I hear my email notification go off and I dread the sight of getting put on another project. My heart races every morning when I wake up at the prospect of getting yelled at / doing something wrong / having to pull an all-nighter.
Is / was anyone else in the same boat? Any advice? Any guidance would help.
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Damn dude. It's almost as if I wrote this lol. I have been struggling with the same. It's getting better though. I'd be very down to connect if you're open to that.
Absolutely. Feel free to DM me.
B/c of IB, i now routinely take anxiety meds before bed. And sometimes again during the day depending on whats going on. Ive also found that ive generalized the anxiety in my life to everyday situations, like being late to a dinner or responding to the family group chat. I think the minor parallels cause the same reaction as if it’s work b/c after 1.5+ years of getting slaughtered as an analyst, it’s like i can’t ever separate my life from work or vice versa
I’m sorry to hear that and I hope you can find peace. I’ve also noticed my “banking mentality” (a very unhealthy one) has leaked onto other aspects of my life. Like you said, it makes it hard to find any peace at all.
Are you in a culturally harsh group? Maybe you can try to lateral or transfer groups.
Apart from that I would recommend looking into Stoicism and applying stoic ways of thinking to your day-to-day life. Most people don’t enjoy inflicting mental pain on others; they just might be even more stressed than you are. Realizing this at least helps you humanize and empathize with the people that are making you feel anxious/stressed.
I would also recommend eating as healthy as you can and exercising as much as possible. If none if this solves your problem I would maybe consult a mental health professional.
Betterhelp was super helpful to me in managing the anxiety
What is it?
App that connects you with therapists. Super non-intrusive and very flexible with scheduling. Can be done on zoom, via text or phone call. I got matched with a very helpful one that was results oriented and has given me great advice and a solid outlet.
It's like a mental massage to work out all the bullshit.
Online mental health counseling service
That makes all of us. Nth to do but suck it up.
This is so myopic, come on now
fuck i feel like i wrote this post.. not sure if worth it to stick to 2 yr mark - tempted to exit after 1 yr mark
Had similar anxiety issues when I started out and two things that some fellow analysts / associates taught me which really helped are:
1. Focus just on the tasks currently at hand, don't overthink into the medium term about how much work a project is going be, will there be all nighters, fire drills, unreasonable requests, etc. Just focus on what you need to do at the moment
2. Just try to do the best you can and don't worry about factors you can't control. Hypothetically speaking, even if somehow you tried your best, underperformed and got laid off, you can easily find another job. Don't take the job so seriously, probably 95% of analysts and associates will be exiting in 2-3 years and once you leave, you will realize that all the anxiety and stress during IB was meaningless
Really strong advice here. This is it.
Staying present and not looking too far into the future. This is easier said then done, and I definitely wasn't able to take my own advice, but I think it's critically important for junior banker sanity.
I'd destroy myself mentally when we got a new deal signed up because I'd be thinking about all the work that needs to get done. On week 1, when I'd be putting together the WGL, KYC checks, and setting up deal team distributions I'd be dreading the CIP iterations, buyer outreach, dataroom, DD, deal docs, etc. Obviously those things are all coming down the line, but it serves no practical purpose to dwell on future work to the extent that you're depressing yourself. It is just too overwhelming.
The best people I worked with were always (seemingly) able to stay present and not get caught up with future obligations. Focusing on daily and maybe weekly tasks/milestones is extremely important.
Also first yr analyst here, had anxiety for a while. But I just stopped giving such a big fuck about all the work and now just try my best to finish my tasks the best I can.
Tbh banks are understaffed and they won't fire us analysts anyways so that's how I saw it. I know "not giving a fuck" is easier said than done but hope this helps
..
My one worry with this is that they will reduce my bonus
$5-10k in your bonus is not worth a severe decline in your mental health.
Was in the same boat - after 8 months when I was feeling more confident in my abilities and was familiar with how things are run, it did get better. But it never truly went away and I realized that I couldn't live that anxiety so I ended up leaving after the first year. I think it's all about a person's personality - I am a planner and control freak by nature, and the pressure / ambiguity with little to no guidance was so different from how I had operated growing up that I realized this kind of environment wasn't for me. Maybe some people on this forum would call me a soft pussy, but I'd rather be a soft pussy and wake up every day feeling thankful for life and all it brings, rather than staring at a computer screen at 5am wishing I had picked a different career.
