OFFICIAL prestige-caller 2018 prestige rankings

PrestigeCaller's picture
Rank: King Kong | 1,765

Most Prestigious Cities:

Gods of Prestige: New York, Hong Kong, London
Very Prestigious: Chicago, San Francisco, Singapore, Zurich, Frankfurt
Prestigious: Charlotte, Houston, Atlanta, Washington D.C., Boston
Meh: Los Angeles, Dallas, Miami, Minneapolis, Philadelphia
Fck Your Life: Baltimore, New Jersey (The whole fckin' state), Seattle, Kansas City, etc.

Most Prestigious Jobs:

Automatic HandJob: Hedge Fund Manager, Corp PE MegaFund Associate, Venture Capital Investor
Impress Your Girlfriend's Father: REPE Associate, Bulge Bracket Investment Banker, MBB Consultant, Quantitative Analyst, Bulge Bracket Sales & Trading
Worth a Hand-Job: REIT Associate, Wealth Manager, Boutique Investment Banker, Big 4 Consultant, F500 Corporate Finance, Investment Sales, Proprietary Trading
Even Your Own Mother's Not Impressed: Accountant, Operations, Back Office Tech Guy, Risk Staff, Brokerage

Most Prestigious Vacation Home Locations:

Primary WASP Market: Nantucket, Bridgehampton, Aspen, Maui
Limited Upper-Middle Class Riff-Raff: Martha's Vineyard, Easthampton, Palm Beach, Orange County, South Beach, Yosemite
Satisfactorily Gentrified: Vail/Keystone/Breckenridge, Charleston SC, Salt Lake City/Park City
What Are You, 16?: All MD/DE Beaches, Outer Banks, Smokey Mountains Cabins, Disney World,

Most Prestigious Universities

Divine Prestige: UVA
Peak Mortal Achievement: Ivy Leagues, MIT, Chicago, Williams
Commendable Prestige: Duke, UNC, Notre Dame, USC, Berkeley, Georgetown, Carnegie Mellon
Kinda Neat: Wake Forest, Vanderbilt, NYU, Michigan
Hope You Enjoyed High School, Failure: Georgia Tech, SEC Schools (Minus Vandy), Indiana, Wisconsin, Pretty Much All Public Schools Outside of the Top 10

Most Prestigious Methods of Transportation

Tired of Winning: Helicopter, Private Jet, Tesla
Incredibly Affluent: Sailboat, Yacht, Inter-Dimensional Time Travel (Best kept secret of the super-rich)
Prestigious Enough: European Sports Car, Motorboat, Doorless Antique Jeep, 1970s Muscle Car
Where Do You Work Again?: Mustang/Charger/Corvette, Pick-Up Truck, Hondas,

Most Prestigious Breakfasts

Diet of a King: Eggs Benedict With Caviar/Lox, Cup of Espresso and Cream, Fresh-Fruit Crepes With Gourmet Icing on Top
Breakfast of a Champ: Two Cups of Black Coffee On An Empty Stomach, Over-Easy Eggs with Fresh Sausage, French Sounding Pastries
Mildly Prestigious Way To Start The Day: Mimosas, Everything Bagel and Lox, Catered Breakfast at the Office, Leftovers From Last Nights Expensive Restaurant Dinner
Grow The F*ck Up Kid: Adderall (srsly, grow up), 5-Hour Energy, Red Bull, Anything Microwaved

2018 Fiscal Year Prestige Brackets By First Year Salary

Elite: $200,000+
BSD In Training: $150,000 - $199,999
Still Prestigious To the Common Man: $90,000 - $150,000
Child's Play: $65,000 - $90,000
Destined For Mediocrity (No One Will Ever Love You): <$65,000

And that's it folks, thanks for joining us for another annual WSO Prestige Rankings. Do you feel slighted? Degraded? Undervalued? Good, you should. That's it for tonight's presentation- and remember kids - no matter how prestigious you are, there is ALWAYS someone out there with more than you, and it is healthy to internalize the learned inferiority you feel from this.

Comments (149)

Best Response
Jan 10, 2018

Let me guess, you're a UVA grad working in Real Estate in Charlotte making roughly $90k and you're excited about driving your new basic package model 3 to your next vacation in Charleston.

