Real Estate

You coaxed me into writing my longest post ever.

I saw both of your posts on WSO and I think you need to chill out, because “you have the rest of your life ahead of you.”  You probably came to this site and with eyes wide open soaked up the negativity, prestige-envy, yet seemingly useful advice that you only wished you did “yesterday” and years ago.  

When I tell people who I’m “mentoring” about WSO, I warn them not to compare themselves or take things too literally.
 

A little story about me and what I think you are missing:

I majored in Sociology in undergrad.  I loved the subject and that combined with my more technical major (accounting, which I attended in evening classes as a Masters of Accounting student), it laid a good foundation for me for business.

Since you bring up your high school accolades (your AP classes), I can tell you I took no APs.  I did attend the top private high school for academics in my state so it wasn’t because I was disadvantaged.  
 

Around my Spring Semester of Sophomore year, I was already planning to switch majors from Biology to Sociology.  And I was wondering what I wanted to do with my social science education - something to do with law or working for the FBI was something in the cards.  At my dad’s urging, I also took the AFQT with the Army (standardized test).  My freshman Fall semester, I got a D in calculus (I wasn’t ever that great in math beyond algebra 2, but it didn’t help my high school buds from college on the mainland showed up at my dorm the night before the final exam and I ended up smoking out with them at the beach while sitting on my Calculus text book).  Since I didn’t like killing animals, a lab researcher was not in the cards below doctor/dentist.  Seemed like I didn’t like the remaining options I had left.

So my Sophomore year Spring semester, was a pivotal point.  The Univ of Hawaii had a foreign language requirement so I was taking Conversational Japanese.  Everyone had to pair  up for language partner to practice in class and I ended up with that group of three because there was an odd number of students - me, an international student from China or Taiwan, and an older Asian man who looked like in his 50’s.  That was our group for the semester.  Towards the end of the semester, we started talking what my plans were, what my major was.  I said switching majors to sociology.  Not sure what I’ll do after.  I enjoyed the subject. Maybe law?  Then, I asked him, “Ben, what do you do?” And he said “I’m a partner of a law firm and I have 13 attorneys under me.”  I thought “holy s***, I was talking to this guy all semester and I thought he was some old guy taking classes.”  So, lightning strikes my head (so funny how these pivotal thoughts happen that changed my life).  A bit too bold usually for me, I straight up asked him if he had any summer jobs.  He said yes, they were moving offices and needed to pack up documents.  So I would intern for them that summer.  My first job in real estate.
 

Ben, who had a civil engineering degree and a law degree (prominent land use attorney) would say get a technical background.  It helps.  STEM, engineering, accounting. I always remembered and baked that into my plans.  So, I will try to graduate UG in four years, and then maybe go to grad school - law or something else.  That something else would be getting a Masters of Accounting (I’ll later get a MBA - my wife says she’ll divorce if I get another degree, haha).

This is when I flipped the switch and became not just a student/person along for the ride, but a shaper of my environment. I really enjoyed social sciences after taking classes that I didn’t really enjoy earlier.  I had friends at the UG business school - they had a great path to work laid out for them - Big Four recruiting, student clubs, scholarships from like Enterprise Rental Car - stuff I saw that was totally absent on this side of campus (Social sciences and most of the arts and sciences umbrella).  And so, I started my first venture, creating a Sociology Club to help social science majors such as yourself just recently graduated with career planning.  Never been done before.  
 

I could go on and on, but for the first time in my life I stepped into the creative/entrepreneur world and it’s helped me in corporate and beyond.  I created this survey and analyzed it with SPSS of all the social science majors and lo and behold career planning became more important in their senior year.  Not rocket science right.  So start earlier.  In the process I grew from being a faceless student to a student with a cause and a reason beyond myself to do things bigger than myself. To me, that was the biggest thing I got out of college (and why I love UH), and it’s never too late to shape your mind that way.  
 

Ok, for you.  Fast forward, I’m sitting in the Dean of Accounting’s office just prior to starting my MAcc.  I told Dr Hamid, I want to graduate and sit for the CPA as soon as I could - I want to finish in 12 months, no later than 18.  What Hamid told me, also changed my life: “Odog, what’s the big rush, you have the rest of your life ahead of you.  Do it right and get the most out of the program.”  I quit my restaurant job and started working as an accountant in downtown Honolulu and took classes at night for two years. I did really well, and managed to get recruited for jobs on the Mainland.

From reading your posts, short of sounding like a panic attack in words, to me you have emerged from your cocoon and now suddenly comparing yourself - and getting down on yourself.  You’re smart.  But I want you to examine what is it that you’ve done for other people that got you excited.  All I’m reading is money problems and that your career is over.  It’s not over.  But instead of panic and spaz, think of the next 3 years to remake yourself into what you want to be.  Don’t think in 6 month increments, you won’t accomplish much of meaning. 
 

1) find what motivates you beyond money - my daughter’s fortune cookie from Panda Express said “in finding happiness for others, you’ll likely find it for yourself”

2) make a plan with the thought about achievement and enjoyment.  I remember planning how I’d become the Athletic Director for UH in 20 years.  While plans change, never lose sight of the Longview.  Short view leads to worst outcomes (divorce, business break ups, litigation, etc).  Enjoy the ride.

3) never stop believing in yourself.  One thing my dad did really well was made me take accountability for my failures but made me think  about how to better external factors and getting them right next time.  He nagged the s*** out of me, so I also developed a strong ability to concentrate and work in chaotic environments (airports, back seat in a car, night clubs, etc).  So I always thought I had potential. You’ll need that when your development is in progress.  Stop comparing yourself.

4) the mountain (of problems) can be chipped away bit by bit.  Don’t panic by looking at the whole mountain as some immovable force.

5) develop a system for yourself.  Learn about your strengths and weaknesses.  Create a system.  For me, my social science background helped me synthesize large amounts of info and write better than I thought my UG business friends had to do (with ChatGPT, oh boy, it’s going to get worse).  I felt I was more open to taking positions on trends.  What is social science anyways but the study of people and large groups of people (sociology) over time.  As business people, leaders, it is helpful in having a sense for that. After all you want large groups of people buying your stuff.  Think of your soc degree like that. Now, what’s next?  

6) find an area to focus in.  If you focus on something, eventually you’ll become an expert and have a network.  The sooner you start the better.  Say you start now, in your early 20’s.  In 10 years, say when you’re 35 years old, you’ll be an expert.  Because you focused and you did other things to boost your credibility (I’ve been on a nonprofit Board for 12 years in my field) since my 20’s.
 

7) find a community.  Now more than ever, you can find a community to immerse yourself in your new focus (or focuses).  Industry groups to MBA student lead conferences.  Just show up, meet people. Write down notes.  Follow up.  

The key starts with you and your mindset.  You’ve come to the Real Estate board, so you are exploring #6 and #7, so those are good first steps.