Hedge Fund Grad Struggles
I started at a top hedge fund straight out of undergrad, but I can't continue in this industry any longer. I wake up everyday feeling very distraught with a pit in my stomach due to anxiety. Was very tough for me, I had poor parents, one with a gambling addiction who died a couple years ago. So when 2 of the teams I was in that both got fired within less than a year, I became very distraught, especially given my anxiety around money growing up. Now planning to transition into IB after close to 2 years in my hedge fund job because I cannot stand seeing people get fired anymore. I know its part of the industry, but I just frankly can't handle the stress. Any tips, and especially any encouragement would be very welcomed. I have too much anxiety to even begin looking at job postings for IB. Not to mention, hedge fund recruiters keep recommending me to other hedge funds instead of any jobs in the private markets which is frustrating. I think a job in IB will be good, given that I have strong modelling skills, its job stability and that it gives me options to decide what I want to work in, other than just PE. Not feeling like doing a masters due to costs. I'd genuinely appreciate any advice and encouragement. Please be nice :)
Will let the more seasoned folks share advice, but just want to say hang in there and take care of yourself. Nothing at work should make you feel that sick, there’s so much more to life.
Hang in there chief
I don't know your personality but consider things more broadly, maybe ER, IR, Risk, Corp Dev etc... could all work for you too.
I can’t speak to IB but maybe look at the sellside as someone else referenced. Still “stressful” when earnings come around but is a completely different kind of stress IMO.
Might get MS but I think you should try to tough it out a little longer. I myself come from a similar low income background. Worked in PE post grad and had chronic anxiety that made it difficult to function properly.
My word of advice is: you need to shift your perspective on shocks like these. Obviously, seeing your PMs get fired twice is intensely stressful. But letting the stress consume you does nothing but harm you in the long run. Why did they fail? What can you learn from their failures? These difficult experience carry immensely useful information.
Retreating into a safer, less stressful career seems like the natural option. But I’d argue that you can come out the other end here with an incredible career.
Find ways to handle the stress. Work out more. Join a run club. Be social. Have genuine connection in your life. You can’t run away from this stress, my friend. You have to face it head on and treat every mistake and roadblock as new information. No other way to do it.
Best of luck in your future endeavors
Thank you so much! You're right. I used to let anxiety drive me to work hard but I notice that it is no longer sustainable. What do you use as motivation yourself? Appreciate it very much.
Hey, keep you head up man! But I would think the stress in IB may also lead to that pit in your stomach feeling. Maybe try a LO or ETF specific shop.
I don't know too much about LO but my initial impression is that I would have to do IB->PE->LO or is there a better path around there?
Not every HF job has to be like that imho. My 2c.
I hear you and thank you for sharing. It is not easy going through what you're describing. As somebody who's been in the markets for 25+ years, I've experienced stress multiple times and it almost killed me, especially at my earlier days. "Toughen up" and "hang in there", might be well intentioned pieces of advice but never worked for me as their immediate application was elusive and impractical. There are many ways to deal with your anxieties and I'm happy to say that I managed to survive eventually after all these years. Learn to breathe and to relax. I hope you're better now since you wrote the message. Happy to discuss further if you want.
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