Prestige of the girl you're dating?

Do bankers really end up marrying teachers, nurses, flight attendants, etc.?

I'm having a tough time finding a girl that's "on my level" from a education and work background (top university, top BB). I find myself drawn towards ivy league girls (thing for Harvard girls in particular) who are in "prestigious" finance. business, law or medical positions. Success is attractive and it signals a degree of confidence, motivation and level of security in being able to provide for a family.

However, I'm getting a lot more interest from girls who went to less than inspiring schools and have run of the mill jobs. And even if they are quite physically attractive, it's in the back of my mind and it's hard for me to fully commit.

Anybody feel similarly?

Comments (142)

Controversial
Oct 24, 2014

I'm in the same boat as you, bro. I have a hard time taking seriously girls who did not go to top schools and/or have solid jobs. To me it demonstrates a lack of intelligence, work ethic, and ambition. Every time I'm on a date with a girl who has a mediocre job, I can't help but think that she's a gold digger who is going to use me. But if the girl is at least on my level, I'm much less concerned since she has her own money and has her shit together.

This is one reason why so many couples come out of top b-schools. Like attracts like.

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Oct 24, 2014

I was under the impression that b school students worth looking at were dating/married already.

also OP, that's extremely shallow. nothing wrong with wanting someone who's ambitious, but if you're seriously the type of person who judges your significant other based on the prestige of her school and the number on her W2, then I've got no advice for you

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Oct 24, 2014
thebrofessor:

I was under the impression that b school students worth looking at were dating/married already.

also OP, that's extremely shallow. nothing wrong with wanting someone who's ambitious, but if you're seriously the type of person who judges your significant other based on the prestige of her school and the number on her W2, then I've got no advice for you

This.

Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.

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Oct 24, 2014
mbavsmfin:

I'm in the same boat as you, bro. I have a hard time taking seriously girls who did not go to top schools and/or have solid jobs. To me it demonstrates a lack of intelligence, work ethic, and ambition. Every time I'm on a date with a girl who has a mediocre job, I can't help but think that she's a gold digger who is going to use me. But if the girl is at least on my level, I'm much less concerned since she has her own money and has her shit together.

This is one reason why so many couples come out of top b-schools. Like attracts like.

As if you have even close to enough money for a real gold digger to even think about dating you.

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Oct 24, 2014
mbavsmfin:

I'm in the same boat as you, bro. I have a hard time taking seriously girls who did not go to top schools and/or have solid jobs. To me it demonstrates a lack of intelligence, work ethic, and ambition. Every time I'm on a date with a girl who has a mediocre job, I can't help but think that she's a gold digger who is going to use me. But if the girl is at least on my level, I'm much less concerned since she has her own money and has her shit together.

This is one reason why so many couples come out of top b-schools. Like attracts like.

You never disappoint my friend.

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Oct 24, 2014

Just to clarify, it doesn't matter how much money your woman makes. Money has the same importance to women as looks do for guys.

Aug 20, 2017

You are fucking sick...opposites attract!

Jun 24, 2018

;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;

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Jun 30, 2018

Discipline, work ethic, absolutely.

Intelligence? Please.

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Oct 24, 2014

I personally know two bankers in my group who are dating or married to nurses. Also a journalist, two lawyers, stay at home parent, consultant - the list goes on.

I don't think there's a universal answer for your question. Maybe a general preference if you assume all bankers share certain qualities, but it's still a very individual thing at the end of the day.

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Oct 24, 2014

Date what you're interested in... If you like successful people, date successful people. If you like someone who clicks with for different reasons, chase them.

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Oct 24, 2014

some of the strangest people post on wso

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Oct 24, 2014

Marry a teacher, here is why:

-Never worry about your healthcare (allowing you to make moves easier)

-Safety net for retirement (pension).

-No need for daycare during summers.

-Crazy amount of time off for vacations

-Stress level will not be as high when you get home every day as she will not be as burned out as you most likely will be.

Trust me, these things trump "prestige" once you reach a certain point in your life/career.

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Nov 18, 2014

.

Oct 31, 2014
CZtrader:

Marry a teacher, here is why:

-Never worry about your healthcare (allowing you to make moves easier)

-Safety net for retirement (pension).

-No need for daycare during summers.

