European B/S Banks are insane

Working at one of these shops is very painful but does allow one to make a good living.

I’m really wondering why some of them act the way they do in these lending deals. Do clients know about this? And if so, why would they even choose to work with them?

1.). They don’t treat clients like clients. These banks try to structure everything as if there client is going to gut the company and distribute everything as a dividend. The conversation with credit risk is never about financial issues but all about how the management might cheat us.
2.). Zero teamwork. Everyone who is a Director and above has an insane ego to the point where they want to challenge everything another director or senior person on another team says or does. This typically happens between coverage and product teams where things become unworkable. Everyone carves out their little niche and doesn’t want anyone else to opine.
3.) They promote bureaucrats rather than dealmakers. Come on… promoting someone who has never held a senior role in front office into a regional head of banking role? This doesn’t make any sense.
4.) There is never a clear risk appetite. We all know which deals GS and JPM are ok or not ok with doing. At these euro banks it could be that this one banker is disliked by this other guy in management and his deal gets killed.
5.) the risk department at these places are the rudest people on earth. They literally think they are god and order the front office to do stuff. There is no negotiation like at other places.
6.). They brag about being conservative and yet are still losing money because they do business in awful jurisdictions or do deals in the project finance space where they think they can structure things well (bc no other lender would even do the deal) and eventually lose money because the project is shit.

Does anyone else think like I this or am I the only one?

 
4.) There is never a clear risk appetite. We all know which deals GS and JPM are ok or not ok with doing. At these euro banks it could be that this one banker is disliked by this other guy in management and his deal gets killed.
 

LOL had this happen on something I was working on.

 

I work at a US MM bank in a capital markets role and I gotta say this is still spot on for even the bank I work at

 

arbjunkie

europeans dont give a shit about making money. have worked with many euro companies, this is universally true. everything is about politics with them

Ya we call them Europoors for a reason

 
Almosttoolate

These banks try to structure everything as if there client is going to gut the company and distribute everything as a dividend. The conversation with credit risk is never about financial issues but all about how the management might cheat us.

Given how weak docs have become in this cycle (uptier exchanges, trapdoors, unrestricted subs etc etc), that's a pretty sensible thing for risk to be worrying about, and shows sophistication beyond "OK, tell me what the FCF is and how long it would take to amortise the cap stack to zero assuming 100% sweep" or "is it <6x? Wave it in".

 

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