How do you stay motivated about your career?
I don't give an F anymore. I'm in a position I guess people envy, I used to be so driven that's how I got here. But everything seems so dry. I hate the corporate game and corporate drones that surround me. I will never be the ideal "Corporate man", well-spoken and good with people and politics and able to put up fake charm and eloquent. I used to get excited by the prospect of working on deals but it all seems so meaningless. I dread and hate reading company presentations and modeling and drafting presentations, they're so fucking dry I start falling asleep midway I'd rather stare at a blank wall. I have 0 motivation to become like my VPs and directors, even if they are ostensibly the pinnacle of success as defined by society. No exit opps seem interesting. I dont' give a F about PE or Corp Dev, I have all these interviews lined up and I've been ghosting them. I only applied to them when I "guilt trip" myself into doing "something" and because it's what I'm "supposed" to do if I don't want to be a homeless bum and be an adult. I don't know what to do about my girlfiend of 3 years who's been with me through thick and thin, I think I love her but I don't feel anything anymore. It's Monday and I have a set of comments to turn but I'm going out to buy a pack of cigarettes now. I wanna time travel back in time
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