-Crazy amount of time off for vacations

-Stress level will not be as high when you get home every day as she will not be as burned out as you most likely will be.

Trust me, these things trump "prestige" once you reach a certain point in your life/career.

CZtrader knows exactly what's up. I guess it all depends on personal preference but teachers (especially primary school teachers) are almost always the best wife material IMO.

It's a different case if you want the girl to financially support the family as well, but IMO none of us on WSO would "need" that. Other best wife materials IMO include artists, curators, pianists, violinists, cellists, and charity workers.

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Nov 1, 2014
PARKER153:
CZtrader:

Marry a teacher, here is why:

-Never worry about your healthcare (allowing you to make moves easier)

-Safety net for retirement (pension).

-No need for daycare during summers.

-Crazy amount of time off for vacations

-Stress level will not be as high when you get home every day as she will not be as burned out as you most likely will be.

Trust me, these things trump "prestige" once you reach a certain point in your life/career.

CZtrader knows exactly what's up. I guess it all depends on personal preference but teachers (especially primary school teachers) are almost always the best wife material IMO.

It's a different case if you want the girl to financially support the family as well, but IMO none of us on WSO would "need" that. Other best wife materials IMO include artists, curators, pianists, violinists, cellists, and charity workers.

My buddy is married to a nurse. He was diagnosed last year with leukemia (he has thus far successfully beat it). There is nothing like have a nurse for a wife when you're seriously ill. The OP should keep in mind that a high powered female probably lacks that feminine maternal and caring instinct.

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Apr 4, 2018

Dude, you're naive. Most teachers hate their job. The hot teachers all quit in their 20s to be stay at home moms after marrying rich.

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Jun 26, 2018

Oh and they're immune to sickness since they're around kids all day..... always available to take care of you

Feb 25, 2020

Wait what?

What do you mean teachers get free healthcare?

Oct 24, 2014

You certainly are limiting your options. I've dated a highly successful realtor, a couple girls who work in financial advisory roles, not to mention an attorney who was a partner in her firm. Sure, it's fun knowing you can plan awesome vacations and never feel like it is "all on you', but in the end it damn sure doesn't guarantee true happiness.

Now? Engaged to a grade school teacher. Sure, she doesn't make big bucks. No, she didn't graduate from some ivy school. But, she is fully devoted to her profession no different than myself or the rest of you folks here. I've never been happier compared to all my previous relationships.

Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.

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Aug 20, 2017

I was engaged to a medical doctor...left her and married a first year law student!

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Oct 24, 2014

double post

Get your facts first, then you can distort them as you please.

Oct 24, 2014

Brb dumping my girlfriend her job lacks prestige.. thank you so much wso

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Apr 3, 2018

legit lol'd lmao

Oct 24, 2014

PS there's plenty of girls "on your level" as far as education and work background but if I had to guess you are not on "their level" as far as: ability to speak sentences clearly or personal hygiene.

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Oct 24, 2014

My gf is a school teacher and she is far more intelligent than anyone i've met In finance.

Also ambitious people tend to be more insecure and self absorbed.

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Best Response
Oct 24, 2014

Are there any guides on here for getting a top girlfriend? Think banker/lawyer/doctor. I really don't want to go mid-tier and settle for engineer/accountant, but friends with target girlfriends told me sometimes you can start there and lateral. Any guidance? PS: freshman in HS so take it easy on me, just trying to plan ahead.

Also appreciate any commentary on blonde vs. brunette (mostly on fit here - have heard blondes might be easier to get in to but culture is tighter with brunettes).

Oct 24, 2014
Hugh Myron:

Are there any guides on here for getting a top girlfriend? Think banker/lawyer/doctor. I really don't want to go mid-tier and settle for engineer/accountant, but friends with target girlfriends told me sometimes you can start there and lateral. Any guidance? PS: freshman in HS so take it easy on me, just trying to plan ahead.

Also appreciate any commentary on blonde vs. brunette (mostly on fit here - have heard blondes might be easier to get in to but culture is tighter with brunettes).

I'm quoting this because it's seriously so epic, kudos bro, kudos.

I have to say this: what would redheads be then, back office?

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Oct 24, 2014
thebrofessor:
Hugh Myron:

Are there any guides on here for getting a top girlfriend? Think banker/lawyer/doctor. I really don't want to go mid-tier and settle for engineer/accountant, but friends with target girlfriends told me sometimes you can start there and lateral. Any guidance? PS: freshman in HS so take it easy on me, just trying to plan ahead.

