What Are You Most Insecure About?

Let's be honest this forum is filled with plenty of incredibly hard-working, bright, ambitious people. A sizeable chunk of us will go on to make more than 99% of Americans. Despite all that, I imagine many of you, myself included are still very insecure. 

What is it that you are most insecure about?

I'll start, I'm not exactly handsome, and only 5'10. My fear is that if I ever become successful, and pursue a long-term relationship with a woman, she will have an ulterior motive to divorce me for my money. So, I'm hoping to meet someone when I'm younger and not have to worry about them being a gold-digger. 

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Comments (221)

  • Intern in AM - Other
Jan 22, 2021 - 9:30pm

girl here, tried my best to lose weight and exercise but still have some muffin top & 0 hips :/ so thinking of plastic surgery to fix it bc i rly want the ig model body

Jan 23, 2021 - 9:33am

Don't do surgery!! There is a way. Determination and consistency!

Start with some sort of diet. Keto or something similar. And do cardio! You can do it!!

Go all the way

  • Intern in AM - Other
Jan 23, 2021 - 10:19am

Exercise don't fix hip dips, look at bodybuilders for example. Sometimes surgery is the only way to get that rly curvy hourglass shape. Also I tried keto but its too hard to not overeat calories so now I'm just doing low carb

  • Intern in AM - Other
Jan 23, 2021 - 11:17pm

I am not overweight and have never been overweight, so gastric sleeve surgery is probably not suited for me from both a physical appearance and health perspective. I was talking about lipo & a BBL just bc I naturally have 0 curves lol. And yeah I get that, I grew up doing ballet, thought of going pro but my body type didn't make the cut and I gave it all up completely to go to college. I think that has affected my perception & relationship with food as well

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  • Intern in IB-M&A
Jan 24, 2021 - 12:36am

I relate to this so much. Definitely your choice, but I think a point to be made for invasive vs non-invasive treatments is that if a trend of a certain body type comes and goes, you'll still be stuck with the BBL look. What happens if in 5 years your current body type is the most popular? BBL's give a look that is very trendy right now and I would always be worried that people will be able to look at my body 10 years from now and think, oh, she hopped on that trend (at least for women who usually can tell when people get a BBL). 

Also, I wouldn't spare a second thought to any of the guys commenting on this post. I would argue that most guys aren't aware that most female influencers with greater than 30k+ followers have had some level of work done (whether invasive or noninvasive) because they simply don't talk about those topics in the same way girls do on a regular basis. The ones who say "just be natural and everything will work out" also love girls like alexis ren and sierra skye who openly deny the fact they've spent thousands on their bodies (or will say shit like, "I've never gone under the knife", when they've had $50k in noninvasive treatments done) when everyone discusses how they go to the same handful of plastic surgeons in and around LA. 

you do you tho

  • Intern in AM - Other
Jan 24, 2021 - 12:58am

personally im not into the extremely dramatic look, but just slightly more curvy with more volume and a snatched waist. Which is why doing research on surgeons is extremely important, you have to find someone who is on the same page as you aesthetically. I've put a deposit down with somebody whose aesthetic is more natural and aligns with what I'm looking for. Can pm you the dr's name if you're ever interested. I'd avoid those factory style clinics in Miami as well.

And agreed, most men don't realize all the influencers and fitness models who they think have the "ideal" body type of big tits, tiny waist and fat ass have had work done. These girls obviously won't be honest about their surgeries otherwise no one would be buying into their workout or diet plans or bs supplement products. Kinda like how Madison Beer also denies plastic surgery to death but hides behind a bush while waiting for her appointment at a clinic lmao. The "just be natural" guys are really buying into the diet culture bs that fitness models promote which is unfortunate. You can have the perfect diet and exercise routine and still won't ever look like Alexis Ren bc of genetics.

Would also add that noninvasive treatments like coolsculpting or emsculpt give very little results unless you're already extremely skinny to start with. You'd be better off saving up for actual lipo/BBL

Jan 24, 2021 - 6:13pm

Damn... not only do I gotta ask for a girls id but also her surgery report hahaha go natural. It comes with hard work and many life lessons also way hotter when a girl is less plastic more natural

  • Intern in AM - Other
Jan 24, 2021 - 6:16pm

I feel like you've missed the entire point of the above post but each to their own. Things you see on social media are 99% not real and no one looks like that in real life

  • Intern in IB-M&A
Jan 24, 2021 - 8:42pm

Never in my life have I heard a man describe a woman as naturally beautiful, and then point to someone who is actually natural as an example. 