"There's no reason to be the richest man in the cemetery. You can't do business from there." - Colonel Sanders

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Jan 10, 2018

Do you take me as someone who is merely partially prestigious? Only semi-elite?? Just on the cusp of high society??????

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Jan 10, 2018

Nailed it.

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Jan 11, 2018

+SB

"If you're afraid - don't do it, if you're doing it - don't be afraid!"
-- Genghis Khan

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Jan 13, 2018
Max Heiliger:

Let me guess, you're a UVA grad working in Real Estate in Charlotte making roughly $90k and you're excited about driving your new basic package model 3 to your next vacation in Charleston.

I created a mosaic theory with the same result, except my findings depicted him in a white convertible BMW 1 Series, wind in his hair riding down I-26 South (to Charleston).

UVA sticker on the bumper, no doubt. 80% chance boat shoes or pastel colors are involved.

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

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Learn More

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Jan 10, 2018
Isaiah_53_5:

wind in his hair

Most Prestigious Haircuts

Vintage Finance Hair: American Psycho/Gordon Gekko Slick Back
New Era Prestige: Combover (See Jared Kushner)
Associate Cut: The Jew-Fro, Medium-Length Hair Pushed To The Side, Razor Thin Buzz Cut (See Jason Chathom)
Back-Office Look: Receding Hairline Without A Buzzcut (Paired With A Brown Suit), Hair Long Enough To Hang, Completely Bald, The Man Bun

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Jan 17, 2018
Max Heiliger:

Let me guess, you're a UVA grad working in Real Estate in Charlotte making roughly $90k and you're excited about driving your new basic package model 3 to your next vacation in Charleston.

Roasted. +SB

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Jan 18, 2018

Absolutely bodied on his own post. Straight up ratio'd like you see on Twitter.

You have my vote for MOTY already.

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Jan 10, 2018

I laughed, "automatic blowjob" and "tired of winning" were especially humorous. +1

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Jan 10, 2018

+1 for understanding that over-easy eggs are way more prestigious than scrambled eggs.

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Jan 11, 2018

I didn't have to read past the first paragraph to know you went to UVA

wa-hoo-wa, douchebag

+1, 10/10 would def read again

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Jan 13, 2018

the lil son of a bitch probably isn't even in McIntire. His admission to UVA could be impressive had he been out of state, but he's probably just an upper middle class kid from souther VA. Even North Virginia high schooler admissions to UVA is a bit impressive, most likely from the south.

Oh yeah, kid also definitely didn't live on "The Lawn" as a senior.

Yea I know a thing or two about UVA. I got in, but fuck that place, because I went somewhere else, somewhere... PRESTIGIOUS!

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Jan 11, 2018

I am asserting a prestige category above yours'.

Prestigious vehicles:
Rusty Honda
Hang Glider

Prestigious cities:
Chicago
Milwaukee
Holland, MI***

Prestigious vacation destinations:
Anywhere on Lake Michigan, especially the Sleeping Bear Dunes or Washington Island (Midwestern rednecks' Nantucket)

Prestigious schools:
UIUC (duh) > Big Ten >>> UVA

Back to my hang glider and rusty honda. Enjoy your M-series and yacht.

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Jan 10, 2018

You went to Princeton, the most preftigious school there is imo (no MBA program adds more preftige). Don't act coy about your preftige credentials.

Jan 11, 2018
BobTheBaker:

You went to Princeton, the most preftigious school there is imo (no MBA program adds more preftige). Don't act coy about your preftige credentials.

Princeton, the best engineering school in the Ivy League (which is not necessarily saying a great deal), changed its typset to use S in 1793. When are the rest of the liberal arts schools going to catch up?

Also, 2/3 of the grad students at Princeton did their undergrads at state schools. We'll let the undergrads keep the prestige, but state schoolers do much of the actual research behind that prestige. :-)

Seriously, I'm proud of my MFE, but I'm more proud of my UIUC Comp. Sci. undergrad-- the same way I think most grad students feel about their undergrads.

Jan 10, 2018
IlliniProgrammer:

Prestigious schools:
UIUC (duh) > Big Ten >>> UVA

I am calling the Secret Prestige Police now, you will shortly be disposed of and sent to Camp-Prestige for ten years of hard labor.