Also appreciate any commentary on blonde vs. brunette (mostly on fit here - have heard blondes might be easier to get in to but culture is tighter with brunettes).

I'm quoting this because it's seriously so epic, kudos bro, kudos.

I have to say this: what would redheads be then, back office?

Back office or backdoor?

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Oct 24, 2014

Non-targets maybe.

Oct 30, 2014

comment of the year

Feb 25, 2020

If you make a lateral move, you will probably be pressured to break your old NDAs, don't.

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Oct 24, 2014

Prestige of a girlfriend? Jesus Christ.

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Oct 25, 2014
Dingdong08:

Prestige of a girlfriend? Jesus Christ.

Agreed. Although I reject the notion of "prestigious" significant other, if we're forced to talk about prestige then it can only really be defined by how hot she is.

Oct 24, 2014

I can't believe the word prestigious is used on your potential loved one for all sorts of reasons that are too long to list.

Oct 24, 2014

OP, I hope that was a sarcastic post.....I really hope so for your sake.....

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Oct 24, 2014

I would only date a girl outside MBB for a dowry > 50 goats.

I mean is this for real? I guess I'm glad that there are ppl like this out there. I have a cousin in-law and she's got a top JD and always has trouble finding dates because she almost certainly makes more money than her potential suitors, which seems to intimidate them. Now in her mid-30s and baby years are quickly dissipating. If there are guys who crave ambition and preftige in a woman, maybe there is hope for the successful girls after all.

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Oct 24, 2014

Before I read this thread I thought this was going to be satire for sure but as always WSO does not disappoint.

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Oct 24, 2014
cauliflowerfractal:

I'm having a tough time finding a girl that's "on my level"

Nothing wrong with going for strong and independent women, but I wouldn't put too much emphasis on their pedigree. Those are traits, not line items on a resume. Other than that, stop using phrases like "on my level" or "prestige", it makes you sound like a tool.

Oct 24, 2014
ArcherVice:

you sound like a tool

agreed

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Oct 24, 2014
ArcherVice:
cauliflowerfractal:

I'm having a tough time finding a girl that's "on my level"

Nothing wrong with going for strong and independent women, but I wouldn't put too much emphasis on their pedigree. Those are traits, not line items on a resume. Other than that, stop using phrases like "on my level" or "prestige", it makes you sound like a tool.

Spot on. I do care that a girl is smart and is passionate about something, but that's not what this thread is about. Sounds like the male OP is a gold-digger...that's a new one.

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Oct 24, 2014

You sound like you would be a real catch for a lucky lady!

Oct 24, 2014

You sound like you would be a real catch for a lucky lady!

Oct 24, 2014

I could imagine few things that would suck more than dating a girl in IBD. Between both of you working 80-90 hours a week when would you have time to see each other? Plus, you would both have nothing going on in your life outside of work, which makes for some pretty fucking boring conversation.

Oct 24, 2014
TheSanchize:

I could imagine few things that would suck more than dating a girl in IBD. Between both of you working 80-90 hours a week when would you have time to see each other? Plus, you would both have nothing going on in your life outside of work, which makes for some pretty fucking boring conversation.

I can only think of a few couples I know where they both have high paying/pressure careers, and the one that leaps to mind are both successful lawyers but they're those weird people who take pictures of all of their food and post it on facebook and they dress their little rat sized dogs up in people clothes, take pics and post them also. Moral of the story? You don't want to be those people. Marry a teacher.

Oct 24, 2014
Dingdong08:

I can only think of a few couples I know where they both have high paying/pressure careers, and the one that leaps to mind are both successful lawyers but they're those weird people who take pictures of all of their food and post it on facebook and they dress their little rat sized dogs up in people clothes, take pics and post them also. Moral of the story? You don't want to be those people. Marry a teacher.

Sounds like my wife and I, except our dogs are a rottweiler and a mid-sized mutt and neither would stand for being dressed up. We don't photograph our food, but we have a friend who does.

@cauliflowerfractal - I married a ex-Big Law lawyer, now banker (EAF, covering Latam out of NY) who works longer hours than I do and is smarter than me in many ways.