Jan 27, 2021 - 1:20am

You do you girl! But just going to say that physical beauty isn't everything.

Average looks + solid self esteem >>> Drop dead gorgeous + poor self esteem. The better you look as a female, the higher your self esteem needs to be (and based on more than just your looks), because it makes you a target for scrotes and all sorts of male undesirables. I'd liken looks to volatility (better looking = fatter tails in the probability distribution) and self esteem as the actual skill to make it go in your favour, especially if you're working in finance.

A hottie with poor self esteem can just get manipulated without anything to show for, whereas an average female with solid self esteem and good EQ can hold her own better / even manipulate men back (all the finance bros here going to be up in arms but men never realise when they've been manipulated, it's funny and sad at the same time)

I don't buy into the whole "everyone is beautiful" shit either. There are different types of physical beauty, but it's fairly objective. What's more important is that you know it shouldn't affect how you value yourself and how you want to be treated

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  • Intern in AM - Other
Jan 27, 2021 - 9:43pm

Damn ur spitting the truth here. Just broke things off w a dude who had a gf the whole time we were "talking" :/ so i got played and my perception is warped. But agreed, that's something I have to work on and confidence has to come from the inside

Feb 5, 2021 - 11:13pm

Find a doctor to perscribe you thyroid - but a t3/t4 mix, preferally NDT. As long as you don't go hyperthyroid take it even if your labs are in the reference range. Tell doctor you want to go by clinical picture not labs. You will feel better, weight will normalize. Seriously this will work. Do some research on it - used to be very widely used with no real risks/side effects (as long as you dont go hyperthyroid).

I am not a doctor and this not medical advice, this is purely informational.

  • Intern in AM - Other
Feb 6, 2021 - 10:14am

Am already at a normal weight, boobs will deflate more if I drop even more weight. Precise body sculpting through PS is the way to go

Jan 23, 2021 - 9:15am

You should try to fix what you are insecure about.  Many people are their own toughest critic and taking action makes you feel better about yourself.   If you have concerns about looks, improve them by dressing more stylish or working out.  Most women probably prefer a guy who is successful but they are not usually looking for the guy with the biggest wallet.  With that said, success is not only a function your income or net worth.  Plenty of women like smart, funny guys who may not have much money.  

I have been a little insecure about my abs but I am working on it.  I would like to be the guy with the six pack but I am not sure if it is going to happen, though.  
 

When I was a kid/teen, I was very insecure about looking young.  I felt like it would have a negative impact on getting girls.  Some of it was irrational.

http://www.series65examtutor.com
  • Intern in IB-M&A
Jan 24, 2021 - 3:11pm

Leg lengthening surgery is a thing! Costs an arm and a leg (figuratively but also literally) but you should be able to save up for it if you work in IB

  • Intern in IB-M&A
Jul 15, 2021 - 10:54pm

once I saw a picture of putin who is 5'7 next to trump and the realization that he is one of my powerful figures in the world, my height is no longer something that I even give a second thought to 

I mean just look at any photo of putin ... you dont even think about his height you just think about how he is such a dominant figure 

im 5'9 btw

Jan 25, 2021 - 4:37pm

right amount: if you're putting away over 25% of your pay, you're on your way for financial independence, eventually. if you're saving over 40%, you're on your way to early retirement. (note, this is not mathematical, just what I've seen based on experience)

right place: don't load up in company stock, participate via coinvestments, but also have a PA that's largely set and forget, be it index funds, a folio of blue chips, mutual funds, or an advisor, just have it spread around a bit so if your coinvestments shit the bed you won't go to the poorhouse

those adages are appropriate for just about everyone

Jan 23, 2021 - 3:11pm

The lack of a linear path forward in my career. 

My friends who got IB jobs obviously have a whole lot of exit opps that are directly relevant to them. Or those who became accountants or lawyers can basically stick it out and eventually make partner somewhere. 

