IB Ruining My Love/Sex Life

Serious post looking for advice

I’m a second year at a BB. I’ll start by saying:  Career wise, I’m extremely proud of myself- I was able to score a position at my dream fund, ranked top bucket last year, and am the “go-to” analyst for the live high profile deals in my group. While I feel satisfied with the reputation I’ve made for myself, it without a doubt was a product of being the absolute GRIND for the last 1.5ish years of my life. Totally a proud hardo in that respect

I totally de-emphasized my love life and non-platonic relationships to chicks. Whenever I had free time outside work, it was spent with my support system- my buddies and family. For the former, I totally deemphasized “getting ass” when going out with them and instead prioritized shooting the shit with them / quality time. 

Lately, it’s been coming on to me that I’m quite literally deprived of a woman’s touch. Jokes aside, I literally have been going through the driest period of my life and feel like I’m back at all boys boarding school. Also feel like I’m loosing my touch.

Is there even enough hours in the day? How do you guys get game / allocate time for getting into dating, casual or serious? My work schedule is still demanding of all of my time, so feeling a bit lost.


Sincerely,

a very sexually frustrated kid

 
Funniest

sounds like you prefer to spend your rare free time with men

you sure this sexual frustration isnt from not going all in on your "real" desires, aka smashing other dudes?

you are self sabotaging your self around girls..  There's a deep seated reasoning behind this and while you might think it's the IB hardo grind, its most likely due to your subconscious desire to be balls deep in another dude

 

Given the fact that he's an IB hardo it is more likely that he wants some bodybuilder working in wealth management to go balls deep in him

 

If OP is turned off by this comment, it might mean he prefers catching vs pitching (I.e. having other bros balls deep in him) 

 

Nah nah nah. Don't go there. Figuratively or literally. Dated one once and wound up getting to know everyone on a real first name basis. Looking back, totally not worth it. 

...ok it's been two. Fine, almost three. Not even Pizz would've pulled this stupid string of stunts I'm sure. You don't deserve MS, but that's still not great advice from someone with experience.

The poster formerly known as theAudiophile. Just turned up to 11, like the stereo.
 

It's important to maintain relationships with friends and family, there's nothing wrong with prioritizing those relationships. Given your schedule, it's unlikely you'll be able to find dates the traditional way, through hobbies or going out to bars/clubs. These activities all require regular commitment and it'll be rude to keep blowing people off due to work. I think online dating and seeking someone who can sympathize with your work schedule is the best bet. There are plenty of online dating options and probably the most time efficient way of finding a date of high quality

 

From the moment pizz’s crush sat in his lap on that bus ride, he knew life came down to one single pursuit: ASS

 
damani0085

Get a pet- cat or dog = cuddle problem solved 

I don't think it would be very nice to have a dog and in IB. The dog would be cooped up in some small ass apt all day, unless he has a yard or something, which is unlikely in NYC. The best would to be to get two cats or something.

"If you always put limits on everything you do, physical or anything else, it will spread into your work and into your life. There are no limits. There are only plateaus, and you must not stay there, you must go beyond them." - Bruce Lee
 

Isaiah_53_5 💎🙌💎🙌💎

damani0085

Get a pet- cat or dog = cuddle problem solved 

I don't think it would be very nice to have a dog and in IB. The dog would be cooped up in some small ass apt all day, unless he has a yard or something, which is unlikely in NYC. The best would to be to get two cats or something.

It's time for another A2D short! There's always doggy daycare for the days you don't work remote. My dog goes nuts when I mention taking her there for the day because she loves it so much or when I mention a certain neighbor is coming to pick her up to watch her for the day. For having two cats instead of one? That's how you do it if you go that route. They have each other to play with while you're gone and cats are very low maintenance.

But just remember the old saying, "Dogs look at you and think you're some kind of god. Cats look at you and think they're a god."

The poster formerly known as theAudiophile. Just turned up to 11, like the stereo.
 

Stay celibate until becoming MD. Once you reach it, target latinas from abroad in their 20s dreaming about getting the US citizenship.

 

At a BB and can't find a single woman that notices/checks you at work? I would maybe go that route instead of the dating apps, honestly.

 
Most Helpful

Step 1: Find the hottest woman at your bank in another department

Step 2: Say hi to her (the hardest part)

Step 3: Ask her to go out sometime (wear a diaper to avoid leakage)

Step 4: Go on the date and woo her (think Andrew Tate misogyny mixed with Kanye racism)

Step 5: When you're leaving the date, throw a stack of money at her (fake money preferred)

Step 6: When you have sex, plant the seed and lock her in for the next 18ish years

Boom, you now have unlimited woman touch for a while. Hopefully, if you make enough money she'll stick around and maybe even pretend to enjoy your company. Good luck brother.

 
quantmonkey13

Step 5: When you're leaving the date, throw a stack of money at her (fake money preferred)

Step 6: When you have sex, plant the seed and lock her in for the next 18ish years

Step 5: Use Monopoly money. Go for the gold.

Step 6: Just be careful, because if she does decide to split you're losing half your stuff, paying alimony and then child support. Not to mention anything else in any kind of prenup or the therapy bills.

The poster formerly known as theAudiophile. Just turned up to 11, like the stereo.
 

Mr_Agree_to_Disagree

quantmonkey13

Step 5: When you're leaving the date, throw a stack of money at her (fake money preferred)

Step 6: When you have sex, plant the seed and lock her in for the next 18ish years

Step 5: Use Monopoly money. Go for the gold.

Step 6: Just be careful, because if she does decide to split you're losing half your stuff, paying alimony and then child support. Not to mention anything else in any kind of prenup or the therapy bills.

Important caution on step 6. I know someone paying child support for one of his kids - his baby momma's car and crib is bigger than his!

 

Have you considered calling things off with top bucket/hardo life? Look, I know the extra $8k post tax is hard to say no to in exchange for averaging 10 more hours of work per week, and I know the joy and prestige that comes with stating "top" on annual bonus threads. But I've found middle to upper middle bucket banking tends to give you a better WLB. Sure, you lose the privilege of showing to the world that you enjoy getting on your knees for your MD who can't remember your name after 2 years of working together, but you'll have more time to take care of yourself and live a life outside of this job.

 

Grind your 20s and when you're close to 30 live your life. Dating takes a lot of time and your interests will develop more over your 20s.

 

Some lads are joking but some are just being mean and jealous about what you have achieved from your career. A lot of people might want to trade their romantic relationships to get what you have now.

No need to regret or feel sorry for yourself for not getting sex or girlfriend because of IB job. That’s what every banker signed up. You can get anything but you can’t get everything—-that’s true for almost all of us. As for your challenge, dating is also a number’s game. Just keep meeting people from all channels, you will get there if you want a LT relationship. And dating apps are available for ST.

 

unless you're a chad/tyrone (6 ft+ and attractive) i would not bother dating 

look into getting a sugar baby if you're just average looking at best. relationships dont work anymore for the vast majority of us 

alpha currency trader wanna-be
 

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