Most prestigious way to enter a meeting room?

Funny

colon

Took a long time to decide which monkey shit category since all 4 apply.

i stand a bit closer so they can smell the musk from my colon.

That’s pretty fucking close

farting, loudly. Then proceed to shake everyone's hand as if nothing happened

Any of these 3 should serve as an attention grabber imo:

1) Guttural yelp resembling a raccoon or bobcat if you are looking for a more animalistic entrance. Also useful for courtship purposes if you want to bang a hot colleague 

2) WWE-style entrance. Set up bluetooth speakers in the meeting room beforehand, decide if you wish to go playlist route or just your favorite song, connect when the meeting is just about to begin and when you are in walking distance of the room. Ideally, you want your walk-in to jive with whatever music you are playing for rhythm & consistency purposes and for additional dramatic effect.

3) If all else fails, just Naruto-run into the meeting room. It might be divisive but it will resonate with people of high culture (anime watchers)

Best of luck!

At first people asked most prestigious cologne, I felt ok with that. Then people asked about food, I felt ok with that. And now way of entering. Alright... I will give 2 options, either don't enter at all, or come from window. Choose window as its exit options sound more interesting.

Like this:

Client steps up to the table. They're digging in, preparing to take their best cuts at it. They know exactly what pitch I'm going to throw at them--it's the only pitch I have! But they're scared shitless.

I sit them down one-two-three. They pay a turn-and-a-half over market, setting a new high water mark for comps. They never had a chance. Embarrassing, really.

I think most men would like to feel--if even once in their life--what it must have been like to be Mariano Rivera coming out of the bullpen on any given night. Bruh.

slam your dick on the desk, should make a sound comparable to dropping a 50 lb dumbell

have a bunch of unpaid interns bring you in like this 

bruh you need (i) to realize no one gives a shit (ii) professional help

http://gph.is/22D5JJF

Enter 20 minutes after the meeting has started. Be the last person to ask a question. Make sure the question is juiced up with all the buzzwords you can conjure. Bonus points if you are wearing round glasses and a windbreaker, and can take pauses and rub your chin while staring outside the window.

Also - leave the meeting before everyone else while exclaiming, "Sorry everyone. I have a strategic meeting with the board." Can be the school board. Or a literal whiteboard hanging in your office. Doesn't matter. 
 

#Bossman #Bosswoman #BossLGBTQ+

You've got some serious issues if ppl can smell one of your organs 

My boss used to pull some combination (often all) of these in manager meetings:

• enter 10 minutes after the meeting has begun

• apologize for being late - client call ran long - and announce you have a hard stop well before the scheduled end of the meeting, but you only need a few specific questions answered

• proceed to rattle off the questions you need answered (nobody was asking questions yet but hey, you said you have a hard stop)

• once your questions are answered, continuously interrupt the remaining presentation with random questions that were generally answered in the first 10 minutes when you weren't there

• leave before the presentation is over, usually after receiving a phone call, apologizing and saying "sorry, I have to take this."

Everyone loves that surprise musk smell

Honestly the fake call part is pretty helpful.

My go-to convo is

Now, John, you've gotta wear clothes

in proportion to your physique.

There are definite dos and don'ts,

good buddy,

of wearing a bold-striped shirt.

A bold-striped shirt

calls for solid-colored

or discreetly patterned suits and ties.

Yes, always tip the stylist 15%.

Listen, John, I've got to go.

T. Boone Pickens just walked in.

Just joking.

No, don't tip the owner of the salon.

Okay, John? Right.

Got it.

Just have someone play the same BGM while walking in

It looks like some of you are taking OP seriously for some reason... this is why people say bankers have no sense of humour.

Funnily enough though, OP does actually probe at a serious topic: What we would call "executive presence". There are lots of small things that you can do to project confidence. Not all of them can be taught, but some can.

Step Brothers style: "We're here to f**k sh*t up!

When I walk into a room my dick arrives 10 seconds ahead. (Pun intended?) That way I assert dominance and the CEO, MDs, and everyone else knows who the real BSD is. dafuq is this post? 

None.

The most important people don't have to be in the room- they dial in from wherever they currently are.

What’s up with everyone so worried about prestige???? We all put our pants on the same way.

I only walk in with the pyro and Kane's music

imitate tommy shelby

Toss a stun grenade into the meeting room. make sure you get hit markers. Slide cancel into the room. ADS fast. Eliminate everyone in the room. Finish off the VP who was able to buy a self-res. 

Russian Team Leader. Good Work. That is how you do it

Lmao

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