In my case it's just not really clear where my skills are useful. I feel like I'm learning things, and I'm being worked pretty hard, but I've still got a pretty hard hustle when it comes to finding a relevant exit opp. 

Jan 26, 2021 - 2:02am

Appreciate the kind words. In my case it's more that I've cornered myself into a niche part of the market, and although I personally enjoy it there seem to be very few job openings relevant to what I'm doing. I'm sure everything will work out for the best as long as I keep doing what you say - learning and networking - but I'm envious of people whose careers are so prestigious and relevant (IB, MBB consulting etc) that they are in demand pretty much everywhere. 

Jan 23, 2021 - 4:15pm

Rush2112

My lack of silver bananas

Here you go

http://www.series65examtutor.com
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Most Helpful
  • Prospect in IB-M&A
Jan 23, 2021 - 4:31pm

honestly probably lack of solid friends

Feb 1, 2021 - 4:36pm

I only have one friend (I will probably end up investing with him this year in real estate) and fellow roommate that know my net worth (my sister knows too).  Other than that I don't think anyone else really needs to know my net worth.  AKA it only gives them leverage against me is the way I see it.  

Jan 25, 2021 - 4:46pm

have you ever had solid friends? if so, what happened? have you tried keeping in touch?

I had this issue early in my post-college years, and found I wasn't being a giver enough. as soon as I got in the habit of being a better friend to people I wanted as my friends, the friendship improved. 

if you haven't ever had solid friends, we may need to work on more, but I am sorry for your predicament, it is fixable though!

  • Prospect in IB-M&A
Jan 23, 2021 - 9:27pm

My face/body genetics. Grew up as a fat kid (parents were fat, what do you expect). Go into sports (namely wrestling) in HS but still remained average 20%ish bf year-round. Spent 8ish months lifting seriously and adding a good amount of muscle to my frame late HS/early college. Now I've cut down to 10% bf and I realized my face is literally just round. Dropping any further (for me) just doesn't seem to be sustainable long term from both happiness (test levels, hunger, tiredness) and muscle growth perspectives. All the veins and abs in the world can't stop the fact that my face is very wide, my jawline isn't super defined and the bones of my hips come out JUST wide enough that I don't have a solid V-taper. If I wasn't a pussy who spent too much time on youtube watching very smart people break down the pharmacology of anabolics, I'd probably be cycling sarms right now. I also retain water very easily (less so when lowering sodium and carb intake, but still significantly more than others) which doesn't help face bloating. If I sit in a sauna or take a diuretic my midsection looks insanely different. 

Jan 23, 2021 - 10:41pm

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"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

  • Analyst 2 in IB - Ind
Jan 23, 2021 - 11:19pm

I feel so undeserving. I work hard. Perfectionist. Go all the way for my friends people at work. I overdo everything but I feel so weird when a guy is so nice to me on a date or is nice without asking for anything in return or when a friend listens to me or someone praises me at work (my whole team says im the most hardworking one on the team - but I still question myself every time). There is never nothing I can do to make myself feel like im enough

Jan 24, 2021 - 12:55am

Have you ever considered working on making yourself happy?  Perfectionist to a degree, too much of it makes life difficult.

You feel you are always at a disadvantage that you pull the extra hours to make it matter?

I think you would benefit well from positive reinforcement exercises.

  • Analyst 1 in IB - Gen
Jan 24, 2021 - 1:45am

Used to feel self-conscious about my ug school - serious nontarget by standards of the NY market. But now I actually have some pride about it. What many don't realize until later is that someone who didn't take the cookie-cutter path in life is, a majority of the time, far more interesting, unique, down to earth, and more fun to be around compared to the typical rich NE area -> ivy -> BB shmucks (no harm meant if you fit that bill, just oftentimes the truth). Don't mistake your uniqueness for shortcoming.

Feb 12, 2021 - 8:15pm

Oof I can relate to this a lot. I was extremely self conscious about my background growing up. My family was a little messed up and I was embarrassed by them for so long and tried to hide it, even from people I was in romantic relationships with. Over time I came to appreciate the challenges I faced in childhood. Adversity made me tough and now I'm proud of where I am. 