I quit after 6 months due to the mental health toll and exited into a really quality role at a VC. PM me if I can help offer a perspective.
Thank you for this. I just sent you a PM.
Well known VC? How is your comp and WLB?
Well known by those in the spaces we cover.
Comp: 100% EB salary + 50% bonus
WLB: average 50 hours per week
You’re the most junior and worst-paid member of your team. I know this is easier said than done, but you’ve got to stop caring as much. Ultimately it’s all someone else’s problem
One of the most important replies here...it should be pinned somewhere for all these analysts coming on here...
Recommend seeing a therapist and / or psychiatrist. I made it through 3+ years of banking totally fine, then when I was in PE after we got a new group head anxiety went through the roof.
Thanks for sharing this -- I'm currently undergoing a similar situation. Got through my 2 year BB stint (relatively) fine but now my PE shop is more stressful and still dealing with a lot of anxiety as now the added stress is compounding. How did you deal with this?
I'm thinking about leaving my firm once I hit the year mark, but want to get a handle on the anxiety issue before making a decision so I don't burnout of my next gig as well. For added context, I started seeing a therapist about a month ago.
I will say that just like in banking, the 1 year mark in PE is kind of this arbitrary inflection point as well where you're more used to the deal cycle, processes, etc., and as you get a new class of associates under you. See if you can take some time off as well - nothing crazy, but at least a full week to decompress. I know everyone says that and it doesn't ever solve the problem completely, but hopefully provides a little boost.
Breathe brother - 10 years from now you will be slapping yourself in the face for why you were so stressed out over something trivial. You will be fine.
Dont worry, you'd stop giving a fuck after a while.
Internal message read and not reply straight away.
Jump on Zoom a few mins late.
Create fake items on outlook calendar so your email flags busy.
This is also great advice. The fake meetings and rocking up late to meetings, even by a few minutes can be a helpful reprieve.
Same - working in IB for the past 7 months has ramped up my anxiety and made my insomnia worse. Before I had trouble falling asleep maybe a few times per year - now it's at least once a week.
Some things I've found that help with managing stress: breathing exercises, getting up and stretching / moving around after sitting down for long periods of time, drinking tea, writing down my thoughts. On the last point, I usually vent about what's bothering me and try to end on a more positive note, writing about what I'm grateful for and how I'm going to do better going forward.
10 minute meditation every day can help a lot. Highly recommended.
Start taking ashwaganda
First few months are honestly a brutal adjustment. As you get more comfortable / better at the job things improve. Don’t give up but also ask if this job / high finance is right for you. If not, bounce ship and pivot. You will have more options than you think.
You have to care less. You really can't invest too much in the work. If you hate yourself when you make a small mistake or get stressed that you will make a mistake, you are caring too much about the work. Everyone makes mistakes and it takes a certain mental toughness to make it through the ranks in banking. Don't get emotionally attached to doing a perfect job. Do the work quickly and as correctly as possible and move it out the door - send it along. That's the name of the game.
This is what’s fundamentally wrong this industry.
Success is predicated on making mistakes, learning from them, and not making those mistakes anymore. What differentiates the best from the worst are how quickly they make mistakes and whether or not they learn from them.
It’s a cliche at this point but Michael Jordan missed ~9,000 shots and lost over 300 games.
Turn the email notifications off!!! Seriously
If they need you that minute they'll call you. Otherwise, checking your email every 15 minutes eliminates the jump scare of notifications
It's been about ten years since I was an analyst - I had a work Blackberry back then that would blink red when emails came in, and TBH small blinking notification lights still raise my blood pressure. There's one in my car, IDK what it's for but I've been considering covering it up with a piece of tape.
If you had to go back in time or were in our shoes today, would you have still done it? See that your tag is corp fin
Not going to say I regret it per se, as my life is pretty good and I'm happy and financially secure, but I do sometimes wonder if I should have done something a bit more "tangible". Like my friend is an OBGYN and delivered some babies today... I spent half the day tying out numbers in excel and the other half on a stream of zooms. Definitely some grass is greener here as I've expressed this to him and his response was basically "wanna trade lives? I have six figures in student loans".