I love to talk about her (as anyone who has read enough of my posts probably knows) but the prestige opps for showing her off are terribly low in a banking career. I actually need to really try hard to engineer an event where I can get her in front of people I work with.

I did manage to get her in front of an old regional head once at a charity function and that worked very, very well for me. Largely it helped that I was in Asia at the time, my wife is ethnically Cantonese, my regional head was a strong headed lady and the optics of having a strong minded ethnic Chinese wife in Asia ("he knows the culture") who could argue intelligently with my regional head ("he isn't terrified of strong women") was good marketing. The regional head would ask after my wife for years afterwards.

I'd love to get her in front of my current NY bosses, largely as they are the sort of guys who would appreciate a ballsy woman who is not in charge of them, she's the sort of person who would deliberately try to shock them (eg she's discovered that Americans find "c*nt" more offensive than Australians and deploys it liberally now) and they are the sort of guys who would find that titallating.

There's potential for social prestige in being married to someone who is smart and accomplished, but most of our friends are not in banking and, luckily, care more about the quality of our characters than the size of our pay checks or the prestige of the deals we're invovled in.

What I do value in the relationship is intellectual stimulation and a certain similarity in experience. As we're both operating in the banking world, we can much more readily understand the context, politics and implications of work stories we tell each other. For example, if I say a banker is "a relationship guy", she knows exactly what I mean, the nuances of what I'm telling her and we can avoid long discourses on what that means. We can also give each other advice that is useful, although I think that's easy to overstate the benefit of that advice. Having someone who understand the work story context is more beneficial than the advice, probably more for her than me as she's a "dump the work stress on the partner" type, whereas I do that less often.

Otherwise, the intellectual stimulation mainly comes through talking about stuff completely unrelated to work - geopolitics, culture, arts etc. We don't have children and so have a lot of energy and intellectual capacity left for talking about interesting stuff rather than whether some kid has crapped her nappy yet. The intellectual frission we get through conversations is fantastic.

I've had relationships where I was with a less intelligent partner and I'm very happy I ended up finding and marrying someone who has a brain and the willingness to use it.

Now, that doesn't mean you need to find someone in a high paying career or who matches you qualification for qualification. I have quiet a few female friends who have only one university degree, but are intelligent and empathetic enough that I think that could keep me intellectually stiumulated. That could well be a teacher.

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Oct 24, 2014

One of these things is not like the other: screw driver, shovel, rake, OP, Vitamin C

heister:

Look at all these wannabe richies hating on an expensive salad.

https://arthuxtable.com/

Dec 21, 2014

delete

Oct 30, 2014

OP, because OP is a faggot?

Oct 24, 2014

I love WSO.

mbavsmfin:

I don't wear watches bro. Because it's always MBA BALLER time!

Oct 24, 2014

You need to date a Veterinarian for these reasons:

1) They deal with pets

2) They are highly educated

4) They are very nice

5) Super passionate

If you don't agree then you clearly aren't a banker so don't bother disagreeing.

You know what else is fat, RUDENESS

Oct 24, 2014

Most of the consulting/finance IVY league dingbats I used to date were prestige whores, gets very annoying. Sure they're driven, but when it came to:

Conversation: very formal and boring.
Sex: horrible, they expect you to maneuver.
Activities: social events with other prestige whores.

I've found more common ground and fun with Big4 tax accountants, middle school teachers, and dermatologists... for some reason...

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Oct 24, 2014

Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, knows how to get down like dermatologists.

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Oct 24, 2014
DickFuld:

Nobody, and I mean NOBODY, knows how to get down like dermatologists.

So my wife and I just became friend with a very recently divorced female dermatologist (our kids go to school together) who's pretty attractive. Should I push for a threesome? Spice up suburban married life?

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Jun 30, 2018
SocratesIsMortal:

I've found more common ground and fun with Big4 tax accountants, middle school teachers, and dermatologists... for some reason...

Lol, wtf? CPA is a solid upper middle class career which requires a masters degree - and Big Four offers require top grades and/or top feeder degree(s). And dermatology is literally the most competitive residency program after medical school - and one of the highest paying specialties. And middle/high school teacher requires a masters degree in most states. So, not exactly bottom of the prestige barrel, bud.

Oct 24, 2014

you're a fucking loser

Don't listen to anyone, everybody is scared.