It's nice to see that others have had a similar experience :)

  • Intern in AM - Other
Jan 24, 2021 - 2:14am

same here didn't realize I had an ED until it got out of control. Have you tried therapy?

  • Analyst 2 in IB - Ind
Jan 24, 2021 - 11:18pm

Have ED too if you mean eating disorder. I did not write the initial comment but I wanted to say that I talked about it with my therapist but feel that I need someone specialized and to dedicate specific time to it.

  • Intern in IB - CB
Jan 24, 2021 - 3:02am

My size. I'm 6'2 but have a fairly narrow build and I find it difficult to put on muscle mass. I'm ex-military and have had shoulder injuries in the past that limit potential deltoid swoleness. Sometimes people call me skinny and it just gets under my skin; makes me feel weak even though I've done more hardcore things over a couple of years than they ever will in their lifetimes.

  • Prospect in IB - Gen
Jan 29, 2021 - 3:19pm

Fellow hard gainer here. Honestly, dude just constantly eat to enlarge your stomach. You gotta eat until you literally might throw up and feel like you constantly have to go to bathroom. In few months your body composition will change and will gain fat if you eat in general.

  • Analyst 1 in CorpDev
Jan 24, 2021 - 3:16am

No matter what I do or tell my parents, they refuse to see me (only child) as an independent adult that is capable of making his own decisions and doesn't need an ounce of their support in any way to be successful. Living with them again is only making it worse because they feel like they're providing for me and I get to live such a stress free life because I'm under their roof. The only benefit here is no rent/mortgage because I get no satisfaction in spending the best years of my life in this meaningless middle class boring suburban lifestyle they love so much

  • Analyst 1 in CorpDev
Jan 24, 2021 - 3:36am

It's def an option I'm considering soon. I have the means to move out at any time, but I just can't justify it at the moment since I'm wfh indefinitely. It still won't help the way my parents see me tho - I just moved home after spending 4 years living away from them while 100% financially taking care of my myself. The bigger problem is that I don't know how to tell my parents that I don't care about their bullshit cultural/family values (Son should live with parents, no alcohol, no late nights out, expectation that I will never get tats because "we don't do that", must consistently practice my religion even if I don't believe in it, etc). Their entire mentality is that moving out (and other fun things) is just a phase that I'll snap out of eventually lol. Its mental illness. You're right tho, moving out is my only option to get away because I don't see them changing any time soon. It's all from a good place because I know they care about me but man we just see the world and the meaning of life so differently. Rant over lol

  • Prospect in IB - Gen
Jan 24, 2021 - 11:02am

Still in university and didn't secure BB internship for the summer and feeling unsure about my future - not having anything laid out for when I graduate next summer is pretty daunting and just want to not have to worry about getting an internship/job.

  • Prospect in IB - Gen
Jan 29, 2021 - 6:58pm

Yeah it's looking like big4 or a small HF for this summer which I will happily take. However the nice thing is that there are so many routes so can always do mFin and/or OC and break into IB that way!

  • Intern in RE - Comm
Jan 26, 2021 - 10:09am

Aren't we all brother.  I know most of it comes down to genetics, but I was able to slow mine down quite a bit (actually think it may have stopped for now).  Take it easy on the smoking, start taking biotin, get enough sleep, and use coconut oil on your scalp a few times per week.

All the best bro

Jan 30, 2021 - 10:32am

Aren't we all brother.  I know most of it comes down to genetics, but I was able to slow mine down quite a bit (actually think it may have stopped for now).  Take it easy on the smoking, start taking biotin, get enough sleep, and use coconut oil on your scalp a few times per week.

I have been taking Biotin for several years.  I am not really sure if it helps but I do not want to take a chance and stop using it. You are right about genetics.   Three of my four grand parents had full heads of hear as seniors.  The only one who did not, had an eating disorder, which probably stunted hair growth.   However, good genes is not enough to slow down hair loss.    Every male will start losing hair eventually but there are probably things you can do to slow it down, if your genes are good.  I think you also have to be careful with products you put in your hair.  I use an natural shampoo.  Some of the shampoos out there have very harsh chemicals in them and I would think are terrible for your hair.  Your oil idea is a good one and that is basically what my shampoo gas it it, including coconut oil.  