IB certainly opens doors - sometimes I just wonder if those doors are the ones I wanted.
I remember this. I'd stare at the phone and nervously wait to see if a red light appeared. If it did I'd get the shot of anxiety and I'd hold my breath as I checked. Sometimes it would just be BS internal group or firm wide email, and I breathe a sigh of relief
Bruh STORY OF MY LIFE. Started 8 months ago at large MM and finna leave when my 1yr hits. This shit just ain’t worth it imo and there’s an abundance of better ways to make money these days without all the artificial / excessive stress, heart palpitations, etc. As if this job didn’t shave enough years off my lifespan already. Also it’s crazy to see the amount of opportunities (HF, PE, consulting, investment management, etc) available these days for IB analysts after just one year of experience 👀
OP and all these comments are speaking right to me lmao. Not sure how people do this constantly on and stressed lifestyle longer term. Thinking of leaving at the one year mark too and seeing all these recruiter emails for basically everything is giving me hope.
I'd caution that HF / PE roles are just as stressful if not more stressful than IB. Make sure to do your diligence on what you really want versus just hoping it'll be better.
A lot of people have commented to start caring less about the job, which is definitely an important factor. Also adding in my two cents below that really helped me
I think we may need to quit. Literally had an anxiety attack today for the same reasons you mention.
I don't know if I can tough it out until the bonus anymore. This last month has been the worst of my life.
Would love to hear any tips as well
hey, wonder how youre coping ? im anxiety prone so I'm worried about coping when i actually start..
Feels so good to hear from others and realizing I’m not the only one. I even quit before my stub which is due to be paid 6 months into the job.
To me, it was just not worth it.
where did u go after that? was it hard to find a second job while getting thrown so much work?
I am sorry to hear that.
As much as it sucks, the best advice I can give is to try and mentally reframe the situation. You’ve gotta view it as a challenge that’s worth overcoming.
Others have offered some practical advice but really the best thing you can do is detach from the moment whenever you feel anxiety. As hard as it is, you CAN reframe the situation and turn the anxiety / stress into excitement / energy.
Also, highly recommend cold showers. The adrenaline release and instant fight or flight response is the same you feel in the job which is classified as anxiety / stress. If you can grow comfortable with how that PHYSICALLY feels, you can better recognize how to respond and remain in control when it hits.
Also a first year at a BB and felt the same way back in November / December. Helps a lot to zoom out and realize that at the end of the day, this job doesn’t REALLY matter if you only plan on staying for a year max.
I felt this so strongly. A lot of people are saying “just don’t care as much” but of course that’s much easier said than done especially when it comes to anxiety where it’s so hard to think rationally. With work from home I would wake up anxious and go to sleep anxious and a little angry about the next day and having to repeat the process again. The anxiety for me sometimes was and still is paralyzing. For example, sometimes I get to a good stoping point and it will be 3am, but rather then just getting up and going to bed, I can’t move from my desk out of fear that I’m not doing enough, or messed something up or that I’m missing something — so I end up staying at my desk doing useless unproductive tasks for the next hour or two. Sometimes I literally have to get high to be relaxed enough to stand up. Anytime my work phone pings my heart jumps, I have a fear/anxiety of checking emails and notifications. For a period of time I didn’t even want to leave my apartment for coffee because I was worried about missing something and not responding fast enough so I ended up doing Uber Eats for everything. What has helped me is communicating with my team “Hey I need this time for me or else I can’t sustainably keep producing” and holding on strong to that boundary. So now I have certain blocks on my calendar for the gym and everyone knows, I’m at the gym that that time and another block to just cool down. I still have my struggles but that has helped me a lot.
Bro back in college I used to get high like a few times a year, until recently Now I found that I actually work better while high because it gets rid of the anxiety and pure hatred for the job that I have while I'm working sober.
Bump
For me it was email from one person, the CEO. Super stressful every time I see the notifications. Even when she was writing to say, good job done.
same here. i am terrified to open emails.
Hot Take: If what you're doing for 10-16 hours of your day (almost every day) gives you anxiety/depression, do something else. There are plenty of ways to make good money, and you only get one life, so it might be worth trying out an alternative. Seriously, IB is not the be-all end-all.
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