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Jan 11, 2018
PrestigeCaller:
IlliniProgrammer:

Prestigious schools:
UIUC (duh) > Big Ten >>> UVA

I am calling the Secret Prestige Police now, you will shortly be disposed of and sent to Camp-Prestige for ten years of hard labor.

3/10

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Jan 14, 2018

Nice

Jan 15, 2018
IlliniProgrammer:

I am asserting a prestige category above yours'.

Prestigious vehicles:
Rusty Honda
Hang Glider

Prestigious cities:
Chicago
Milwaukee
Holland, MI***

Prestigious vacation destinations:
Anywhere on Lake Michigan, especially the Sleeping Bear Dunes or Washington Island (Midwestern rednecks' Nantucket)

Prestigious schools:
UIUC (duh) > Big Ten >>> UVA

Back to my hang glider and rusty honda. Enjoy your M-series and yacht.

@IlliniProgrammer what is it with you and a Rusty Honda?

Jan 11, 2018
Pump And Dump:

@IlliniProgrammer what is it with you and a Rusty Honda?

If you have to ask, you'll never understand...

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Jan 16, 2018

My dude where do you usually glide? I'm about to start taking some lessons and start gliding in NorCal

Jan 10, 2018

What are the most prestigious sex acts to engage in?

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Jan 11, 2018
LReed:

What are the most prestigious sex acts to engage in?

I don't know if this qualifies as sex, but I would say teabagging.

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Jan 11, 2018

This is one of the greatest comments I have ever read.

Jan 10, 2018

More Prestige Than God: Walking Out of A Meeting For 7 Minutes to Rub One Out in the Bathroom Stalls, Disappointing Missionary With a Woman Half Your Age and 1/3 of your Weight, Respecting Women
Playboy Status: Pretending to Still Be In College and Bagging Chicks at LES Bars, Exchanging Spouses With Other Rich Dicks, Getting Publicly Outed As a Closet Homosexual by Gawker (Shoutouts Petey Thiel!)
Adequate: Once a Year Sex With Your Wife That Hates You Because You Never Do Shit Around the House or Look After the Kids, Public Hand Jobs, Sex Near/On Large Bodies of Water
Bush League: Paying For Sex, Interesting and Passionate Sex With The Woman You Love, Sex Including More Than Two Persons

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Jan 11, 2018

please post more

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Jan 10, 2018

lol if I banged a chic 1/3rd of my weight she'd be like 56 pounds

Jan 11, 2018

So its prestigious to you to bang 10 year olds?

Follow the shit your fellow monkeys say @shitWSOsays

Life is hard, it's even harder when you're stupid - John Wayne

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Jan 13, 2018

Only three things in this world one should never pay for: Sex, Water, and Pens.

Jan 14, 2018

double post fail forum acting weird

Jan 14, 2018

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Jan 14, 2018

There's nothing prestigious about respecting women, or disrespecting them.

Mar 3, 2019

lol this really cracked me up. Damn it!!

"Be persistent and you will get, be consistent and you will keep it, be grateful and you will get more"

phuckQuotes

Jan 11, 2018

Pretty fun read. The UVA trolling is hilarious. With cities, Charlotte, Houston, and Atlanta are way too high; they are shitholes. Also, LA is too low. And Chicago is above SF.

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Jan 10, 2018

Chill, don't mess with Texas bro. Where would you rank Seattle?

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Jan 11, 2018
BobTheBaker:

Chill, don't mess with Texas bro. Where would you rank Seattle?

Texas has no state or city tax, which is great. And good Mexican food. But for singles who are not from the state originally, the social and cultural scene isn't that great. I'm not saying it's bad, but it's all relative. Dallas/Houston/Austin are better than a lot of U.S. cities but far below NYC, Chicago, and LA.

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Jan 10, 2018

LA is too suburban and suburbs, while safe and convenient, are simply not that prestigious. Because of LA's suburban sprawl, it generally requires one of the less prestigious methods of transportation to travel, as driving oneself is far less prestigious than paying a driver to take you a few blocks.

For these reasons and others, LA is ultimately a more prestigious place to vacation and/or raise a family than it is to work in.

