Another Enraged Sorority Email Leaked: "No Sex on the Red Couch!"

I guess the new thing is for these emails to leak on TFM. But they're great.

Subject: NO NO NO NO NO NO sex in common areas

LADIES (and someone in here is not acting like one)…..

NO SEX ON THE RED COUCH.

NO SEX IN THE KITCHEN (this particularly is upsetting as its supposed to be clean bc we prepare food).

NO SEX ANYWHERE In the common areas. NONE NONE NONE.

i cant believe i have to write this. but the condom wrapper in the kitchen is the LAST STRAW. im really pissed off. i dont want to eat from an area with your disgusting butt/vag/friends ween germs nor do i want to sit on them. so cut it out. we have beds for a reason and if you really have an aversion to sex in your bed (which is honestly really the only comfy option i enjoy of the three) then have sex in someone else’s COMMON area. its called common for a reason. its PUBLIC. so cut it out. if you dont have the balls to sexile the roommate, dont let someone else’s on the sofa or in OUR kitchen.

im so angry right now and im not sorry this is mean because its NOT okay. you have disrespected everyone and i dont appreciate it. ITS GROSSSSSSSS and UNSANITARY. i want to lysol the entire house now. i can understand it happening when youre really drunk but its not just that. keep in mind that i live on the first floor. and that sound carries. that goes not only for the house sex bandits, but for noise bandits as well.

ps to the kitchen offender: take the fucking condom wrapper out of the pot under the stove. thats not a trash can. its cookware.

Read more at http://totalfratmove.com/another-enraged-sorority-email-leaked-no-sex-o…

8 Comments
 

Somebody wanted attention

"You stop being an asshole when it sucks to be you." -IlliniProgrammer "Your grammar made me wish I'd been aborted." -happypantsmcgee
 

My favorite places:

1) Bed- comfort outweighs all 2) Floor/kitchen table- because it just had to happen 3) Couch- a little of both 4) Shower- feels great, but I almost always slip at some point. Can be painful. 5) Anywhere else in the house 1,000,000,000,000) Beach- sand blows

"You stop being an asshole when it sucks to be you." -IlliniProgrammer "Your grammar made me wish I'd been aborted." -happypantsmcgee
 
D M

My favorite places:

1) Bed- comfort outweighs all
2) Floor/kitchen table- because it just had to happen
3) Couch- a little of both
4) Shower- feels great, but I almost always slip at some point. Can be painful.
5) Anywhere else in the house
1,000,000,000,000) Beach- sand blows

Dude, floor needs to be 999,999,999,999). You're either getting rug burn or laying on hard wood or tile.

Also, these sorority girls are stupid. The one thing you don't do is send insane shit over the list-serve. All this does is open you up to troubles with alumni and lawsuits.

 

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