Cold E-mail Question

I am writing a cold email to a firm (It's a networking contact somewhat) for a internship, and I am having trouble phrasing the closing line.

"I understand you're a busy man, but I would like to meet with you to discuss the possibilities of interning for you this fall. Let me know when I would be able to talk to you more about this."

The quotations is what I have in the draft right now. Is it alright? Or does anyone have any recommendations for changes?

Should I include the option of talking on the phone?

 

"I understand you're a busy man, but I would like to meet with you to discuss the possibilities of interning for you this fall. Let me know when I would be able to talk to you more about this."

I realize you are busy but would like the opportunity to meet with you to discuss the possibility of an internship this coming fall. I look forward to hearing from you soon.

----Ehh not the greatest rephrasing but you could probably use some of it

 

Inventore reprehenderit nesciunt ratione est dolore eligendi sit. Dolores quia at facilis quia. Fuga aut accusamus at occaecati sint atque.

Molestias debitis saepe non amet dolor. Vero illum ut nihil placeat ratione ut cupiditate. Qui beatae a est aspernatur esse. Non iste perferendis sed iste sit illum officia iste.

Tempore aut labore voluptatem voluptate non iusto rerum consequatur. Enim aut perspiciatis nesciunt ut quia ab. Numquam ut ut natus nihil qui eveniet. Fuga sed ipsa dolor beatae vel modi voluptatum. Pariatur iste ullam autem quis quia.

Career Advancement Opportunities

March 2024 Investment Banking

  • Jefferies & Company 02 99.4%
  • Goldman Sachs 19 98.8%
  • Harris Williams & Co. (++) 98.3%
  • Lazard Freres 02 97.7%
  • JPMorgan Chase 03 97.1%

Overall Employee Satisfaction

March 2024 Investment Banking

  • Harris Williams & Co. 18 99.4%
  • JPMorgan Chase 10 98.8%
  • Lazard Freres 05 98.3%
  • Morgan Stanley 07 97.7%
  • William Blair 03 97.1%

Professional Growth Opportunities

March 2024 Investment Banking

  • Lazard Freres 01 99.4%
  • Jefferies & Company 02 98.8%
  • Goldman Sachs 17 98.3%
  • Moelis & Company 07 97.7%
  • JPMorgan Chase 05 97.1%

Total Avg Compensation

March 2024 Investment Banking

  • Director/MD (5) $648
  • Vice President (19) $385
  • Associates (86) $261
  • 3rd+ Year Analyst (13) $181
  • Intern/Summer Associate (33) $170
  • 2nd Year Analyst (66) $168
  • 1st Year Analyst (202) $159
  • Intern/Summer Analyst (144) $101
notes
16 IB Interviews Notes

“... there’s no excuse to not take advantage of the resources out there available to you. Best value for your $ are the...”

Leaderboard

1
redever's picture
redever
99.2
2
BankonBanking's picture
BankonBanking
99.0
3
Betsy Massar's picture
Betsy Massar
99.0
4
Secyh62's picture
Secyh62
99.0
5
GameTheory's picture
GameTheory
98.9
6
dosk17's picture
dosk17
98.9
7
DrApeman's picture
DrApeman
98.9
8
CompBanker's picture
CompBanker
98.9
9
kanon's picture
kanon
98.9
10
numi's picture
numi
98.8
success
From 10 rejections to 1 dream investment banking internship

“... I believe it was the single biggest reason why I ended up with an offer...”