Jan 16, 2018

LA is just a different kind of work, it's not for the socially inept quants who need money or jobs to talk to bitches. LA's currency is social prestige, who you know and what favors you can get make actual dollars a thing of the past.

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Jan 11, 2018

Lol at Chicago above SF

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Jan 11, 2018

San. Francisco can't recruit chicks. Chicks are usually the best judge of prestige.

Based on that method I come up nyc, la, Miami's as the most prestigious.

Array
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Jan 16, 2018

Chicago is undoubtedly above SF, unless you're a SJW or just slow

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Jan 11, 2018
Deal Team Six:

Chicago is undoubtedly above SF, unless you're a SJW or just slow

AMEN.

Jan 11, 2018

Lol

Jan 10, 2018

.

Learn More

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Jan 10, 2018

LA is too suburban and suburbs, while safe and convenient, are simply not that prestigious. Because of LA's suburban sprawl, it generally requires one of the less prestigious methods of transportation to travel, as driving oneself is far less prestigious than paying a driver to take you a few blocks.

For these reasons and others, LA is ultimately a more prestigious place to vacation and/or raise a family then it is to work in. Because of your concerns we have decided to add another bracket to the list:

Most Prestigious Places to Raise a Family
Royalty: Charlottesville, Virginia
Upper 1%: Orange County, Upper-West Side, Greenwich, New Canaan, Buckhead
American Dream: Buckhead, Northern Virginia, Chicago-Suburbs, DFW-Suburbs
Slightly Increased Possibility of Raising at Least One Failure: Anywhere in Maryland, The Entire Midwest Excluding Greater Chicago Suburbs, The Southeast Excluding Virginia

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Jan 10, 2018

"Slightly Increased Possibility of Raising at Least One Failure"

LMAO!

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Jan 11, 2018
PrestigeCaller:

LA is too suburban and suburbs, while safe and convenient, are simply not that prestigious. Because of LA's suburban sprawl, it generally requires one of the less prestigious methods of transportation to travel, as driving oneself is far less prestigious than paying a driver to take you a few blocks.

For these reasons and others, LA is ultimately a more prestigious place to vacation and/or raise a family then it is to work in. Because of your concerns we have decided to add another bracket to the list:

Most Prestigious Places to Raise a Family
Royalty: Charlottesville, Virginia
Upper 1%: Orange County, Upper-West Side, Greenwich, New Canaan, Buckhead
American Dream: Buckhead, Northern Virginia, Chicago-Suburbs, DFW-Suburbs
Slightly Increased Possibility of Raising at Least One Failure: Anywhere in Maryland, The Entire Midwest Excluding Greater Chicago Suburbs, The Southeast Excluding Virginia

Orange County is massive, so you need to break it down more. Newport Beach, for instance, is not even in the same universe as Anaheim.

Buckhead? LOL. It's "upscale" by the standards of the Deep South, but it's not prestigious by any stretch of the imagination.

Chicago's north shore suburbs are super elite and highly underrated. Lake Forest, Kenilworth, Winnetka, Glencoe, are amongst the best suburbs in the country.

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Jan 16, 2018

Which one of the north shore suburbs are you from? It is clear from your post you reside or grew up in one of those

Apr 20, 2018

Buckhead not prestigious

Ignorant yankee spotted

Oct 19, 2018

From the North Shore. Can confirm.

Jan 17, 2018

Buckhead Atlanta?

Mar 11, 2019

Ikr LOL i live there and im not that prestigious

Feb 27, 2019

NW D.C. / Chevy Chase?

Mar 11, 2019

Buckhead ATL is still a shithole

Jan 11, 2018

San Francisco is not prestigious at all. Tech engineers are bottom feeders.

"Work ethic, work ethic" - Vince Vaughn
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Jan 11, 2018
Yankee Doodle:

San Francisco is not prestigious at all. Tech engineers are bottom feeders.

SF is below Chicago, for sure.

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Jan 11, 2018

Haha someone's got a bit of chip on their shoulder :)

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Jan 11, 2018

LOL @ Beverly Hills below Charlotte. Keep hating, NorCal.

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Jan 10, 2018

@PrestigeCaller I just noticed your Astros world series picture, beautiful. Very prestigious.