All the best bro

http://www.series65examtutor.com
Jan 25, 2021 - 11:05am

The world my kids will live on and the challenges they will face. These can be sociological, environmental, economical, etc.

It helps me focus on giving them a broad base of values, spirit/vision and, hopefully, tools (education, creativity development, sports etc.) to cope with them and live a fulfilling and happy life.

I do think some major challenges will come ahead, and on some days I think mankind may be wise or intelligent enough to solve them, on other days it just looks gloom...

Jan 25, 2021 - 5:12pm

Lately I've been feeling like I've been living selfishly and not doing anything important. Probably quarter life crisis, I just turned 25. I've worked my way into a Senior Software Dev position at a pretty well known and large FinTech company but just feel.. unfulfilled in some strange way. My life is actually really good, I just feel like I want to do something with more purpose than for my own bank account. Donating money doesn't really move the needle for me either. 

“The three most harmful addictions are heroin, carbohydrates, and a monthly salary.” - Nassim Taleb
Jan 26, 2021 - 9:49am

Malta

Lately I've been feeling like I've been living selfishly and not doing anything important. Probably quarter life crisis, I just turned 25. I've worked my way into a Senior Software Dev position at a pretty well known and large FinTech company but just feel.. unfulfilled in some strange way. My life is actually really good, I just feel like I want to do something with more purpose than for my own bank account. Donating money doesn't really move the needle for me either. 

You should go share this with all the I hate IB threads.  Just shows if you are not doing something you love then you are probably not going to enjoy it. 

Jan 26, 2021 - 4:46pm

I don't know what I love that can support me income wise. I guess that's what I need to figure out

“The three most harmful addictions are heroin, carbohydrates, and a monthly salary.” - Nassim Taleb
Jan 27, 2021 - 2:51pm

I thought you were much older Malta, you're mature beyond your years

I've written a few existential comments over the years, maybe the below will help, but just real quick advice: turn inward. find what you believe to be the meaning of "purpose" for you, reflect on that, meditate on that, and whatever answer you're looking for should arise. maybe it's perspective, maybe it's a course correction, maybe it's something else, but you cannot find answers on how to fix yourself until you turn inward and focus on the self. ditto for doing something "important." what I view as meaningless you may view as meaningful, so turn inward, figure out what you mean by purpose and importance, and go from there. happy to brainstorm with you if you'd like

https://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forums/i-might-hate-finance-and-this-mi…

https://www.wallstreetoasis.com/forums/the-more-i-think-about-life-the-…

Feb 3, 2021 - 2:51pm

I've reread your comments that you linked to your reply about a dozen times each, thanks for sharing. That's brought quite a bit more clarity this past week for me. Really appreciate your advice- you've commented a couple times to me and it's always been golden. Username definitely checks out! 

“The three most harmful addictions are heroin, carbohydrates, and a monthly salary.” - Nassim Taleb
Feb 8, 2021 - 8:42pm

I used to them I switched to tech. Now a Sr Engineer at a financial institution (not a bank)

“The three most harmful addictions are heroin, carbohydrates, and a monthly salary.” - Nassim Taleb
Jan 25, 2021 - 8:46pm

I'm insecure about being boring or unconfident. I've tried to get better about it without just drinking more. The other day, on a date, a girl said, "You give off only child vibes." My first impression was a little worried in the back of my mind, but then she said, "Like really confident and assertive. Maybe spoiled." I was honestly pretty flattered because she had no idea how hard I've been working on stuff like my confidence and personality. I have a buddy that always goes up to random girls in bars and sparks up conversations, and they sort of nudged me to do the same, and now I've started doing it myself, which is sort of crazy looking back on how much I've come in the past few years. 