Oct 24, 2014

Medicine girls are the worst, they're allergic to fun

Apr 4, 2018

Really? Many of the med- students and residents I know are technically alcoholics.

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Apr 5, 2018

Agreed. In the UK medical students have the reputation of partying the hardest. They study the hardest but then proceed to get a night's worth of alcohol and drugs in them in about 1 hour.

Its honestly an amazing sight. Before a party you could be having a conversation with them about cutting edge chemical processes for the optimisation of cancer drug discovery and two hours later that same person is doing belly shots of vodka and dropping acid like its Woodstock

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Jun 29, 2018

can confirm

Oct 25, 2014

Why would you care where your girl went to school? Is she sweet, caring, cute, attractive, feminine, and slim? That's what's important.

Is she working in a high or low stress job? Hint: she's going to hit the wall pretty early if its the former. Does she eat healthy? Does she enjoy cooking? Hint: the best women do. Does she come from a good family? Does she swear? Hint: women that swear are repulsive. Does she dress well? Is she, or was she, a whore? Does she wear short skirts and low cut tops? Hint: No self respecting women does.

Go on a university exchange. You will meet 50+ American girls, 50+ European girls, 20 Brits and 10 Aussies. Mark my words, you will be able to pick out the Europeans girls. They are are class above the Aussies, Brits and Americans in every respect.

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Aug 20, 2017

holy shit I can't tell if this is satire but it's hilarious.

Jun 30, 2018

" Is she, or was she, a whore?"

How could you EVER confirm this? You couldn't - impossible. Whores generally get the slutting out of their system and turn into wine drinking church goers in their mid late 20s. (And if she's clean and childless who really cares?)

Oct 25, 2014

Where do rich girls hand out? I wanna marry into wealth.

heister:

Look at all these wannabe richies hating on an expensive salad.

https://arthuxtable.com/

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Oct 25, 2014

All you need to know about women: the Hot Crazy Matrix

http://www.foxsports.com/college-football/outkick-...

Oct 25, 2014
cauliflowerfractal:

Do bankers really end up marrying teachers, nurses, flight attendants, etc.?

I'm having a tough time finding a girl that's "on my level" from a education and work background (top university, top BB). I find myself drawn towards ivy league girls (thing for Harvard girls in particular) who are in "prestigious" finance. business, law or medical positions. Success is attractive and it signals a degree of confidence, motivation and level of security in being able to provide for a family.

However, I'm getting a lot more interest from girls who went to less than inspiring schools and have run of the mill jobs. And even if they are quite physically attractive, it's in the back of my mind and it's hard for me to fully commit.

Anybody feel similarly?

Just imagine. How in the heck did your ancestors procreate every generation for 1 billion years without Ivy League Wall Street banker girls around...?

Oct 25, 2014

This thread is hilarious

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Oct 25, 2014

If you're chasing prestige in yourlife, chances of you having a ruinous mid-life crisis are very high.

Are you guys in your 20s aware of mid-life crises and are you planning ahead in your career and life choices to minimise the risk of having one?

Oct 25, 2014

i understand what you mean...sadly, with time, your bar will get lower...

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Oct 25, 2014

My wife and I were on the same level of prestige after undergrad. But then she went to Harvard Business School and I went to Wharton so she left me because I wasn't prestigious enough. Stanford MBA's were her cut-off. She let me know after I get my CFA my prestige would be equivalent to her's and she may give our marriage another go.

Just yesterday, I was shopping at the local supermarket and realized I had purchased the store brand butter instead of Land'O'Lakes. I immediately went back to the store and returned my butter for a full refund because it wasn't "prestigious enough." There was just no way I could smear store brand butter on my Aunt Jemima pancakes which are equivalent to a Harvard MBA.

Daily, I find myself measuring the prestige of things as insignificant as the pens I use for work. There is just no way I could touch anything but a Pilot G2-07......

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Oct 25, 2014

I have been with my Griffins for three years and I should land a job at a 90+ billion AUM company. She's going to be a radiologist tech and she's stayed with me though all of it and never once brought up money. I think it depends on the girl not the profession.

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Oct 28, 2014

I have always wanted to fuck a flight attendant. They just seem like such freaks.

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Oct 28, 2014

I thought this was going to be about prestige = hotness. I'm very disappointed.