Jan 10, 2018

Naturally, baseball is the most prestigious sport to hold season tickets for. Football is too redneck, Hockey too obscure and Basketball too....errr...."urban"

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Jan 11, 2018
PrestigeCaller:

Naturally, baseball is the most prestigious sport to hold season tickets for. Football is too redneck, Hockey too obscure and Basketball too....errr...."urban"

MLB playoffs are prestigious, but regular season sucks. Hockey is the most enjoyable major sport to watch in person.

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Jan 11, 2018

OP should do a similar prestige ranking for specific finance jobs/companies to work for.

Jan 10, 2018

Master of the Universe: Amazon - Corporate Finance

Jan 11, 2018

WSO's COO (Chief Operating Orangutan) | My Linkedin

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Jan 11, 2018

The schools are so wrong, but maybe that's intentional

Jan 12, 2018

Tesla over S600 Maybach/Rolls Royce means OP failed immediately.

Jan 10, 2018

OP also has his Algos rigged so everytime someone mentions "Tesla" we buy another share and manipulate the price higher.

Jan 12, 2018

@PrestigeCaller would you mind ranking MBA programs as well? I'll need a definitive list in the next couple of years.

Asking for a friend.

"Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt." --Abraham Lincoln

Jan 10, 2018

Most Prestigious Graduate Degrees

God Tier: Any UVA Degree

Prestigious Enough To Make Asian Parents Proud: Med School, Tier 1 Law School, Harvard/Upenn/MIT Business School

Upper Bounds of Human Achievement: Chicago/Northwestern/Stanford/Berkely/Dartmouth/Columbia/Yale

Worth Taking Out The Loans For: Michigan/Duke/NYU/UCLA/Cornell/UT-Austin/UNC/Carnegie Melon/Emory/Georgetown/Indiania/Washington University/USC/Vanderbilt/Rice/Notre Dame

God Forbid You Have Asian Parents, You Will Be Forced To Commit Seppuku: Ohio State/University of Washington/Penn State/Wisconsin/Texas A&M/BYU/Boston College/Arizona State/U of Arizona

Hot Garbage UIUC, Whatever School @IlliniProgrammer Whore Mother Went To

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Jan 11, 2018

4/10

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Jan 16, 2018

UPenn over Stanford?

Is joke, no?

MIT for a grad you basically failed the hacker test...

Jan 10, 2018

Most Prestigious Parking Spaces

Executive Suite: Reserved Space With Your Own Sign Outside The Office
Master of Capitalism: Reverse Parking Your BMW In The Handicap Zone
Bourgeois: Unassigned Garage Spot
Proletariat: Street

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Jan 14, 2018

can you rank dinners for us? thanks

Jan 10, 2018

Most Prestigious Dinners:

God Tier: UVA Dining Hall
Feast of a King: Kobe Beef, Wagyu, Bluefin Tuna, Octopus (Tentacle), Oysters, Fugu (Pufferfish), Pasta With Squid Ink, Swallows Nest Soup (Must Try)
Diesel Fuel: Lamb, Filet Mignon, Pasta With Mussels, Garlic & White Wine Sauce, Lobster, Escargot, Cioppino, Raw Tuna (When Wrapped In Seaweed - As With Sushi - Becomes One Tier Less Prestigious)
Ole Stand-Bys: Prime Rib, T-Bone, Pasta Pesto, Gnocci With Cream/Mushroom Sauce, Roast Chicken, Sicilian Pizza, Chipoltle Burrito, Authentic Ramen From Chinatown, Seared Salmon/Halibut
"Up-And-Coming": Gourmet Mac n Cheese, Gourmet Grilled Cheese, Eggs Benedict
Trash: Frozen Anything, Store-Bought Pasta Sauce, Breaded/Fried Chicken, Meat Loaf, Lasagna, Dominoes/Papa Johns/Pizza Hut, Q'Doba

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Jan 15, 2018

@PrestigeCaller how about credit cards

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Jan 15, 2018

@PrestigeCaller In honor of Trump's shithole comment, how about countries?