  • Intern in S&T - Equities
Jan 25, 2021 - 9:15pm

Is there anything else you've done to improve confidence? Have the same insecurity and it's very annoying, and I'm not sure how to go about getting more confident

Jan 25, 2021 - 10:34pm

My tiny, flaccid penis. I swear it's average when it's in action, but because I am a grower and not a shower; nude beaches, skinny dipping and strip poker are out of the picture entirely for me /:

Jan 26, 2021 - 12:44am

-

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

Jan 26, 2021 - 1:20am

tbh - I gotta cut back on the caffiene 

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

Jan 26, 2021 - 1:15am

-

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

Jan 26, 2021 - 1:16am

-

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

Jan 26, 2021 - 1:24am

-

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

  • Associate 3 in RE - Other
Jan 26, 2021 - 9:50am

From a dad / husband perspective, after a couple child births my wife's private parts are not what they used to be (translate: got looser, got wrecked).  Every once in a while, I wish I could grow mine huge to match, but things don't work that way unfortunately (regain that past glory).  I don't like the thought of dildos or anything artificial, and would hate to be a middle aged cuck (learned that word on WSO, congrats) but I see how some guys would try that.

My friend's mom divorced his dad when my friend was in college and I suspect BBC was part of the reason. He was one of three kids.

I sometimes wonder if C-section birth is better.  Well too late for that.

Also, my dad had a few wives and unfortunately didn't have the love of his life with him anymore at old age.  I would rather have that love of my life than be alone or with someone superficial.

  • Intern in AM - Other
Jan 26, 2021 - 2:30pm

I would rather have that love of my life than be alone or with someone superficial.

Same girl here from the top of this post. I think you have answered your own question here. You speak of extramarital affairs, but have you thought about the possibility of your wife starting to doubt your loyalty as well once you tell her that and make her feel like she's not enough? BumbleBee said it. You'll offend her. Maybe I'm just an insecure 21 year old, but if I were in her position my self esteem would be destroyed and I would start to think that you might be on SeekingArrangements trying to fondle with a 18 year old girl with a "tighter" private part.

Feel free to throw MS, but at the same time I feel like we all have to accept that aging is natural and our bodies will change over time (applies to both men and women). Unfortunately, no one is really talking about these issues and I feel that there is still a certain sense of shame in trying to be open about our fears of aging/post-childbirth changes etc. Are you willing to risk your marriage to someone you love very much (I assume) for this one minor issue in the grand scheme of things?

With regards to plastic surgery, she (or anyone else) should only get surgery because she wants it for herself, not because of another person pressuring her to get it.

  • Associate 3 in RE - Other
Jan 26, 2021 - 2:50pm

I would rather have that love of my life than be alone or with someone superficial.

Same girl here from the top of this post. I think you have answered your own question here. You speak of extramarital affairs, but have you thought about the possibility of your wife starting to doubt your loyalty as well once you tell her that? Maybe I'm just an insecure 21 year old, but if I were in her position my self esteem would be destroyed and I would start to think that you might be on SeekingArrangements trying to fondle with a 18 year old girl with a "tighter" private part.

Feel free to throw MS, but at the same time I feel like we all have to accept that aging is natural and our bodies will change over time (applies to both men and women). Unfortunately, no one is really talking about these issues and I feel that there is still a certain sense of shame in trying to be open about our fears of aging/post-childbirth changes etc. Are you willing to risk your marriage to someone you love very much (I assume) for this one minor issue in the grand scheme of things?

Good points and I'm ok with your 21 year old perspective.  No I'm not the type to cheat.  My wife actually was talking to me about a mommy makeover (boob and some lipo for the tummy areas) but I think she's perfect and have said that.  I actually turned the question around during a convo with other mommy friends, and said isn't it great that I don't want her to get a boob job?  And they all agreed that it's good that I like her naturally.  But, if she wants to live a little, that could be ok too. 
 

Regarding the private parts, it's I think an aged old thing (for as long as babies are being made).  I'm not generally an insecure person, just lamenting and having the mind wander with the comment about my friend's dad's divorce after the kids grew up.  It was then tying to a fear about no being able to spend quality time in the golden years with the girl I love. 
 

The post asked for biggest insecurity and perhaps my dad's experience (he died a widow, divorced) and ways my happy marriage with kids could fall apart (the other reason is about money) was something I wanted to add to this discussion. 
 

  • Associate 1 in PE - LBOs
Jan 26, 2021 - 3:35pm

I'm burnt out. HYPS -> Top EB -> Top UMM/MF, but the thrill of being the 'best' has ceased to be enough to justify the investment/sacrifice. Can't see myself lasting much longer in my current role and am not sure what I'll do when the other shoe drops, as I'll probably find a new job just as unfulfilling (even 'boring') as I did this one, IB, and school. 

