"I do not think that there is any other quality so essential to success of any kind as the quality of perseverance. It overcomes almost everything, even nature."
I gotta be honest - from all the posts I've read on WSO, every single time you comment, one thought comes to mind - you're a complete dick. I don't understand why you constantly comment with useless shit when people on this forum actually want advice.
That's where you are wrong...specifically with the "professional relationship". I dont think he would ever make any advances but just because your a girl he may be drawn and willing to help you more. Take that how you will.
Write a handwritten note thanking him for his help. And then leave it at that. As other users have noted, unfortunately you are treading a fine line and anything more personal such as a coffee/lunch may send him the wrong message.
Write a handwritten note thanking him for his help. And then leave it at that. As other users have noted, unfortunately you are treading a fine line and anything more personal such as a coffee/lunch may send him the wrong message.
Thank you for the idea, I think that's the plan now.
But I still don't understand how i'm treading a fine line- I simply responded to his offers/suggestions. He would initiate contact 80% of the time so it's not like I was clingy/flirty/over talkative at all. It's not fair, my friends go out to drinks with their frat bro's who helped them out but for me shake shack = f**k me please? I seriously doubt professional adults think about sex in every single situation/context as WSO makes them out to.
lululemon93 He would initiate contact 80% of the time so it's not like I was clingy/flirty/over talkative at all. It's not fair, my friends go out to drinks with their frat bro's who helped them out but for me shake shack = f**k me please?
lolwut
you seem incredibly naive. in any case people here were just trying to offer friendly advice. so calm yourself or gtfo
Is it out of line to treat him to lunch, coffee? I'm going to be a ( female) intern at another bank and he's an associate.
oh boy.
i mean if you're the kind of girl that tends to get male attention, then alarm bells should already be going off in your head about what he might want...nevertheless you should definitely thank him by writing him a note
i'd also advise you to delete this thread asap because your situation is pretty unique and if he frequents wso then he'll have no trouble figuring out who you are
At first I was disappointed that I arrived too late to read the OP before it was wiped clean (common occurrence now that WSO is gradually turning into a forum focused on relationships and personal problems), but luckily I was able to piece together most of it from user commentary.
And it goes without saying but OP is completely clueless unfortunately (a bit ironic given the reference to super tight yoga pants that highlight certain parts of the body)...I think @"kidflash" summed it up well.
This was completely blown out of proportion if I could delete 75% of the responses it would have been a decent/helpful thread. I asked the question because someone told me they would be offended if a girl/intern tried to pay for lunch or it was weird to ask. I didn't need multiple users telling me to suck *** or I'm asking to get railed.
If i'm clueless/naive for not believing that every guy I encounter who tries to help has ulterior motives then I guess it's true. I'm not completely retarded I know some might, but id like to belive that he thought I was competent and hardworking and worthy of the time-investment.
@Going Concern you're reading wayyyyyy to into the username
If i'm clueless/naive for not believing that every guy I encounter who tries to help has ulterior motives then I guess it's true.
Ulterior is a harsh word. Look, I'm going to tell you something and I'm not trying to cause too much trouble here...if a guy is helping a girl, any girl, at some level he has some sort of desire to sleep with her, unless that guy is gay or related. That's just the simple truth. He may not ever act on that desire or even consciously acknowledge it, but it's there. You can either get offended and upset and refuse to accept it, or you can exploit those feelings to your advantage...the choice is all yours.
OP had a guy hit on her by "helping" her through the recruiting process at his firm
She's not sure why he's helping her
She didn't get an offer at his firm but wants to ask him out to "thank" him
She's now upset that WSO thinks that this harmless banker that just wanted to help her is going to try to get into her pants if she asks him out to lunch, etc.
Look OP, I'm going to give you some advice: he's trying to get into your pants. Now that I've helped you, please proceed to offering me lunch. I promise you I'm just a harmless banker that's trying to build a "professional" relationship with you.
The comments in here re: men helping women because they want sex indicate some pretty miserable states of mind.
I've helped out younger women professionally without such desire. Indeed, without even biasing my internet porn habits towards the same hair colour or ethnic features.
Those who can, do. Those who can't, post threads about how to do it on WSO.
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Invite him to lunch. Whether or not he accepts, the offer itself tells him you appreciate his work.
Lol last line makes me wonder if he wants to smashorz.
But anyway, I always liked coffee better than lunch. Coffee is mellower/relaxed and also more conducive to actually having a conversation.