Jan 10, 2018

*From "Shithole Scandal" Thread

PrestigeCaller:

Most Prestigious Shithole Countries To Vacation At

Bosses Only: Zanzibar, Belize, Barbados, Cape Verde
Make Your Back Office Co-Workers Jealous With Your Instagram Pics: Jamaica, Dominican Republic, Puerto Rico, Costa Rica
Ballin' On a Budget but Not Impressing Anybody: Florida (Not a Country; Still a Shithole), Mexico (Cancun),

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Jan 16, 2018

Oh man, this thread has me dying.

How about for High Schools - both to attend and to send your kids?

Jan 10, 2018

high schools bro..? really? Is this only an east coast thing where people care about this shit.. or what? My HS was avg af but ik ppl at HBS/ Wharton from my graduating class, residencies at duke department of medicine... etc

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Jan 16, 2018

Yea Bob, I know you're not Mayflower Material, you don't have to keep telling everyone.

I just want to hear more about UVA Prep, or if waitlisted, maybe Exeter.

Jan 16, 2018

It's "East Hampton" (not "Easthampton") you fucking prole.

Jan 11, 2018

2018 Prestige Rankings: Religion

Predestined: Presbyterianism, Dutch Reformed, Unitarianism

The Old Row: Episcopalianism/Anglicanism, Lutheranism, Methodism

Good for Networking: Judaism, Mormonism, Scientology, various rich people cults and secret societies

Just because your dad owns a store doesn't mean you're well-bred: Catholicism, Baptists, Hinduism

Creepy/Psychotic/Violent: Pentecostalism, Evangelicalism, Islam

"Work ethic, work ethic" - Vince Vaughn
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Jan 17, 2018

What about Mormons?

Jan 11, 2018

Edited into "Good for Networking".

"Work ethic, work ethic" - Vince Vaughn
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Jan 11, 2018

double post

"Work ethic, work ethic" - Vince Vaughn
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Jul 12, 2018

I know the Episcopal Church has been wrecked by an SJW dominated clergy, but inbelieve more US presidents have been Episcopalian than any other denomination. Surely it deserves a place in the predestined tier.

At the very least separate from the Methodist Church. That's like the club Corp of churches.

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Jan 18, 2018

Even though this is something that is very interesting and hilarious. I find it very inspirational, even though i am not working and currently looking out for work, i think this would be motivational anyone that is ambitious

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Jan 18, 2018

Credit cards next.

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Feb 14, 2018

Amex Centurion

Jan 18, 2018

Not gonna lie, I agree with this whole thing, exactly as pretentious as it is. These are my thoughts summed up exactly.

Even the UVA thing, I believe to be 100% accurate in a very unusual way. There's a string of LinkedIn hotties that all went to UVA, work in major IBs, and look like they got in through connections and a perfect set of legs.

Tesla is definitely the car that guys in sweaters with a blazer on top drive because, who gives a fuck about needing to get around? Needing to get around is for the working class. Those guys just drive because it's 'interesting'.

DC and Boston are like adults drinking old fashions or tom Collins from all their privileged loads of cash, while NYC, London, and HK are instant, and constant pussy, because you're young and attractive.

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Feb 14, 2018

I'm pretty sure the UVA thing is troll but ok

Feb 14, 2018

Nice car :)

Feb 14, 2018

Same reason you can call your school Top 5 even though some random publication may rank it as #12 or #2 on any given year. But basically the tiers are pretty clear.

Feb 14, 2018

PwC is large.. we do a lot of things.. from high level strategy consulting all the way down to multi-year implementations. If you end up working with mostly Diamond people you will have very similar experience as @ MBB... a little less $.

Feb 14, 2018
moshennik:

PwC is large.. we do a lot of things.. from high level strategy consulting all the way down to multi-year implementations. If you end up working with mostly Diamond people you will have very similar experience as @ MBB... a little less $.

Similar experience, less money, lower quality exit opps, less prestige on the resume.

But, it's still a solid offer and a good firm.

Feb 14, 2018

Consulting is all about MBB, that's why. There's more difference between MBB and PWC than between GS and Citi.

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Feb 14, 2018

to OP, i am on the west coast PwC post-MBA.. if you have any questions feel free to PM me..

Feb 14, 2018
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Jan 11, 2018
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"Work ethic, work ethic" - Vince Vaughn