Biggest banking lie you were told
What is the biggest banking/finance lie you were told that ended up being a lie.
I start with, "Apply early we hire on a rolling basis."
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How is apply early not good advice?
It’s good but they do not hire on a rolling basis…
You apply in August and they will get back to you god knows when
that's true ngl
Ain’t true they hire on a rolling basis, at least in Europe.
That's literally where it's the most true
Only the elite go into banking, and then I discovered people like OP from state schools get into banking.
Least bad smoke frog post
I imagine that Smoke Frog looks like this.
And he is writing here while telling the analysts “pls fix”
“Internships aren’t required for IB, no need to apply for FT positions until after Thanksgiving senior year.”
- My crappy undergrad career center who knew nothing.
I did have fun studying abroad two summers in a row though. It all worked out in the end.
That's so true. They say no need to apply for freshmen or sophomore internships! I suggest you get career advice from seniors themselves who got into IB. There's a reason why the career center people are where they are and not on Wall Street.
How did you overcome this??
The work bankers do is important. Pretty much found that that is a lie on day one.
Bankers just keep the machine running and get paid if they don't break it. If they do break it, they get paid anyway....
"Everything's meticulously handled by the best and brightest"
That's crap, we keep the place running with duct-tape and string. We're a top-10 AM firm, and I have so many stories.
You pass by Office Depot every morning to buy a 3 pack of tape for the day, just in case…
“It’s a two year program” lmao
“Hard work will be rewarded.”
“Bonuses are performance based.”
Hard work is rewarded with more hard work
The better your historic performance is, the more they grab you by the balls with the bonus
Thought id finally get some pussy. Just wait till I get MF PE. It’ll be non stop poon parade once that happens, that’s for sure.
It’s like gym, once you hit your prime, the only ones interested are other guys
The pick up line “I work at Goldman” never fails said nobody
lol I believed this lie in college but thank god figured it out pretty fast. Still fun to travel to NYC to visit my friends still in finance, go out to bars, and continue to see that 90%+ of bankers who talk a big game are just well compensated nerds trying to make up for not being cool in high school. For every Chet who was captain of the rowing team at Yale, there are 9 dorks who excel & ppt are their personalities
If you want to get laid go become a bartender.
"But those girls are trash! I want classy girls" you may reply
Then go become a ski instructor. You will sleep with far more athletic private school raised women than you will in banking
I'd also add 'prestige' in general to this. The pool of people who care about what firm you work for or your title, let alone find it impressive to hold you in high esteem, is very very small (less than 10% of the US population). If you are trying to impress strangers at a cocktail party or instill envy to cover your insecurity, then you will get more mileage saying you are a pilot, in the cost guard, or own a bagel shop than finance.
Do it for the money, and because you enjoy it. Do not choose any career for the approval of others (men, women, parents, etc.)
“We’re a chill group”
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