Shy guys when did you became confident?

I'm a pretty shy guy, and i am already 24, trying to break in IB, how will i survive if i ever get in? i mean i am at the level of shyness where i stutter when i speak with more than 3 people around me.

did anyone go from super shy to confident? if so, how long did it take you? any other advice? 

Thanks.

30 Comments
 

Nothing wrong with being shy. I’m actually really attracted to shy girls. I think the same goes for shy people - you seem more genuine. The one thing though is that when you do talk, you should be confident in what you have to say. Maybe work on that. 
 

Here’s a secret I’ll share - 

Every morning on my run, I look up and pretend to have conversations with people. Mostly girls. I’m working on maintaining eye contact. Just doing this visualization everyday has really helped me be comfortable maintaining eye contact with girls. Maybe you can do something similar with visualizing being ok talking with people. 

 

Sophomore year of HS

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 

Isaiah_53_5 💎🙌💎🙌💎

Sophomore year of HS

Isaiah this thread is about you, not how old your gf is 

Get your sick pedo mind off of here.

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 

Isaiah_53_5 💎🙌💎🙌💎

Sophomore year of HS

Isaiah this thread is about you, not how old your gf is 

Your mind went there not mine - you have issues. You should get help. You’re disgusting.

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 

Isaiah_53_5 💎🙌💎🙌💎

Sophomore year of HS

Isaiah this thread is about you, not how old your gf is 

I’ve never said anything about doing illegal shit so shut the up with your defamation. 

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 

I’m reporting you.

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 

Anonymous Monkey

I'm a pretty shy guy, and i am already 24, trying to break in IB, how will i survive if i ever get in? i mean i am at the level of shyness where i stutter when i speak with more than 3 people around me.

did anyone go from super shy to confident? if so, how long did it take you? any other advice? 

Thanks.

As you get older you just start being more and more confident. In some case you actually forget you used to be shy. Strange but true in my case.

SafariJoe, wins again!
 

Anonymous Monkey

I hope that'll be the same for me, I'll do my best to end up with this result 

Just look at this as when you first started to drive, you start slow build your confidence and now you rarely think about that first time. Secondly. Surround yourself around confident people, watch YouTube videos to improve etc.

SafariJoe, wins again!
 

Hey I’m not sure if there is anything wrong with being shy but it may just be me. I think shyness may be an admirable trait. Also stuttering I don’t see as an issue necessarily. If you prefer not to stutter hopefully there is a way to remove that from you somehow if you want. I’m not sure how shyness and IBD blend but I spent almost 3 years in banking/IBD and I think I may have tried to / thought of then as shyness being a good trait. But then again, maybe that’s why I’m not in IBD right now. Idk. I thought this may help you and I hope it does. Best wishes and good luck :)

 

I had pretty bad social anxiety (still do). I really just put myself out of my comfort zone and in front of unfamiliar faces, joining clubs in university, public speaking classes, new sports, alcohol, saying hi to the first person i saw, ect ect. Eventually you realize everyone is just a person going through the same thing and you stop giving a fuck about what other people think. Once you stop giving a fuck that's when you truly become confident. I got out of my shyness about junior year in Uni

 

Once I started my first real job trading. Your shyness goes away real fast when you have someone else breathing down your neck to produce a PnL so getting on the phone and making things happen over time kinda of eliminates the fear and gives you a good excuse not to be shy. When you are put in a position like that for hours every day it eventually just carries into life outside of work as well.

 

First year uni. No one from my HS went to the same uni as me, I decided to introduce myself / sit next to someone new in every lecture / tutorial for the first 2 months. Forced me to make new mates and build social confidence. Can do the same in a new job (which I’ve also done)

 

I used to be shy especially when meeting new people. Over time it went away. I think something that helped was learning to communicate with new people better by simply asking questions. Let them lead the conversation and ask clarifying questions. (People love to talk about themselves). The book “How to win friends and influence” was a great read and helped with small talk. Also staying up to date on current news always helps, especially when you’re in the office. 

 

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