Buy him lululemon
@jbone24 haha I don't think he's into yoga gear
Anyone who is anyone is into lulu. I'm either in my work clothes or in lulu, most comfortable clothes ever.
suck his dick
come on guys...
I gotta be honest - from all the posts I've read on WSO, every single time you comment, one thought comes to mind - you're a complete dick. I don't understand why you constantly comment with useless shit when people on this forum actually want advice.
the fact you are a girl changes everything honestly
How so, can the invite be misconstrued? I have a hard time believing my gender really changes much in a professional friendship.
That's where you are wrong...specifically with the "professional relationship". I dont think he would ever make any advances but just because your a girl he may be drawn and willing to help you more. Take that how you will.
It's pretty obvious that he wants to smash
An invite to lunch is just asking to get railed
Oh and
"I have no idea why they initially reached out to me"
"I'm going to be a ( female) intern."
Sums it all up.
Write a handwritten note thanking him for his help. And then leave it at that. As other users have noted, unfortunately you are treading a fine line and anything more personal such as a coffee/lunch may send him the wrong message.
Thank you for the idea, I think that's the plan now.
But I still don't understand how i'm treading a fine line- I simply responded to his offers/suggestions. He would initiate contact 80% of the time so it's not like I was clingy/flirty/over talkative at all. It's not fair, my friends go out to drinks with their frat bro's who helped them out but for me shake shack = f**k me please? I seriously doubt professional adults think about sex in every single situation/context as WSO makes them out to.
lolwut
you seem incredibly naive. in any case people here were just trying to offer friendly advice. so calm yourself or gtfo
i mean if you're the kind of girl that tends to get male attention, then alarm bells should already be going off in your head about what he might want...nevertheless you should definitely thank him by writing him a note
i'd also advise you to delete this thread asap because your situation is pretty unique and if he frequents wso then he'll have no trouble figuring out who you are
At first I was disappointed that I arrived too late to read the OP before it was wiped clean (common occurrence now that WSO is gradually turning into a forum focused on relationships and personal problems), but luckily I was able to piece together most of it from user commentary.
And it goes without saying but OP is completely clueless unfortunately (a bit ironic given the reference to super tight yoga pants that highlight certain parts of the body)...I think @"kidflash" summed it up well.
This was completely blown out of proportion if I could delete 75% of the responses it would have been a decent/helpful thread. I asked the question because someone told me they would be offended if a girl/intern tried to pay for lunch or it was weird to ask. I didn't need multiple users telling me to suck *** or I'm asking to get railed.
If i'm clueless/naive for not believing that every guy I encounter who tries to help has ulterior motives then I guess it's true. I'm not completely retarded I know some might, but id like to belive that he thought I was competent and hardworking and worthy of the time-investment.
@Going Concern you're reading wayyyyyy to into the username
To sum up this thread:
OP had a guy hit on her by "helping" her through the recruiting process at his firm
She's not sure why he's helping her
She didn't get an offer at his firm but wants to ask him out to "thank" him
She's now upset that WSO thinks that this harmless banker that just wanted to help her is going to try to get into her pants if she asks him out to lunch, etc.
Look OP, I'm going to give you some advice: he's trying to get into your pants. Now that I've helped you, please proceed to offering me lunch. I promise you I'm just a harmless banker that's trying to build a "professional" relationship with you.
@Going Concern I appreciate the advice, thanks.
Great, glad I could help...we should grab some drinks to celebrate :)
The comments in here re: men helping women because they want sex indicate some pretty miserable states of mind.
I've helped out younger women professionally without such desire. Indeed, without even biasing my internet porn habits towards the same hair colour or ethnic features.
Interesting
Distinctio ut nihil id ex. Ut dolor commodi autem vero porro voluptatem consectetur. Ut autem dicta blanditiis sed.
Autem ad non quasi consequatur non. Minima aut quae iure molestias aut eaque.
Veniam esse qui quisquam consequatur quod ut. Dolorem rerum dolorum laboriosam nihil. Non tenetur nostrum tempore suscipit sit. Vitae natus nisi corrupti. Aut qui molestiae aut dolore.
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Eos natus labore quia porro. Molestias ex voluptate est corporis rerum sint omnis. Ea et sit dolore quisquam optio amet quaerat. Qui voluptas voluptatum deleniti nam veritatis iste.
Beatae odit sit dicta magni. Delectus sit dolore et unde delectus cum. Voluptatem rerum ab eum voluptas autem.
Esse nesciunt ut ut ut iusto laborum. Omnis est officia distinctio culpa dolor. Dolores quia nihil et et velit omnis nobis ut. Sint iusto eius eligendi ab.