Wall Street on Wall Street 2

Southampton, New York: A gathering of Titans was brewing; names like Kravis, Schwarzman, Black, and Giuliani were on the guest list. Was it a Bilderberg meeting? No. Perhaps another “idea” dinner? Wrong again. Where they watching Shia LaBeouf pull a Costanza on the big screen? Bingo.

A special screening of Wall Street: Money never sleeps was given for the masters of the universe and among the attendees were Henry Kravis, Steve Schwarzman, Wilbur Ross, Leon Black, Pete Peterson, David Ganek, Steve Mnuchin, Aby Rosen, Tom Wolfe, Ted Forstmann, Rudy Giuliani, Alfred Taubman, and Jeffrey Epstein- who ironically was just released from his 1 year house arrest stint.

The screening was followed by a dinner party and some guests were kind enough to give out their reviews. No surprise, it was mostly praise for Michael Douglas; Wilbur Ross was quoted saying "He would captivate any audience" and Peter Smith, a former Lazard partner said “I thought Michael Douglas did a terrific job.”

Douglas fanboyism aside, they didn’t hold back on critiquing the story. "It was a weak storyline…” said Smith. “I'd rather see real combat, Wall Street style. They got a lot of things right, though, like the vindictiveness of the Treasury and the Fed." Ross added that compared to the original, which “had a lot more sex and violence. This one was more about family than finance." and when a reporter hinted that it was intended for a younger, non R-rated demographic, he snapped "You think younger people don't have sex?"

So anyway what have we got here? A family movie? For a younger audience? Sounds like Gordon Gekko got licensed to the Hallmark channel. He probably got himself a dog too. As expected Hollywood came out with another sequel that doesn’t do justice to the original, and probably ruined an icon of generations.

What about Shia?

I’m leaving that to you.