Robert Clayton Dean: What is happening?
Brill: I blew up the building.
Robert Clayton Dean: Why?
Brill: Because you made a phone call.

Oct 30, 2014

The Virgin army rises up again I see.

Oct 30, 2014

preftigous girls don't work Bro, they come from preftigous families. Marrying well means membership at Maidstone, Pine Valley, Round Hill, etc.

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Nov 2, 2014

I totally agree with OP. IF a girl is wealthy before we start dating, then she's more likely to agree to a Prenup if we get married. Since I won't have to worry about giving away half my net worth if I divorce the bitch, I'd def say that the wealthy girls offer better exit ops.

Nov 3, 2014

I know this is a finance forum but to equate top tier finance programs with intelligence is so ridiculous. People get into finance for two reasons: Money or they actually like it. However only a baboon would associate greed with intelligence. To each their own but on the spectrum of intellectual fields there isn't even a category for finance. I love finance. I get good grades and am happy with my life but to call myself intelligent would be the absolute dumbest thing I could ever think to say.

Someone is ambitious because they want a career that earns themselves a high salary? How about a higher understanding of life? What's really more valuable? I value the opinion of a PhD in physics or philosophy any day over a Harvard undergrad in Economics or Finance.

You have a lot to learn buddy and I was born in the 90s. Be happy defining your entire life by a paycheck.

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Apr 4, 2018

Word. I thought you go into finance because pre-med was too hard (and blood is too gross) and pre-law was too boring.

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Nov 3, 2014

I know this is a finance forum but to equate top tier finance programs with intelligence is so ridiculous. People get into finance for two reasons: Money or they actually like it. However only a baboon would associate greed with intelligence. To each their own but on the spectrum of intellectual fields there isn't even a category for finance. I love finance. I get good grades and am happy with my life but to call myself intelligent would be the absolute dumbest thing I could ever think to say.

Someone is ambitious because they want a career that earns themselves a high salary? How about a higher understanding of life? What's really more valuable? I value the opinion of a PhD in physics or philosophy any day over a Harvard undergrad in Economics or Finance.

You have a lot to learn buddy and I was born in the 90s. Be happy defining your entire life by a paycheck.

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Nov 17, 2014

So funny and weird for me as a girl to read all this stuff. If you guys have problems finding a "suitable" (or whatever) girl while having a high paying / pressure job, what should then girls do who are in the same situation? It's a way more difficult.

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Nov 17, 2014

I'm going to answer this seriously (which I know is dumb considering) but honestly I want a girl who has a less demanding job than me (that's also not to say that demanding automatically equals intelligent or ambitious). If I am working long hours I want to know that, when I am free, we actually have time to spend together. My current gf is like that. She understands if I'm pulling 80 hours this week and goes out of her way to make things easier for me outside of work. If I'm logging in from home on a Sunday she goes out and drops my dry cleaning off/picks up food/etc. It makes us a good team. Plus she has more time to spend in the gym.

That's what I prefer, anyways.

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Nov 17, 2014

@AllDay_028

Agree. That's exactly what I mean. That sounds super for you as a guy.
But imagine it the other way around - a girl working 80-100 hrs a week and a guy having a lot of free time. This doesn't seem to be so great any more. Moreover I think it won't work in most cases.

Nov 17, 2014
Akinakin:

But imagine it the other way around - a girl working 80-100 hrs a week and a guy having a lot of free time. This doesn't seem to be so great any more. Moreover I think it won't work in most cases.

My wife works longer hours than me. I love it. It means I can spend more time on my own hobbies when I'm not working.

Nov 17, 2014
Akinakin:

@AllDay_028

Agree. That's exactly what I mean. That sounds super for you as a guy.

But imagine it the other way around - a girl working 80-100 hrs a week and a guy having a lot of free time. This doesn't seem to be so great any more. Moreover I think it won't work in most cases.

At least you have the pleasure of knowing you are prestigious enough for guys like the OP?

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Nov 17, 2014

@AllDay_028

Hm maybe the pleasure of knowing. But that's it. I don't think it's a good idea to be with someone only because of prestige. At least not for me.

What I mean - in your situation it works fine, but the other way round it's somehow weird (it depends of course). And a relationship where both work so much is also difficult.

Nov 17, 2014
Akinakin:

@AllDay_028

Hm maybe the pleasure of knowing. But that's it. I don't think it's a good idea to be with someone only because of prestige. At least not for me.

