Anyone feel like they've become too superficial?

I've had a little bit of a realization lately that most of the time I spend in my mind outside of work is thinking about where to go next in my career, going to the gym to look better around girls, what clothes I'm wearing or thinking about buying next, or comparing myself to others. It's getting me 'ahead' in life, but I feel like I'm losing the feeling and emotion that makes life enjoyable. Not really sure how to cope. I am a little religious and praying at times helps, and I make time to go out in nature or read sometimes which also helps but those are just little blips of exception outside of the rule. It's just been years of this at this point.

22 Comments
 

How do you mean? I feel like I'm pretty confident in who I am as a person luckily so self comparison to others doesn't really bother me, which perhaps is something I've noticed others get caught up in a lot.

 

These things are fairly common for people to think through and it doesn’t make you that superficial, nor should it make you less happy that you value these 

 

Same feeling, think its a combination of ageing and having comfortable money to spend on this stuff. I grew up strictly middle class but now in PE and have started caring about jewellery, bags, clothes, do I look good etc. Think this profession generally rewards you for maintaing appearances, but I overall hate the trend as it feels like I'm becoming a slave to these superficial things and losing some sort of freedom of living a simple life. Think reading, nature, hobbies, and focusing on how to become better at the job have generally helped

Array
 

It's interesting for me, because my family was well off, but my parents still never really indulged themselves, because they were self made. Now I buy watches, expensive sweaters, etc. Shift of values, but it's part of being born and raised in the States I think.

 

That is true. I notice when travelling to parts of Europe and Asia, people focus more on their families and happiness. A lot of American life seems to center around 'image' in society. I enjoy the chase, but I don't know if it's the most fulfilling way to really live. 

 
coolio9966

That is true. I notice when travelling to parts of Europe and Asia, people focus more on their families and happiness. A lot of American life seems to center around 'image' in society. I enjoy the chase, but I don't know if it's the most fulfilling way to really live. 

This is so false Asian society is obsessed with image. And "high society" in Europe is Uber image obsessed too - they're far flashier than in the us where random rich midwestern people drive simple cars and lead simple lives. Go visit French alps or riviera etc 

 

Nope. Image and status is everything when you work in high paying jobs. Hard truth is that if you're an uncompetitive person, you'll get uncompetitive outcomes. There's so many losers in this world that having anything and enjoying the fruits of your own labor will make you feel guilty and "superficial" if you don't know any better. All successful people have haters. 

 

One can have superficial seeming thoughts without necessarily being a superficial person. If such things are all you think about, then you may be. Wouldn’t say this should make you emotionally numb however 

 

I was but then realized nobody really gives a shit about me so I just started living a simpler life. 

The important thing is never to let oneself be guided by the opinion of one's contemporaries; to continue steadfastly on one's way without letting oneself be either defeated by failure or diverted by applause.
 

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