Jan 26, 2021 - 8:22pm

interesting idea, thanks. do you find yourself feeling like you are 'acting' now in situations where you would have naturally been more awkward, or do you feel like you are naturally less awkward after having taken this acting class (worked on displaying a wider range of emotions maybe, so now you emote in these ways more often than you would have previously)?

  • Prospect in IB-M&A
Jan 26, 2021 - 8:35pm

Probably height lol (5'8 maybe 5'9 on a good day). I'm generally a very confident/popular individual and have had plenty of notches as I'm decently good looking. But I can't help not thinking that height could be a limiting factor for me at some point especially in high finance roles where 'taller' might potentially command a different/more positive type of reaction and is perceived to be more dominant whether you're interviewing for a job, dealing with client etc. 

Jan 27, 2021 - 7:30am

Probably height lol (5'8 maybe 5'9 on a good day). I'm generally a very confident/popular individual and have had plenty of notches as I'm decently good looking. But I can't help not thinking that height could be a limiting factor for me at some point especially in high finance roles where 'taller' might potentially command a different/more positive type of reaction and is perceived to be more dominant whether you're interviewing for a job, dealing with client etc. 

While i am sure there is data showing the correlation between height and success, my guess would be that other factors are more important.

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Jan 26, 2021 - 10:06pm

-

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee

Feb 1, 2021 - 9:05am

cheesyhone

the fact that I didn't get into IB but still read this forum

FT is still an option for you?

Array

  • Prospect in IB - Gen
Jan 29, 2021 - 3:39pm

I know it sounds corny, but nothing beats a good attitude and a hard working spirit. Would you want to hire a person that is super intelligent but when you give him a task at mid night or a task that is boring, he is super standoff-ish, or a hardworking person who will do the task no matter what time or any moment with an enthusiasm? Latter will be always chosen, because of human psychology and etc. I dont think any job in finance is unattainably hard (except for quant-like jobs) if you actively try to improve yourself. Just my 2 cents

Jan 28, 2021 - 7:41am

Getting back to the OPs original concern about not being handsome or tall.  When women are young, like guys, they might be on the hunt for the next hottest person.  As time goes on, this changes and women care less about how you look.  If you do not turn out to be an asshole, your female is likely to stay with you, especially if you are successful.  In contrast, for some men, their interest in hunting stays with them a lot longer.  Some of them act on it, while others do not.  

http://www.series65examtutor.com
Feb 12, 2021 - 11:29am

financeabc

 In contrast, for some men, their interest in hunting stays with them a lot longer.  Some of them act on it, while others do not.  

My struggle right now.  Currently in a relationship with a great girl but unsure as to whether I'm ready to tap out of dating/being single for good (I'm almost 34).  And no, I don't cheat nor have I ever cheated.  

  • VP in IB - Ind
Feb 12, 2021 - 8:15pm

You should only stick around if you can't imagine being both without her and with anyone else, especially for the next 60 years of your life. It doesn't work any other way

  • VP in IB - Ind
Feb 12, 2021 - 8:10pm

That is somewhat true from a "behavioral evolution" standpoint but you just have to find someone who keeps you on your toes.
 

We start looking elsewhere when we get bored, and we will eventually get bored if our women were hardly interesting people to begin with. 

Jan 28, 2021 - 9:26am

Kind of related joke: a group of British officers are interrogating a bunch of captured French soldiers.

One British officer says: "You French are a bunch of rogues, only fighting for money, we on the other hand, fight for honour!"

"Yes," a French soldier replies: "we both fight for whichever we lack the most."  

Jan 28, 2021 - 3:32pm

I'm a 21 (soon to be 22) virgin, never kissed a girl, never been on a date before, never even texted a girl apart from my sister, all my friends are males and all my group chats are like a sausage fest, and never ever seen those "signs" girls apparently give you when they're interested. At the same time, it's also my fault because I never made any effort to put myself out there. I also have something like a 98 in the Rice Purity Test, gives me the creeps to think if I died tomorrow, there's so much "stuff" I never would've been able to do/try.

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