What I mean - in your situation it works fine, but the other way round it's somehow weird (it depends of course). And a relationship where both work so much is also difficult.

Ya, it was a joke lol.

Dating as a female banker or whatever other demanding profession is hard, I completely agree with you.

Dec 2, 2014

Sorry mate, can't relate. I met my GF in college and she's working in consulting (think MBB). Everything's been great and we're planning for things to get even greater.

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Dec 2, 2014

Sorry mate, can't relate. I met my GF in college and she's working in consulting (think MBB). Everything's been great and we're planning for things to get even greater.

Dec 4, 2014

Would an accomplished scientist with a PhD from Harvard fall in the prestige category even though she doesn't make much money? I guess not, because you only listed bankers/doctors/lawyers. You sound like my mom when she's defining good future husband material. Maybe you're my parents' age, in that case I completely get where you're coming from.

Seriously though, it's so obvious when a guy tries to show off where he went to school or that he works in some prestige banker role. Turn off.

Dec 4, 2014

ive been dating a girl on and off since undergrad who is doing her phd in something in astronomy at a top school. majority of what she does goes over my head and on an intellectual and intelligence level she would smash 99% of the people in banking or finance but she still does not and prolly will earn nearly as much as I would (assuming things go smoothly for me).

so I guess she fails the OP's prestige level scale lol

Dec 23, 2014

The only contenders in The NYC Prestige Marathon (sponsored in part by Goldman Sachs LevFin, Dorsia, and The Art of Charm Podcast) are insecure assholes who are probably 5'6.5" (oh sorry...5'8") and post questions like "does my MD hate me because I was wearing an Hermes tie?"

No one cares.

Dec 5, 2014

Thing is, many people in Finance subscribe to isolating themselves from practically everyone else and become a self-select group. The outside world couldn't care less about the right reservation at the best steakhouses or whether you have an MBA from a top 10 bschool or whether you have a sweet ride, or whether you just slept with a NY aspiring model. Patrick Bateman is satire. It isn't real for the majority of the world's population.

Apr 9, 2018

There is no Patrick Bateman, only the idea of one

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Aug 20, 2017

Hurtle your body from the most prestigious bridge you can find

Aug 20, 2017

You are one big juicy lie. The worth of a woman is more than what she has studied!

Apr 3, 2018

You can't stereotype a woman based on her job.

That being said, I dated a woman who went from target > banking. We were always in competition over anything & everything, both wanted to lead the relationship and after an amazing two years, it burst into flames like a Die Hard movie.

What concert costs 45 cents? 50 Cent feat. Nickelback.

Apr 3, 2018

Does OP not realize that investment banking isn't in the top 10% of intellectually demanding jobs?

Keep in mind that intellectually demanding is vastly different than demanding of time

Apr 4, 2018

In an ideal world, no girls would have a job/income.

But unfortunately, (the ugly women, also known as) feminis(m)(ts), ruined everything.

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Apr 4, 2018

In my experience upper class girls tend to have awful morals, high infidelity rate, think they ''earned'' respect after their parents set them up for top schools and jobs, want to ''have fun''/not start a family.
Sure, maybe they can speak 4 languages, dress sexy etc. so I can understand the lure. They'll also be single at 35 and have a midlife crisis after which they'll take a trip around the world. I met a handful of exceptions anyway that were good people.

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Apr 4, 2018

Not to compare women to cars, but it's kinda like buying a high end car.

The expense isn't the initial purchase, it's the high cost in the up keep that can get crazy.

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Apr 5, 2018

Depending on the girl, it can be a fair comparison.

Apr 4, 2018

Funny to see so much hate directed at OP... while we all watch Billions and can't stand the unlettered white trash Bobby married to (and is currently in process of divorcing).

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Apr 4, 2018

Pretty terrible trolling attempt, 4/10.

"When you stop striving for perfection, you might as well be dead."

Apr 4, 2018
cauliflowerfractal:

Do bankers really end up marrying teachers, nurses, flight attendants, etc.?

I'm having a tough time finding a girl that's "on my level" from a education and work background (top university, top BB). I find myself drawn towards ivy league girls (thing for Harvard girls in particular) who are in "prestigious" finance. business, law or medical positions. Success is attractive and it signals a degree of confidence, motivation and level of security in being able to provide for a family.

However, I'm getting a lot more interest from girls who went to less than inspiring schools and have run of the mill jobs. And even if they are quite physically attractive, it's in the back of my mind and it's hard for me to fully commit.

Anybody feel similarly?

This sounds like a healthy way to screen for potential life partners.

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Apr 5, 2018

Look, at the end of the day, if you are looking to be with someone, be with someone you want to be with.

That might sound simple, or maybe even somewhat shallow, but get what you need. If you want a girl with 2 MBAs, go find that. But don't expect someone to be everything, i.e. smart/funny/fit/caring/thoughtful/not crazy etc.

Everyone is an individual, and we all need individual things. I know usually when a guy says they want a girl to be something or a type of way, they kinda get a harsh reaction, but on the flip side some women tend to be very picky about their mates (he HAS to be 6ft+, must drive a lexus).

If you really, realllly want to date a women in high finance, thats fine, but ask yourself what would you do if you found a women who checked all the boxes but was a teacher? (Hopefully you've figured this out over 4 years).

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Apr 5, 2018

I was wondering why I just got blown up with ~10 SBs, looks like this thread is back again.

Apr 9, 2018

Don't understand the MS, I would be concerned about this as well; so was my dad

Apr 10, 2018

My opinion is you're going about it the wrong way. Considering you're already connected with your ivy-league/BB network you shouldn't need to be too concerned about vetting girls to make sure they're up to your standard if you stick to your normal social circles. Finding an SO is based entirely on feeling and not fact and I hope when you do find the girl you're truly interested that your judgement/skepticism doesn't get in the way.

Apr 12, 2018

This comment comes across as a bit elitist don't you think? I feel like I can go to an Ivy League school and work at a prestigious bank but still have diverse social circles..

Apr 10, 2018

Really?

"Work ethic, work ethic" - Vince Vaughn
Apr 14, 2018

Statistically ofc men are way more often ready to date/marry down re: income/skills than the other way around. Since bankers - contrary to real celebs - usually are also not that famous that it would be hard to meet someone who is not primarily interested in your money/fame in the first place, i am pretty sure most from the financial class decide also primarily by (subjective) beauty like every other average man. Personally i think education and ckeverness are very sexy but there are ofc traits which are able to outbalance it.

Apr 14, 2018

.............

Apr 14, 2018

[Deleted]

Apr 14, 2018

Would you be interested if she had no connections? If not, there's your answer

Apr 14, 2018

See the edit part.

Tengleha, same.

Apr 14, 2018

Do you not have a soul?

Apr 14, 2018

Dude I can't believe you even have to ask this question. A connection at GOLDMAN SNACKS?!?!

There's 3 things in life that are more important that anything.
1. Being an investment banker
2. Being an investment banker in NYC
3. Being an investment banker in NYC who works at Goldman Snacks.

There's a few things that (shockingly) this takes a priority over.
1. Your family
2. Your health
3. The health of your family
4. Your happiness
5. The happiness of your family

If that man needs his shoes shined, YOU SHINE HIS SHOES. If the mom needs her dress hemmed then by god you find a needle and you hem that damn dress. Afterwards, 'accidentally' leave your resume and squash racket on the kitchen counter. You'll be chilling with the boss man Lloyd B before you have the time to check your first direct deposit.

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Apr 14, 2018

Shit.

Why not just marry her and chill on the inheritance.

Array

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Apr 14, 2018

The funny thing about this thread is that I got shit because people thought I would do it and then because I said I wasn't going to.

Damned if you do, damned if you don't.

Apr 14, 2018

Know a guy who dated a girl so that he could get an appointment to a service academy.
Definitely worth it for him.

Apr 14, 2018

Jesus Christ - I was hoping you would at least say the Dad is a Cabinet member or something.

Jun 26, 2018

Maybe you should give a "lowly" teacher a chance. Might be surprised by her intellectual prowess, and maybe you should judge her based on her overall character, not just her title.

Jun 26, 2018

tl;dr

Marry for the money because you can always learn to love.

Array

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Jun 26, 2018
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Jun 29, 2018
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"Work ethic, work ethic" - Vince Vaughn
Mar 25, 2020
Jul 4, 2018
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No pain no game.

Feb 25, 2020
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